Down time, yeah....
After beings a working mother for 11 years regular down time becomes a necessity. I didn't have kids to be rid of them either, but I am first and foremost an individual and a person and I need time to recharge my batteries and regain perspective - and that includeds being away from work as well.
I need down time where what I do - even for 5 minutes - is my choice.
At work the phone rings, people want information, bills to pay, invoices to raise etc etc - it's not down time at all for as much as not 'mothering' time.
Even going for a walk isn't really 'down' time but it's great for clearing my head.
Im not working Fridays at the moment so I have the chance for a bit more me time ATM and I revel in the time where no one is asking/wanting something off me. I mute my mobile, knowing that the school will ring MOTH if they can't get me. I read, relax, get ahead with some of the weekend duties.
I have had a weekend away with a bunch of brilliant women, I spend a day once a month with my sister (and Nooooooo kids). I was going to Pilates once a week, but have had to shelve that until I start working Fridays again.
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04-06-2012 20:26 #21Senior Member
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04-06-2012 20:27 #22
I finally gave up and hired a cleaner. It's money well spent!!
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04-06-2012 20:43 #23
I have been thinking about doing this. Especially when I go back to doing uni. Working the four days at the moment I am just not sure when I am going to fit it in. I don't think I can leave all my study for the weekends the children go to their fathers
04-06-2012 20:48 #24
When i have time off from work these days, i prefer to just sit and relax if i can. I fibd my job really full on and as long as the house is tidy i am happy.
My down time now usually consists of me just doing school drop off, coming home and having a sleep as i am up early most mornings and i get tired from doing them so much. I then use after school care or one of the school mums so DS will have a play til about 5pm.
If i have running around to do, i cram it all into the one day so its all done and i dont need to worry about doing it days later.
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04-06-2012 21:23 #25
I am reasonable about what I expect from myself. If I'm exhausted and need a 30 minute lie on the couch but there is a sink full of dirty dishes - the couch wins. I'm no super hero, just a mum trying to keep it all together, and that includes keeping ME functional.
Usually after DD is in bed I give myself 20 minutes to do things like dishes, clean out lunch box, get school uniform ready for the next day, put on a load of washing, and that's it. Then I crash on the couch.
When I arrive at work I ease into it with a cup of tea, a bowl of cereal and read the paper online. One of the good parts of having a desk job - I know not everyone can do that.
I have a cleaner as nothing was ever really clean otherwise. I actually do more now that I have a cleaner as I have to tidy once a fortnight before she comes!
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River Song (04-06-2012)
04-06-2012 21:40 #26Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2008
- Padbury, Perth
I run around like a crazy woman on my day off to do the groceries with both kids. I go to Coles because they have the double trolley where both can sit. DS is getting a bit big but he stays in the trolley and sits on a Carton of coke.
I make a list for groceries and a list of what I need to do today ie if I need to buy presents or linen or random stuff out of the ordinary. I bribe DS with the iPhone and treats when we go out to the shops.
I 'tidy' the house when the kids are asleep. I have lowered my standards - but hoping to get a cleaner in because I am over it.
I try and cook up a batch of mince and a lasagne on my days off to have for DSs quick meals.
Hair and beauty appointments I make when DH or my mum can look after the kids. Doctors appointments the kids come. During my lunch break at work I do 'personal' shopping for clothes/shoes etc
I occasionally get crazy at my DH and rant and rave so he (temporarily) helps around the house.
Any 'down time' is when the kids are asleep.
04-06-2012 21:46 #27Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2009
Down time????? What the hell is that???? I have a 2 year old and an almost 1 year old, I nurse full time in a busy emergency department- work is no break and to minimise child care costs they only go 2 days a week and I work nights and weekends to keep my hours at 40. I take my girls to my OB appts, pap smears, bank appts, everything, and me time.... I haven't cut or coloured my hair in nearly 3 years, I don't leave them except for work. It's hard but I chose to have kids. Every job we do we sing, play games, dance etc to make it fun (yes I do get odd looks at the supermarket). I have a lovely husband who is very supportive but also works full time. Me time will come once they grow up.
04-06-2012 21:57 #28Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2008
What Lh said. I do everything with kids in tow.. my mum always worked full time and she took us everywhere such as the bank, post office, shops.. so I just had that as my example and no other way occurred to me.. cleaning.. well I do it when the kids are asleep if its particularly time consuming like folding laundry.. I also clean as I go and ds 4 does help a bit.. and we dedicate a large amount of the weekend to "family time" and housework. I dunno it all works.somehow. in terms of down time I get very little but the kids both are asleep between 7 and 8. Then dd will sleep about 2 or so hours before needing a feed and I use that few hours in the evening to watch trash tv or read after a quick tidy up. Unfortunately my parents and in laws are not able to take the kids for very long but mum will take the kids for a few hours on the weekend sometimes.
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04-06-2012 22:30 #29
I don't work.
I had a second kid quickly so it could amuse the first one, I have a cleaner who comes weekly and does the real cleaning, I just vacuum and mop as needed and do washing and dishes (all relatively easy with little kids). I take my kids to playgroups to socialise them (and me!) and do lots of educational activities at home. I book my appointments around my husbands work schedule where I can and begrudgingly take them with me if I can't.
04-06-2012 22:43 #30
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