No I wouldn't. If they needed help I would help them but I want my children to learn the value of money and standing on your own 2 feet. I know ppl who have had everything handed to them and they just expect it
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19-06-2012 10:01 #41Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2010
19-06-2012 10:02 #42
If we won Lotto we'd pay off our parents' debts... I'd be mighty annoyed if they didn't do the same for us!
19-06-2012 10:02 #43Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2007
If I won lotto or something, probably - yes. Although wouldn't go overboard, have read too many horror stories of lotto winners ruining their own and their children's lives.
If I'd just saved for it, I don't think so. I've never been handed anything on a silver platter and when DP and I earn something we truly appreciate it.
I do think it's odd that she put it that way "I could give you money, but nah"... that just seems mean. I'd keep it to myself and put you all in my Will TBH.
19-06-2012 10:04 #44
depends on a few different things.
1. Their character, if I paid off their house and i thought they would just bum around and play the playstation all day, then no i wouldn't. But if they would still go about their life, working and supporting their family then sure!
2. Obviously if i had the funds to do it and wasn't going to put out myself i would.
I don't see the point in watching your kids struggle badly if you had the means to help them. And most of all, its not just your kids, but possibly your gandbabies as well.
They will end up with the money when you are dead anyways, so why not help them while you are still alive and see the benefits for yourself, and also not letting them struggle so badly just to prove a point.
I would still feel blessed to have a house whether its through hard work or a gift. Still a house at the end of the day!
19-06-2012 10:11 #45
For everyone who has said they dont understand the reponses where people have said, 'no, they wouldn't', not one of them (that I can see) have said they wouldn't help their children out in a heartbeat or something along those lines.
Not paying off your child(rens) mortgage doesn't automatically equate to not wanting to help your children or see them well as the people who have said 'yes, they would'.
Just as aside, as it's cropping up, I actively encourage my parents to spend their money now and enjoy the fruits of 'their' labour, not leave it to us kids in a will. I would rather have them here, alive, living life then worrying about leaving us kids any money which I know they do constantly.
Last edited by Mod-Uniquey; 19-06-2012 at 10:14.
19-06-2012 10:23 #46
And I do think parents should be able to enjoy their money.
I probably won't have squat to give my kids so im just talking from my own personal experience where my dad and my uncle where business partners for yrs adn ended up with equal financial situations.
My dad spends his money on himself and enjoys it. It is true he has spend a fair chunk of his savings on us as well, but still has a decent income and ample investments to support his retirement/aged care/medical etc.
My uncles gives his kids very little and every cent is basically repaid. When they retired a few yrs ago I think he gave them $20k each but that was it - any other was a loan and he would never buy them anythign for their houses, car etc. So he has investment to support himself, a healthy income each yr AND a fair amount of cash/money in the bank. I understand he doesn't hve the money in cash to pay out each childs mortage (niehter does my dad) but he has enough to give them a decent chunk towards it or to treat them here and there with luxuries they would otherwise go without but doesn't do it. IT would not impact on his lifestyle or living or security - it would reduce his 'cash' but at the end of the day it will be his kids anyway?
This is what I don't get?
All kids/cousins (there are 6 of us) are hard working and fairly independent. None of us would pull up stumps on working and sit around all day. We would keep working, enjoy more time wiht our kids with abit less pressure day to day and also be able to safe to provide our kids a qualitity of life we were fortunate enoguh to expereince.
19-06-2012 10:28 #47Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2011
I don't know. Depends on the situation. My parents were always shocking financially and got help until they were almost 50 years old - when my maternal grandparents passed away they had to learn to be more responsible. I wouldn't want my kids to be like this - have no money but still buy a flat screen tv, cable and 3 computers, go overseas twice a year etc.
I never got help from my parents,nor did DP from hers, and we're pretty good, have never been in debt and have savings. I do think it's because both our sets of parents were so bad and we always knew we couldn't rely on anyone but ourselves for money.
Saying that, if my kids were responsible and needed financial help - I wouldn't think about for a sec, I'd help them. If they asked for help but wasted their money on stuff like electronics/vacations/going out, then no.
I really like the idea of "for every dollar you save, I'll add one for your savings". That way I help, but only if they help themselves too.
19-06-2012 10:30 #48-
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
We have it and we will help them. After we teach them about money and such, the way ILs did for DF. It won't just be handed to them on a silver platter, they will need to be reasonable and responsible with our help.
19-06-2012 10:31 #49
Absolutely. Life is about more than money and paying mortgages. If I was in a position to ensure DD didn't have to worry about money, and could spend her life doing whatever it is that made her feel happy and fulfilled then of course I would. I wouldn't want her slaving away in a job she hated, never having time for family or experiences, if I could help it.
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19-06-2012 10:39 #50
For sure. If I had lots of money I'd pay it off in full. If I had average money I'd pay it off and let them repay me interest free. I mean I'd rather them have the money than some big faceless bank, which is what happens with interest repayments.
To be honest, I was living with my parents and asked to buy their house, which is what I grew up in and love. They agreed and rather than get out a loan I'm paying it off directly. However my parents said it will be yours when we die anyway, you might as well have it now and pay your sisters out. So each month I pay my sisters the housing repayments which helps us all out immensely. My parents are awesome and it hasn't taught me to be any less responsible with money, I will just have it paid off on 12 years rather than 30 and the bank loses out.
I would also help my children buy a car because I want them in the safest car possible, not what they can afford. It will have every safety feature under the sun which I will quite happily pay for.
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