Smacking - where's the line?

[Hannahly]

I was smacked and i really dont despice it, usually with a tree branch. It never embarassed or huniliated me because it was never in public or with an audience, i was smacked till about 13. My kids get smacked with a wooden spoon for DD and sometines tree branch for DS, it works i have never smacked them more than two occasions for doing the same incident, they always know its coming i tell them no a certain amount of time and then it comes. When i will stop will depend on them.

Wow. That seems extreme to me (I imagining a mum racing outside to rip a tree branch down to whack a naughty kid with). Or do you have a branch inside specifically for that purpose?

[Hers&Hers]

Hannahyl yes there is and they know where it is and its purpose. When i was young my gram used to make us go get it ourselves i suspect soon my kids will be doing that too. I truly never hit them in anger, its discplinary if i find myself angry at them i dont smack them.

[Hannahly]

Hannahyl yes there is and they know where it is and its purpose. When i was young my gram used to make us go get it ourselves i suspect soon my kids will be doing that too. I truly never hit them in anger, its discplinary if i find myself angry at them i dont smack them.

Thanks for responding. I am anti-smacking, but must say I don't think I have winning grades with my discipline efforts. I find it bloody hard work - I'm just not into conflict/screaming etc, but I wonder if my kids have slack discipline because of that.

Tbh I prefer your gram's method of making you fetch your own whacking stick - it is giving everyone time to diffuse the situation and have some 'thinking time' before the disciplinary action is meted out.

[MinkyJ]

Any discipline given in anger won't work.

Im ok with a slap on a nappied bum with a stern no but found I just didnt have cause to do that much. My daughter is seven and it would be more than 4 years since I smacked her. There are many more effective discipline methods I think.

[Hers&Hers]

Hannahyl it really did work, sometimes when i get back she wouldnt smack me because i would have thought through it and well and truly feel sorry for what i did. Just because you use a stick doesnt make it harder than a hand infact a hand could be more painful, neither one of my kids have cried for more than a minute when smacked, they only ever smacked on bum and fully dressed, i dont go all hard on them they never have any marks or bruising and they learn something from it. As i did too.

[Lincolns mummy]

I was smacked and i really dont despice it, usually with a tree branch. It never embarassed or huniliated me because it was never in public or with an audience, i was smacked till about 13. My kids get smacked with a wooden spoon for DD and sometines tree branch for DS, it works i have never smacked them more than two occasions for doing the same incident, they always know its coming i tell them no a certain amount of time and then it comes. When i will stop will depend on them.

Im shocked someone would find this type of punishment ok. Thats abuse. If i saw you do it i would report you to the police.

[ShanandBoc]

I have to say this thread has shocked me. It has made me very uncomftable. Imagine if i went around hitting people with sticks? I cant see how its sets a good example. If i seen a child being hit with a stick i would be very distressed

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[ShanandBoc]

Can i ask hers&hers if ur child hit another child with a stick a) what would you say to them? and b) How would you punish / discipline them?

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[cellent]

I don't know yet what I would do. Probably light smack on clothed bum or on their hand - but not hard, more a firm tap. I guess enough to make sound, but not really hurt. Coupled with a firm "no" or "naughty".

[Hers&Hers]

Shanandboc i dont just get up and smack them when i see them do something wrong, i tell them no, i even use time out/naughty corner. But after several attempts they still do it KNOWING what they are doing is wrong then they get smacked. To answer your question i tell him what he did was wrong, never to do it again and to apologise and he will probably get time out.