I understand totally. I always get people, when I say that my DH has no sperm, then trying to tell me how you never know, it could just happen. Their husband had low sperm count & it still happened, etc etc. Ummm, a world expert in the field has literally cut open DH's balls, and searched through every bit of them with a microscope & couldn't find a single sperm. But sure, it might just happen naturally .... because it did for you. I know people mean well, but they really seem to have trouble grasping that not everybody has the same situation.
+ Reply to Thread
Results 171 to 180 of 345
04-08-2012 08:17 #171
04-08-2012 09:11 #172
So I haven't started IVF yet, but I will need to in future for any more children.
A little while back I was discussing needing IVF, and this person was saying that I shouldn't worry about it, that I'm young and will fall pregnant naturally when my body is ready to, that I shouldn't have any problems with it. Especially since I already have one child.
Errr....I don't think so! Considering I only have one tube which is completely blocked, and I haven't fallen pregnant naturally within the last 4 years of it being diagnosed, I highly doubt that it's going to happen!!
05-08-2012 08:46 #173
I got my ultimate clanger last week - was telling someone that it looked like we wouldn't have any embies to test (we are doing CGD) and got "Oh well maybe it's [ie us having a baby] just not meant to be."
OMG! I could not think of a less supportive comment! Best part? The person who said it was my MUM. Way to go mum. Cheers for that.
05-08-2012 09:10 #174Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2008
Oh Tiggerfields that's terrible!!!!
I think sometimes people just say these things to make themselves feel better.
For example: Last night I was talking with my neighbour (who has been trying herslef for 8 months and knows that we have struggled with IVF) says "Did you know about this jelly stuff that comes out of you?" No ive been TTC for 6 years and I didnt - Really?!!! And then she says "Oh I know heaps of people that have fallen after stopping IVF, don't worry it will happen for you, you just never know!" Um yes I do know it wont happen for us naturally for us, over $20000 and two different FS proves that it wont! Then she went on to say "Ooooo we will be pregnant together and we can have a mummies group!" Way to make me feel even worse, while all the other women in my street get together for a coffee and children play date I will just sit at home and be the sad childess women alone...great...
My all time favourite is ...'Why don't you just adopt?" If it was that easy don;t you think we would have already?!
I think some people are scared to really know how it feels to go through this hell and they just use the default lines to make themselves feel like they have helped us in some way. If we told them how we really felt they would probably run for the hills screaming!!!
05-08-2012 09:35 #175
All these make me so grateful we didn't tell anyone til we got our BFP. My heart breaks for you all...our journeys are hard enough without all the useless "advice". Even now most of Dh's family don't know. We preferred the "are you too selfish to have kids?" and "tick tock tick tock" comments to all their potential expert Ivf advice.
Hugs to you all.
05-08-2012 10:19 #176
05-08-2012 14:07 #177
I've heard heaps of annoying and hurtful things, but my most hated would have to be the 'friend of a friend' stories.
Sorry, but until it happens to me, I will remain a bitter old K'iesha
06-08-2012 17:47 #178Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2012
This thread is hilarious. We frequently get, 'just relax and it will happen' hmmm, we're lesbians and neither of us have penises so it's actually not just going to happen! Or worse, from my dad who can't fathom the money we're spending, 'why don't you just go to the local footy club after a grand final and find a good looking young lad', hmmmm because we're lesbians, and that would be wrong!
The Following User Says Thank You to jaandaw For This Useful Post:
06-08-2012 23:18 #179
I particularly hate the "why don't you just go to a nightclub?" Do they think I didn't try that? Must I pay the price of being deemed unloveable by every date I've ever had and have to hear their thoughtless stupidity as well? I've now started answering that by asking them if they really think it's a good idea. Then I can watch them be ashamed of themselves. Never failed yet.
The adoption thing annoys me as well.
07-08-2012 20:50 #180
I have really enjoyed reading all the posts, cheers ladies
I had my best friend mother keep "shhhhhhing" me one day when we were talking about IVF, said I would freak my self out of having a baby....... Hmmmmmmm
By scarymarygoldfish in forum Games & fun stuffReplies: 61Last Post: 24-02-2013, 11:27
By Zombie_eyes in forum General ChatReplies: 138Last Post: 21-01-2013, 23:30
By GlitterFarts in forum Pregnancy & Birth General ChatReplies: 7Last Post: 03-10-2012, 08:30
Sarah Tooke Childbirth & Parenting EducationProviding private, personalised antenatal childbirth & parenting education to expectant parents in the comfort of their ...
LATESTWhy it is OK for your child to be differentWhat is a blessing way? How is it different to a baby shower?7 ways to break the ‘mumnotony’ at home
POPULARWhen can I start giving chores to my children?New baby nursery checklist – a guide to newborn essentialsWhat to pack for labour and hospital – a checklist
FORUMS - chatting now ...
HGC lelvelsConception & Fertility General Chat
ongoing chat threadGeneral Chat
April/May TTC group chatConception & Fertility General Chat
Bbt chart thread #8Conception & Fertility General Chat
Albert?Choosing Baby Names
Miracle March TTC and Testing ChatConception & Fertility General Chat
Falling pregnant a few months after giving birthGeneral Chat