As above, do you think on-off relationships can ever work? Like even if you've already broken up, and get back together, can it work? What do you/did you have to change? Thoughts please.
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13-06-2012 20:46 #1
Getting back together, does it ever work?
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13-06-2012 20:52 #2Senior Member
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Good question. Who knows? I sure don't.. my partner and I have broken up several times over 6 years.. I really don't know if it can work but we usually fix some more issues each time .
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13-06-2012 20:57 #3
We weren't exactly on-off, but my DH and I separate ld after a very horrible 2 year relationship. We were separated for a year then decided to give it another try. BEST thing we have ever done. We are happier then ever, got married last November and are about to welcome our third daughter into the world. We have grown so much both as a couple and as individuals and we have realised what our priorities in life need to be. None of that could/would have happened if we hadn't of separated.
13-06-2012 20:58 #4
Yep, absolutely. One of my best friends just got married to the man she first got together with as a bit of a fling in uni, they got back together a few years later, together for 8 years, engaged, called off the wedding but stayed together to work through the issues, and just got married 18 months after the cancelled wedding and she counts her blessings that they've fought so hard to stay together before they even got married, as it meant they went into it with their eyes wide open, and had been right to the brink and decided not to jump, but to stay and fight for their relationship. I think if you're willing to fix what was wrong, the relationship can be much stronger the second time around.
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13-06-2012 21:00 #5
I sure hope so DH and I have been together 13 years this year. We first broke up when he turned 18 for 6 weeks, he was unemployed at the time.
Our 2nd time we broke up was when we were 25, DH decided he didn't want to get married or have kids loved me but thought we should break up. He was again for the 2nd time in his life unemployed. That breakup lasted 10 days. Within two months he had a new job, proposed and we started ttc. Looking back we have come to realise he gets a bit depressed when not working and feels like a faliure. 3 years later and now newlyweds things have never been better.
13-06-2012 21:02 #6
13-06-2012 21:06 #7
Thanks for your replies guys. What if, you'd been with someone 7 years, broke up for a few months, got back together for a few months, and then broke up again, any way you could see that working? I guess some things would have to change, I know we'd take it very slowly third time around...cos I wouldn't want to break up again!
13-06-2012 21:10 #8
13-06-2012 21:14 #9
My DP and I have broken up more times than I can count. We've been together (on and off) for seven years.
Two weeks ago I gave birth to our DD and things are great between us.
Getting back together forces you to deal with the issues that caused you to break up in the first place. If you deal with those issues and work through them, of course the relationship can work.
If you're unsure of the relationship, then counselling can work to help you sort through the issues and decide if they are deal breakers.
13-06-2012 21:14 #10
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