I am just not meant to BF. I've typed this thread 2 TIMES now already and my PC won't let it upload. SO here's for the third time lucky.
My boy was 5 weeks prem and spent 2 weeks in special care being tube fed then bottle fed EBM. Since coming home a week ago we've been expressing and bottle feeding and trying to BF as well.
I've seen 2 LC's who've told me I'm doing everything right. Despite this I am in AGONY and my nipples feel like they're on fire. I cry every time I feed him and I dread it and I hate myself for that. Not sure if this is because my nipples are already damaged but what else can I do? Everyone says not to bottle feed as it causes nipple confusion and perhaps that's the problem but he's so keen to BF and feeds for about 40 mins and sleeps between 3-4 hours each time.
I just don't know what to do, I'm so afraid to feed him next time. I actually cry out in pain and it's distressing my 3 and 4 year old daughters. My son of course must be picking up on my acute discomfort and I'm concerned it will affect my let down and supply.
I'm at a loss. What an EPIC failure I am.
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07-06-2012 11:11 #1Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2010
About to give up, in agony and devestated.
07-06-2012 11:13 #2
have u tried a nipple shield?
07-06-2012 11:18 #3Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2010
I do have one but the last LC I saw advised not to use them as they can affect your supply? I'm also worried as it won't resolve the problem, it just seems like a band aid for a few days then we're back to sqaure one again with me having no idea what I'm doing wrong???
07-06-2012 11:23 #4
An ok what about a tongue tie?
I know there are supplements that can help with pain do you have assess to a naturopath?
07-06-2012 11:23 #5
You are in no way a failure! My sis had the same dilemma and used a nipple shield, she went on to breast feed using the shield every feed till he was 1.
07-06-2012 11:42 #6
You aren't a failure!! I also blamed myself for not being able to bf with my first daughter, I tried everything and all I ended up with was sore boobs, a hungry baby, me exhausted and feeling like the biggest failure too. Sometimes it doesn't work - end of story. It's heartbreaking but if you are unhappy and you've done all you can, just bottle feed - formula is there for a reason but baby will be better off with a happy mummy
07-06-2012 11:45 #7
Ultimately though you need to do what feels right to you. You ARE NOT a failure if you decide not to breast feed.
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07-06-2012 11:55 #8
I used a nipple shield from day 5 of breast feeding as my nipples were severely damaged from poor latching due to tongue tie. My supply was never affected and although I no longer use them (DS is now 9 months) I was using them every feed for quite a while. I used the medela ones.
Before I tried them (suggested by a LC) I used to dread feeding as the pain was unbelievable. Maybe it's something you could try - at least to get some relief for a few feeds while you work out what is causing the pain?
Wishing you the best :-)
07-06-2012 11:55 #9
Seriously if you want to keep feeding give the nipple shield a go It can be used for a week till your nipples recover or throughout your whole breastfeeding journey.
My lactation consultant said that recent research has shown that nipple shields have no affect on your supply. Maybe your supply will be fine. I stressed about that too.
I used nipple shields for about a week due to excrutiating pain. Ultimately I stopped using them because my bub wasn't good at getting milk while using them.
Last edited by LibranTwin; 07-06-2012 at 12:03.
07-06-2012 11:56 #10Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
I was exactly the same, I was in so much pain my partner would have to leave the room as he was so upset seeing me like that. Rite aide Hydrogel breast pads saved me, you can put them in the fridge and they provide instant relief and help to heal in between feeds.
One thing I found hard was knowing if I was doing it right as my nipples were so damaged it hurt all the time, so when i went to a LC I took the advise and also alternated between expressing and BF so I could heal and then I could feel if I was making them worse or not.
I found I really have to hold DD and my breast for the entire feed, it is not the best for general comfort BUT I have no pain.
If you need someone to talk to feel free to pm me, I know how hard it is and I almost gave up myself ( and no one will think badly if you decide you cant do it ) but i am happy to say DD is almost 4 months and I am still BF
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