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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by bumMum View Post
    Once your children start making you look old!!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Theophania View Post
    I had DS at 23 and DD at 24, the only time I noticed this was when I went to a mothers group and there was a massive age divide. I was the only one there under about 33 and I felt very judged by the older mothers. They too had just had their first but treated my like I knew nothing. I was very frustrated, because as far as I am concerned I had my children at a really good age, I didn't think I was a young mum at all...
    We too had a big age group in our mothers group, ranging from 19 to 38. I didn't (and don't ) 'judge' the young mums nor think any less of them at all - but there is a noticable pattern of difference in parenting ideas, fasion, music, relationships etc between the 'younger' and 'older' mums. Perhaps it's an age thing, they're not really judging but not really relating at the same time? Just a thought.

  3. #13
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    NEVER! I fell pregnant at 18 and since then it hasnt stopped- my child is now 7 and I still get asked for ID etc.. as I look younger than 26 now we deal with school friends motehrs who are the same age as MY mother is right now....

  4. #14
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    I'm 27 28 in 3 months with a 7 month old and I get all sorts of stares particularly from older women who give me a disapproving look, I do look younger than my age but that doesn't bother me one bit anymore it's taken a while to accept it but I'm used to it now. I'm just sick of all the judgemental people out there who think because you look young you are young!!! Oh well on the plus side when I'm 30 I'll look 25 maybe

  5. #15
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    I was just 19 when I had ds and almost 21.5 when I had dd.

    At first I got lots of negative comments. But now they have stopped (23 last Feb) I wear wedding rings which I didn't before not sure if that helps. I seem to have an older attitude on life and I dress rather smart and sophisticated. People are shocked when I reveal my true age. They all say they think I am 25/26 but by this time they have learnt that we have owned 2 houses (well the bank but we own a huge chunk of it) and have done really well.

    I have given them no reason to think I am incapable of making mature decisions and raise my children in a good healthy way.

    I honestly think the looks changed when I turned 22. Strangely. Most of my friends are in their 30's and 40's.
    I just moved to a country town from the city 4 weeks ago and it's much more accepted here aswell. Most of the older generation were young parents and the town is mostly of the older generation.
    Last edited by 1CrazyMoose; 30-05-2012 at 16:49.

  6. #16
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    I am one who looks at people say under 20 who have kids..but mainly coz I myself would never have imagined being able to, or want to do the baby thing at that age..

    Some might be looking, thinking the same thing?..

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    Quote Originally Posted by Theophania View Post
    I had DS at 23 and DD at 24, the only time I noticed this was when I went to a mothers group and there was a massive age divide. I was the only one there under about 33 and I felt very judged by the older mothers. They too had just had their first but treated my like I knew nothing. I was very frustrated, because as far as I am concerned I had my children at a really good age, I didn't think I was a young mum at all...
    How sad I was one of the oldies in my mg (@29) ... One of the girls was 18 ... I never looked down on her or like I knew more about patenting than her (we had been parents the same amount of time!). But when it came to things like study, work, general worldly stuff she would regularly ask my opinion - I was always happy to share (not force it on her). Gee I hope this comes out the right way lol ... But she is one of my closest friends now.

    Op - I'm clearly not a young mum but seriously screw anyone who is going to make a judgement on your parenting abilities because of your age.

  8. #18
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    The only way you can avoid 'young parent' judgement is by not becoming a young parent.

    There's valid reasons why young parents are looked down on, and it's just a fact of life that won't easily slide from society.

  9. #19
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    I was 17 when I fell pregnant with DD1. I had the occasional comment but nothing too bad. She is in school now and I got invited to a mother group where most the mothers are around 40. They were surprised when they found out my age but didn't kick me out so I presume they still like me

    I notice though if I go out without the girls and tell people I have kids they are shocked. And then when I say their ages they are more shocked. But when I have the kids with me people presume I am older...

  10. #20
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    I don't think the judgement ever stops. People will always did something to judge, whether it's you are too young, too old, too tall, too short.... There will always be something.

    I was 18 when I had my first and during the pregnancy didn't find much judgment (at least not to my face) but after her birth apparently I was fair game. I had my second at 21 and was judged for having 2 so young. I was also a foster mother to 3 others at the time ranging from 9 to 13.
    I am now 24, married and pregnant with our third and this is by far the worst of the judgment. I get all sorts of questions from my age to how many I have already to do they all have the same father....


 

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