Am I just hormonal?

[Atropos]

So BM called the step kids tonight (we have them for hols) and told DSD (10) she has an opportunity to meet a famous type person. DSS(7) and my DD(9) are not invited. This is on a night she is at our place. BM didn't mention this to DH before telling DSD and has put him in a position where he has to say yes. I had plans for us all that night (just movies, but there isn't another time we can all go) that now can go ahead. DD is jealous as hell that DSD can go meet this person. DSS seems a bit put out too.
I'm really annoyed. I'm happy DSD gets a cool opportunity, but sad the others miss out. I'm annoyed it's ended our family outing plans. I'm super p1ssed BM did not discuss this with DH prior to telling DSD.
Am I being unreasonable?

[HugsBunny]

No you're not being unreasonable.

BUT would you have denied your DSD the opportunity even if BM HAD discussed it with DH first?

[River Song]

No you're not being unreasonable.

BUT would you have denied your DSD the opportunity even if BM HAD discussed it with DH first?

this

it is OK to be sad your plans have changed...but still go to the movies with the others.

no one has to miss out on a special treat

[Atropos]

No you're not being unreasonable.

BUT would you have denied your DSD the opportunity even if BM HAD discussed it with DH first?

It wouldn't have been up to me.
I guess I just hate that BM is so thoughtless in general and this is just another example. She knows it's DH's time, she knew he wouldn't be able to say no, she didn't check if we had plans, were away, were busy or whatever IYKWIM.

[Atropos]

this

it is OK to be sad your plans have changed...but still go to the movies with the others.

no one has to miss out on a special treat

We can't as we have to drop off DSD and then be home for her after her meet and greet, the times don't fit. I know I'm hormonal and moody at the moment (bub due in 10.5 wks) but I guess I'm just so sick of this awful woman Maybe its just the icing on the cake after a bad day or something. Sorry to whinge!

[River Song]

I would (as a BM) absolutely ring and let my child know if they could meet a celebrity...i don't think she would have had much say in the "when".

Although, i would make BM do the running around and make her meet your times so you could still go out!

[Hannahly]

Who does she get to see? Just nosy!

[Atropos]

I would (as a BM) absolutely ring and let my child know if they could meet a celebrity...i don't think she would have had much say in the "when".

Although, i would make BM do the running around and make her meet your times so you could still go out!

Yes, but for all she knew we'd be away. What then? I just think it would be a courtesy to make sure DSD would be available before telling her IYKWIM?

[brooke88(mum2b09)]

I don't think you're being unreasonable OP, I'd be annoyed too. Especially at the exclusion of the others.
It would have been more tactful and polite to speak to your DH first.

[VicPark]

There *might* not be any ill-intent on the bm's part.

As pp said, with a celebrity she wouldn't have a say in when the meeting was.

As for asking/telling your hubby first, that's a fair point. Perhaps she just had a brain fart, was excited and didn't think. It's a little disappointing that the other kids couldn't go (especially your step son). I gather there were limits of some sort and a valid reason why the sd and not ss gets to go?

Try not to get too worked up. Movie night can easily be changed.