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  1. #1
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    Default Pressure to breastfeed rather than express

    I just had my one week visit from the child health nurse. You should have seen her face when i said i was expressing. It was like I had committed murder. She then went on to preach about how to get bub to attach etc. i know all of this....it just doesnt work for me, hence expressing. Besides, it works for us as it means DF gets to be involved.

    Why did she have to make me feel so guilty?? Its still the same milk, its just in a bottle. What is the big deal!! How is it any different?

    Please make me feel better....i feel like a complete failure now...
    Last edited by pilbarablossom; 20-07-2012 at 17:49.

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    Pffft, ignore her!

    The world health organisation do say that the best order for infant nutrition is -from the breast, then ebm from a bottle, so be proud of doingso well!
    I know several mums who have expressed full time for 6+ months, so it's doable and just as good for baby (provided you're not proving the bottle :P )

    So pffft to that lady, ignore her
    She's clearly got issues

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  4. #3
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    Theophania is offline 'see what had happened was..there were these three ninjas and a blue monkey and well it really wasn't my fault..'
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    If your bub won't attach to the breast properly then expressing is the next best thing. It is alot more work, but if its working for you then there shouldn't be a problem... I don't understand why she would have a problem with that??? Atleast you are still persisting with breast milk and not formula. Sounds like you are doing a great job...

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    What a knob!

    Not everyone's boobs and babies fit together. My bubba couldn't attach. I had fully intended to bf but if it doesn't work it work.

    I expressed for a month then went formula. Expressing is really hard. When you do decide to chuck it in and go formula don't feel guilty about it. Your baby is fed and loved. That's all that matters.

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    All I can think of is that she might be thinking of bonding issues? Like, breastfeeding would create a closer bond with bubs than feeding EBM from a bottle? I don't know, but for me it is all about providing bubs with the right nutrition regardless how you present it. better than formula.

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    Firstly, congratulations on the new baby!

    Maternal health nurses can often often upset new mums. I had one who made me feel like crap when I said I couldn't persist with BFing anymore. Then the next one I saw was the opposite and lovingly told me that we don't go through all the trouble of having a baby to suffer and not enjoy it, so do whatever works for YOU - bugger what the health nurse thinks. Enjoy your fresh new baby!

    I found expressing really hard so switched to FF at six weeks and my DD is thriving (now 19 mths). She has a vocab of 100+ words and can count to ten so don't believe the rubbish about formula/BF and IQ either

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    Congrats on bubs! Ignore her comments I say I struggled to b/feed my DD so expressed full time until she was 6 months old. It wasnt easy and I spend many hours attached to a pump but I figured DD was still getting breastmilk so it was worth it in my eyes. I found CYH nurses were quick to talk me down for bottle feeding even though it was EBM yet didnt really give any support to help me breastfeed.... do what works best for you and bubs is my theory.
    Last edited by waitinghoping; 20-07-2012 at 19:03.

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    I had massive dramas breastfeeding. Attachment was terrible and it hurt a LOT.

    I was determined to BF even if it were EBM. For the first few months of my babies life he had EBM and boob, but mostly EBM.

    The first two weeks was purely EBM. It was tiring and time consuming but I did it. Eventually after about 2-3 weeks I tried nipple shields which helped with the pain and attachment, as I just couldn't seem to keep up with the expressing, it took too long and was stressful wen I didn't have milk ready with a screaming baby.

    I then did a mix as my nipples were extremely raw and painful. Again the expressing was time consuming but i knew I had to do it.

    Eventually once bub got a bit bigger and learnt to attach better and the pain resided, I ditched the EXpressing and just used shields.

    I guess what I'm saying is I know sorta what u r going through and it can be done. Do what works for you.

    I can only guess she's trying to help you in the long term with bonding and time etc.

    I'm sure she didn't mean it how it sounded. *hugs*

    If it makes u feel any better, DS is now 14 months and I only stopped BF him 2 days ago. I ditched the shields when he was 4.5 months and it's been easier every day.

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    Can I just add, don't let the whole "bonding" thing scare you - parents who bottlefeed can have just a strong bond with their babies. Me and my DD are best buddies and my mum bottlefed me and we've always been super close. You can still cuddle your cherub close while your bottle feeding

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    In the long term, expressing is alot harder than direct breastfeeding and therefore harder to keep it up (as described by some of the previous posters).

    There are advantages** to direct breastfeeding that you don't get from bottlefeeding EBM, but EBM is preferable to ABM.

    I would assume that the MCHN was just trying to see if she could offer advice to help get breastfeeding working for you. Breastfeeding is a learned skilled and can take a little while to work out.

    You have to do what works for you, but being open to information and to check the info against your choices can help ensure your decisions are informed. If you are aware of the benefits and potential issues with your choice and ok with them then long term you will also feel comfortable with your choices.


    ** e.g. if a baby is sick it can pass antigens to the mum from its mouth to the breast when the baby feeds at the breast. mum then makes antibodies to the antigens which come out in the milk and go to baby. Baby is then better able to fight off the bugs causing the sickness.

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