So many random people I don't really know ask this....sorry but we don't want to be like everyone else and have lots of kids..one is lovely and peaceful and easy..and cheap....I don't want to be exhausted by a bunch of kids..life can be great with just one..
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10-07-2012 17:42 #11Senior Member
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- Nov 2008
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10-07-2012 17:52 #12
Dd who is 9 keeps asking when dp and I are going to have a baby lol, not really the same as everyone else but we just try to fob her off just incase it doesn't happen iykwim ?
10-07-2012 17:59 #13
I never ask people this question because you never know what's going on in their life.
I have been asked but it was always "do you think you'll have more kids" not so much "when is the next one". I always answered with "yeah, someday "
I had to stop myself laughing the last time I was asked because I am pregnant and wanted to wait to tell people so I still gave the same answer.
10-07-2012 18:18 #14
I have one 16 mth old son and I get the same question usually once or twice a week my standard response to when are u having another one is "well, not today!" seems to end every conversation
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10-07-2012 18:24 #15
It's so annoying isn't it. You'd think with all the trouble people seem to have falling pregnant it wouldn't be asked all the time. I'd say I get asked about once per week. It really sh!ts me when the question comes from people who know I was in ICU after having DD and don't seem to get that there might be a reason why I've not had another!!!
10-07-2012 18:33 #16Senior Member
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- Jun 2012
- gold coast
I got it all the time and for awhile there we weren't even sure if we wanted anymore as I suffered pnd and didn't know if I could cope having another baby too close after DS. We decided after we got married in 2010 that we wanted to start trying again but were like if it happens it happens. I would tell people we are having lots of fun trying my sister lost a baby at 21 weeks a year ago so I chose to stop trying for awhile as it was too hard, but we decided at the start of this year we wanted to start TTC for real & am now 18 weeks preg. We now get the wow 5 year gap that's a bit big isn't it why didn't you try earlier. Any way you can't win either way just keep telling people when you are ready you will in the mean time you are having fun trying/getting lots of practice in
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10-07-2012 18:33 #17
I was asked yesterday "when's the next one?"
Really? Haven't even given birth and I should have an answer for you, stupid head?
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10-07-2012 18:42 #18
There is this one woman at work who asks me this EVERY week, at least once.
She's told me her parents had 4 kids and managed fine and she has 3 and is fine
She's told me until I have another we won't have a real family
And she's told me that it's a form of abuse to have an old child.
She asked yesterday an I said "no, we are only having one, then I can spend time teaching her manners and how to mind her own business, something that apparently your parents overlooked" then I walked off!
Hopefully that will be the end of it
[note, I'm not normally a ***** but 3 years of this was enough for me]
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10-07-2012 18:45 #19
10-07-2012 18:45 #20
I was asked this question for 12 YEARS! And HATED it! People made me feel like a freak because I "only" had one child Everyone, from work collegues, family to complete strangers wanted to know
a) Am I having anymore?
b) Why I hadn't had another one "yet"?
and c) What was wrong with me!
Though the last one wasn't said, it's how they made me feel. I'd get the same look of confusion when I didn't come up with a satisfying enough response. Truth be told, *I* wasn't sure of the reason myself; just knew that if it was meant to happen it would. I had DS at 17. Although no regrets and I'm still with my partner all these years later, I had some pretty bad episodes of depression and stuff over the years and just knew that there was always the possibility that having another child could trigger it off again.
People just don't think; how do they know that I haven't tried and failed at having another baby? How do they know that it's not a sensitive topic for me? I wasn't about to tell a complete stranger that I'd suffered from severe depression and was absolutely terrified to have another baby because of that.
It honestly got to the point where I considered telling anyone who asked (outside of friends and family) that I was simply unable, due to medical problems, to have any more. It was the only thing I gathered could shut them up.
And now that I'm pregnant with my second, with an almost 13 year age gap between kids, people feel the need to remind me that this will be like having "another only child".
Wish everyone would mind their own damn business!
Last edited by ~Marigold~; 10-07-2012 at 19:00.
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