So happy there is a section here as this has been on my mind a lot lately as we have been hitting the job search very rigorously. I think my DH (refrigeration mechanic) might be on the cusp of landing a FIFO job. He has his pre-employment medical on Thursday.
We are expecting our second child in just over four weeks so I am a little concerned how I will manage. My DH is an unbelievable help around the house. He does all the laundry, gardens, vacuuming, dishes and helps with DD. So stressed about coping on my own. The job he the pre-employment medical is 3/2 or 4/1 nothing confirmed.
I was wondering if any of you have any tips for me on getting through it. I am very routine. I thought maybe getting a uni student in from 4-7 to help with the afternoons.
Any tips would be super useful especially if you have managed with a newborn. My mum did say she would help but she does my head in, not sure that is a wise option.
Thanks for your time.
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22-05-2012 15:06 #1
FIFO Partner - What helps get you through it?
23-05-2012 22:19 #2
My dh went to the mines when dd was 3 months old so I can shed a little light on it! His first stint was 3 weeks on 1 back, then 2 on 1 off then 7 on 7 off so we've done a few different ones! Is there any way your dh can find a roster that is a bit more family friendly? The one thing I hated about him being away for 2 or more weeks at a time was that dd was changing so much every day and when he came home it took a while for her to get used to him and by the time she did, he was flying out again. It doesn't work for everyone. We just had a break from it and we're just looking at a more family friendly roster 5/4/4/5 so he's not away as much. definitely make sure you use the support you have around you. My mum was a massive help even just when you have those days that bub won't let you put them down! If it wasn't for her, I probably wouldn't have showered much!!
The Following User Says Thank You to wannaBamumma For This Useful Post:
23-05-2012 23:21 #3
Thanks so much. We r worried about the roster. It's hard to find week on week off work. Going to see what happens and keep looking/applying.
23-05-2012 23:41 #4
I only have one DD who was 4 weeks when my DP left to go back to FIFO. He works 2 weeks on and 1 off. We use Skype alot. And recently I have got DP to take photos of his room, work mates, food, anything to do with his work away and I have put them all in a photo album so DD and I can read stories about what dads doing. Also there are some really cool books around in news agency's that allow you to record a voice reading the story. So DP still reads to her at night even though he wasn't there.
I was really lucky to have my family around so if I was really stuck or tired they could help.
I would also recommend seeing if there any FIFO playgroups around your area. Helps to know others that know what it's like.
Hope some of this may help.
The Following User Says Thank You to Ash1202 For This Useful Post:
24-05-2012 03:44 #5
My DH has been doing FIFO for over 3 years now so was used to it while on my own but having our first bub back in January added a new dimension to it!
His rosters have been a bit all over the place recently (starting a new job) so there hasn't been much consistency with how long he's home and how long he's away for which is annoying.
I find it good to be able to count down to when he is home (as it gives me something to look forward to).
We use Skype or speak on the phone (when he has reception) every day.
I send him lots of photos of our DS so that he doesn't feel like he is missing out completely and he really appreciates this.
If he has stayed FIFO by the time your bub arrives hopefully he can have some time off with you to help out and to bond with the new bub. DH had the first 6 weeks off which was amazing! I had a Caesar so it was great to have him home to do all the things I couldn't plus it really gave him a chance to be a hands on dad.
When he is away I just take it one day at a time. I don't have a strict routine (this doesn't work for me and bub) so go with the flow. I do try and have things planned to keep myself busy and try to get out of the house at least 3-4 times a week to keep myself sane (ie mothers group, play group, shopping, visit family etc).
Having meals in the freezer helps as sometimes without an extra pair of hands around dinner time I find it's almost impossible to prepare food. I am lucky my parents live up the road and I eat with them a few nights a week which is a big help!
I do find that the first day or 2 after DH goes back to work is the hardest. I just start getting used to having him around and then he's gone again! But then I slip back into the groove of doing it on my own and all is ok.
Feel free to PM me if you want to talk further or have any other questions.
24-05-2012 16:24 #6
My DH has been working away for about 3-4 years now. Started when we had a 1-2 year old, which was hard for her to adapt to, since before that he'd been the stay at home daddy while I worked. It is hard being pregnant and/or having a little baby with hubby not home, but soon enough you'll get used to it.
DH very nearly missed the birth of DD2. He managed to get home at about 10am, and she was born 4 hours later. The kids and I talk to him most nights, although sometimes he doesn't have reception for up to 2 weeks at a time. (Works 5 on 5 off, offshore).
I'm pregnant again currently, which either means I'm crazy, or it's not too bad... you have to get used to it though. The first couple of swings after bub is born will probably feel horrible for both of you. He will miss bub (and you of course), you will probably find that you never have a minute of peace. I recommend taking your mum up on her offer, and anyone else who wants to help out. They may drive you nuts now, but when they offer to hold bub for half an hour so you can shower, brush your teeth and hair, etc in peace... you will love them forever!
Also, in the lead up I made heaps of food and froze it in portions in those take-away type containers. Good to do while DH is home so you have more time... and he has to help with dishes! But then on the nights when you're exhausted, can't be stuffed etc you can just microwave it - and if you want to be really bad, toss the container instead of washing it.
My best advice is, take it as it comes. You may find a strict routine works best for you and bub, or you may find letting bub lead a bit on bedtimes/feedings/etc works better. Hopefully your 3 year old will adapt well, and your new family will make you very happy.
The Following User Says Thank You to Psylent For This Useful Post:
24-05-2012 16:30 #7
Subscribing as my DH does FIFO and we have our first due in Aug.
24-05-2012 16:44 #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2012
My dh is a long distance road train driver and comes home on average 3 days a month. I work as a part time surgical nurse. I manage, some days are more hectic than others and 'stuff' gets done later than it probably should, like lawn mowing etc.....
It been harder the last few months as I'm tired and icky from being pregnant and my oldest is in year 12 so not really available to help as much
To be honest my day starts at 5am and finishes around 10:30pm do it's a lot, but another 2 years of this and our home is paid for
24-05-2012 23:48 #9
25-05-2012 17:08 #10Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2012
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