I have 4 children aged 6,4,17 months and 3.5 months!!
I feel like I'm not handling it all to well!! I try the best I can but everything just gets on top of me!!!
I get NO help with the kids from DP what so ever but he goes out all day long and comes home to a chaotic house while in trying to cook dinner with a screaming baby and toddler in toe then gets mad cause the house is chaotic!! Seriously I'm not friggin super women im one person and can only do so much!!!
He gets time to himself whenever he wants it I can't even go to the bloody toilet without the toddler following or the baby crying!!!
Today has just been utter hell, the baby and toddler both have diarrhea and colds so I have done nothin but change soiled nappies and wipe snotty noses all day long and the oldest decides it time to have an attitude and back chats all day while he is out doing what he wants without a care in the world!!!!
It's not fair when is it my turn ?? He thinks that because I wanted them that I'm the only one that needs to have any input!!!
Since when did being a parent become a casual position ???
I have just had the toddler screaming because he has nappy rash from the diarrhea and I'm exhausted im not handling it too well , BUT when I pipe up and say something to him I'm a bad parent cause I can't continue to cope with it!!!! Ummmmmmmm what!!! I have listened to it all day long , not being able to put the baby down cause she just screams and then have a toddler in toe who also wants to be picked up but he comes home has a meal waiting for him and then goes to bed cause he's 'tired' !!!!
Seriously what did u do all day sit on your *** that's what while I ran around like a blue *** fly and your saying your exhausted!!!!
I dont know how much more I can take of this!!!! I feel like I'm failing as a mother because I feel I can't cope with it!!!
If you make it this far through thanks for reading!!!
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10-06-2012 19:46 #1
I feel like I'm not coping vent!!!
10-06-2012 19:56 #2Senior Member
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- Mar 2012
That doesn't sound very fair on you i would be talking to him about that he defiently should be helping you out he sounds very selfish, hope you are ok
10-06-2012 20:00 #3wishes she was a glow worm. A glow worm's never glum, 'cos how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out of your bum?
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
- Under Your Bed
I am so sorry and sending hugs your way. Maybe you need to sit him down and tell him. Not ask or anything just tell and if he gets angry then tell him
He needs to step up or step out. I know that will be hard but you need help and his not doing that. I no exactly how you feel. I ended up leaving without telling an taking the kids. It snapped him out of his stupid stage. He dose have some silliness still but is almost all better. Maybe your man needs a wake up call. Hope ur ok and everyone gets better xxx
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10-06-2012 20:01 #4Senior Member
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- Mar 2010
As a father its his responsibility to chip in. Period. Id be sitting down for a serious chat. Oh and good on you! You sound like an amazing mum who is just doing her best. At times i feel like i cant cope and i only have 1!!! xxx
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11-06-2012 09:22 #5
You have 4 kids under 6. You are amazing. Seriously.
As for your DP! How selfish of him to not help you out. Parenting is a 24 hour gig for BOTH parents. I'm not sure how to approach this with him but you certianly have every right to feel upset and angry about it.
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11-06-2012 09:27 #6
I have NOTHING positive or even remotely nice to say about your DH so I'm going to give you and suggest you sit down and talk to him, DEMAND more from him. He is a FATHER and he does not have the right to shirt his responsibilities.
11-06-2012 11:12 #7
Guys like that make me furious. It sounds like you actually had 5 children under 6.
What an immature, selfish brat. Tell him to start helping with the children HE created with you. Shirking responsibility is just low.
I am sorry you are putting up with this.
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11-06-2012 11:32 #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2010
Perhaps he is not coping either, hence he is distancing himself? (not that it's right, just putting it out there to be considered).
If you are sure he will not say yes to helping around the house, try stating, 'for $60 per week/fortnight, we are going to have a cleaner come in and do the basic cleaning. It is due to your lack of help, this expense is required'.
Or hire a nanny/baby sitter to come by once a week for a few hours to give you a break.
1. To have 4 children so young, you are amazing.
2. To recognise you are perhaps not coping the best is again an admirable feat.
It takes a strong woman to do one of the above, let alone both!
Perhaps to make things easier, you could just pop a jar of baby food on the table in front of hubby when he gets home, saying 'Seem's like I have 5 babies to take care of today' or something just as passive aggressive lol.
Is his lack of interest a recent thing or has he always been like this?
11-06-2012 11:43 #9
OP you are not failing as a mother, your partner is failing at supporting you. TBH honest I don't know how you do it. You sound like superwoman to me!! You are doing a great job by the sounds of it, and you are handling it, but you need some more support. Do you have anyone you can reach out to for some support?
11-06-2012 17:12 #10
Thanks everyone im only after support from him it's not too much to ask!!!
Gonna have a serious chat later when all kids are asleep!!
Thankyou for all your kind words!! I'm far from superwoman lol!!! I just do my best as each day comes!! I'm sure once bub is a bit older that things will get easier!!
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