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  1. #1
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    Default Why is he so all over the place? Doing my head in...

    Dp is being a PITA.

    Lately, he seems to get grumpy so easily. He got angry with me when I said a friend's birthday was coming up and I'd be going out. Banged on about my priorities not being right, etc.

    Then yesterday I picked up a layby. In it were 2 pairs of new shoes. Just cheap target ones and not even dressy ones but just casual flats that I can wear all the time. He saw them and asks, "oh, so another pair of new shoes huh?" with an unimpressed tone. Yes, actually. And they took me 8 week to pay them off, (pair of pants in the layby too) so stfu.

    Then last night we were at his parents. We were sitting on the couch and I had my hand resting on his leg. He pushed it off. I thought he was messing around but no, he was actually sulking. Before this he was fine but just got the sulks in an instant. I have no idea what it was I might have done to annoy him... If he has a reason he won't share it with me.

    Then last night I fell asleep on the couch watching tv and when he woke me to go to bed I was half asleep but moving from a warm couch to a freezing bed... And I kept my uggs on. He made some comment and I said I was cold and would take then off once I warmed up. He got out of bed in a huff and slept on the couch. Yes, because I didn't take off my uggs when he mentioned it. Apparently whenever he put his feet near me they felt annoying. I told him he Should have just kept them away then.

    Then this morning I was woken but him pushing my hip with his foot ad saying, "get up." he then told me to go get dressed. Wtf?! Don't talk to me like that!

    It seems like he's getting angry at me randomly for pretty much nothing. Now today he's trying to pretend like nothing ever happened but now I'm grumpy because of him being a jerk.

    I have no idea wtf he's being a grumpy jerk for. Or why he thinks it's okay to treat me like that.

    This is more of a vent than anything. This behaviour is not usual for him and normally he's quite nice but this is just ridiculous.

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    Q: do you think maybe he is depressed? Or something else is going on stressing him out that he is just taking out on you?

    This was the case for me and DF - he went from the nicest guy on earth to the biggest jerk ever - turns out work is stressing him out but instead of leaving it at work he was bringing it home for all of us to deal with.

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    Is he still working away from home?

    Perhaps he's getting a little used to living away by himself

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    Is it possible his taking drugs an you dont know

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    Thanks for reading guys. He's on meds for anxiety ax depression so unless he's stopped taking them he should be fine.

    He's been living at home for about 3 months now and one of those months he did absolutely nothing so he has had time off to himself doing sweet f all.

    I might see if he's taking his medication and if he's not that might indicate what's going on. Regardless though, it makes me want to go stay with my mum overnight just to avoid him. Though that will probably just make him more angry...

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    Hi Sassy.

    So this was an one-off, or have you noticed a change in him lately? If it was an one-off, he might just have had one of those days, and *one* particular thing you might have done (without you realising) might have set him off. It doesn't excuse his behaviour though, and I would definitely bring it up with him today, as you deserve to know, and so that you don't end up reciprocating his behaviour.

    If you feel like there is more to his behaviour than just yesterday being a bad day for him, could it be that he is feeling a bit "threatened" (in lack of a better word) with your magnificent weight loss? As in, that he might have noticed changes in you that makes you feel a bit "foreign" to him? Your DP sounds like a really lovely and supportive partner, and I am sure that he is very supportive of your weight loss and positive lifestyle changes, but it might just take him some time to come to terms with it all.

    Sorry, that was my little Freud moment for today. I'm probably far off!

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    Lol pp... He is so anti drugs I doubt that.

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    Is he still into the relationship? Maybe ask him, sounds like he is easily annoyed. Thats how I knew my last relationship was over, everything I did annoyed him.

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    Have you noticed a theme with the things that trigger it, eg. going out by yourself and buying shoes?

    that made me think of a couple of things -

    - he could be resentful of you spending money, particularly if he's the sole income earner?

    - he could be threatened that you're dressing up, losing weight and doing things by yourself?

    Is he willing to talk about what is motivating his anger?

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    I don't know when it began... He had his moments and so do I but this ongoing cranky pants stuff is really recent.

    I just checked and he's still taking his meds... So it's not that.

    He just shrugs at everything and blamed it all on me wearing my slippers in bed but that surely can't be it cos it began before that.

    He might be annoyed about money yt he wastes it on more things than I do and I need a new wardrobe because last winter I was plus sized and can't wear that stuff anymore. I'm not even buying lots... I'm actually being really cheap in my spending. Like 2 cardis for 20. Not the $70 ones I actually want.

    And no doubt he was angry I slept in but I've been sick... And took some cold and flu meds which knock me out a bit so I slept longer than normal. It's not like he had to take care of dd or anything though cos she does her own thing anyway and gets herself breakfast and stuff.

    And tbh, if I want to sleep in on a Sunday, I should bloody well be able to. I have to leave the house at 6.30 3 days a week and when he gets up even earlier he wakes me up and annoys me so many mornings I'm up from 5 and not home again until 6.30 at night. So I want my bloody sleep in.

    Now he's just sulking on the couch. At his parents. Again. I had to drive him over here cos they're working on his car here... And I've been just sitting here being ignored for hours. So over this crap.


 

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