My DH is adamant that he only wants the one (he was adamant before she was born as well, though). I'm just going to bide my time and wait and see what he thinks when DD is a bit older.
And to be honest, somedays I think I don't want another baby. As much as I love my gorgeous little girl, I wonder how I'd cope with another one.
As for your DH, maybe get him involved a bit more in the parenting? Looking after DS for longer periods of time, while you go for a walk around the block etc? Or looking after him while you are in another room. Just a thought. I have heard that some Dads feel more comfortable with their kids as they get older.
As for the have another baby issue, I'd just wait it out for now.
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14-05-2012 21:24 #11
14-05-2012 21:35 #12
I suffered severe PND after our DD1 was born, to the point I tried to end both our lives on more he. One occasion. I was heavily medicated and had psychologists come to my house daily. My DH (DP at the time) did nothing to help and it was pretty much a living hell. We split for 12 months and when we got back together, we started talking about having more children. We were together 3 months when I found out I was pregnant again and he was adamant I should have a termination. We were still working through a lot of issues, we had just had his 2 littles sisters and brother out into our care and we were only living on his traineeship wage ( less then 800 a fortnight). I stood my ground and said I will be going through with the pregnancy and now our DD2 is almost. 2 and the apple of her dads eye. Hubby was worried about how I'd cope given how bad I was after DD1 but it was complete opposite. I swore black and blue After DD2 was born that I didn't want another, but hubby did. By the time I had changed my mind, hubby had decided he was happy with his 2 girls and didn't want another. It took about 6 months of talking to finally agree that we both wanted one more and so now we are pregnant with our third daughter.
Give it time. You have both been through a lot.
14-05-2012 21:47 #13
My hubby was much the same as yours. Always said he only wanted one child and no matter how much I used to sayi wanted another he always said no. One day he saw me with my godson who was 6 months old at the time (our DD was 4.5 at this stage) and pulled me aside and said "you want to have another baby don't you" and it just sort of went from there. It still took another 2 years before we officially started trying but our DS is now 6 moths old. Yeah, we have a big gap between the 2 (7 years) but I wouldn't change it for the world. Just give him some time to come around
14-05-2012 22:45 #14
I am in a similar situation. While I currently have no kids Dh is adament he only wants one. Kind of peeved as before.marriage he was ok with 4 or more and wanted to start early in relationship we just never got around to it. We are working on ttc #1 and I an always hopeful he will turn to goo and want more, I will be happy with 1
Sent from a Galaxy far far away
15-05-2012 08:26 #15
Thanks everyone for your heartfelt and thoughtful replies.
Time time time. I know I should give him time, its just so hard because I am so excited! I just want to know how long I have to wait for.
I love my DS he is definantly the best thing I have ever done. I just want my husband to feel the same way.
We always talked about lots of kids and close togther. I guess I threw a spanner into the works by getting PND and he has thrown the spanner by saying no more.
So here goes.
Time time time time........
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