This thread has left me feeling physically ill.... Its brought back the fear and frustration of being smacked myself as a child, and the lack of understanding of why people who love you could treat you in a manor which hurts you. I have smacked my son in pure frustration however sought help and counselling and will always have to live with that regret... To those who say they were smacked but it never hurt them, i would have to wonder what underlying issues it may have caused. I know for myself i have continued relationships where a partner has caused hurt because i was taught at an early age that is how people who love you treat you
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17-06-2012 22:37 #61
17-06-2012 22:37 #62
Theres a fine line between smacking a child amd beating them up. You just have to know your boundaries and know not to cross it. Most people when talking about smacking they imagine an angry parent realising their full force on a child but that is not what its all about.
17-06-2012 22:39 #63
This is where I get confused! So if your child hits someone they get punished ( time out etc) but it's ok for you to hit them - surely that has to mess with a small child's head?
17-06-2012 22:47 #64
It didnt mess with my head.I was smacked not abused, i have really appreciated the way my gran raised me, it taught me a lot of things and her smcking me really did not have any negative impact on me, i just really learned that doing the wrong thing on purpose will always attaract consequences because that was really all the times i was ever smacked when i purposely do something wrong. We talked before and after the smack she never just attacked me without knowing why.
17-06-2012 23:00 #65
I'm glad it didn't effect you but every child will deal with things differently , I suppose as I was never hit , it's hard for me to understand plus the thought of hurting my 19 month old son is foreign to me, I plan on teaching him right from wrong without the use of force, just like my parents did , I see parents smacking their toddlers for hitting other kids in the play ground all the time and I just don't get it
17-06-2012 23:36 #66
Does it really not bother you that you are choosing to punish your child in a way that has been made against the law? Theses laws were written because as a society we have decided that children have rights and IT IS NOT OK TO ABUSE THEM!
Do you actually know how children develop emotionally and the sort of impact this can have on the adults they become ? I implore you to undertake some child studies or at the least parenting courses that explain why his is not ok and what impact it has been proven to have.
It sickens me that there are people that still think it is ok to abuse the power entrusted to them to help raise another life. our children are young and vulnerable and need to be educated not punished. By telling them why they should or should not do something then you are educating them about the behavior already so there is NEVER any reason to use a weapon on a child. By justifying your actions you are only teaching your children that it is ok to use weapons as long as in their mind they can give a reason for it even if it's illegal. this is the same as your child becoming a teen and using a weapon on another person who acted in a way they did not like. this is the lesson you are indirectly teaching your children.
PLEASE STOP! Do some research and open your eyes to the numerous child studies undertaken over the last decade. What your doing is not ok, illegal and a complete breach of the rights of children.
17-06-2012 23:40 #67
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17-06-2012 23:46 #68
My MIL smacked DS when she was babysitting the other night and she smacked our new puppy as well. We don't smack either so I wasn't impressed.
My parents stopped smacking me when I was a 'young adult' about 13.
17-06-2012 23:47 #69
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17-06-2012 23:50 #70
theres a difference between disciplining and abusing. im not abusing my children nor was I abused. just because others are against smacking does not make it the ultimate wrong. Im not ignorant or uneducated, theres always research for anything I can even find you one in support of smacking. like I said my children are not abused I will discipline them as I see fit, if it doesnt work I try something else. I dont spend all day beating them up I have only smacked a couple of times, if it works I stick with it.
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