Ok so Im soo clucky atm but deep down I know right now we would prob struggle with 2 kids. So let me hear the things u can do with one and maybe cant or find it hard to do with 2. Let me hear the positive of a one child family!
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11-05-2012 04:37 #1
Positives for a one child family??
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11-05-2012 04:44 #2
Oh I am in the same boat! Extremely clucky but our current situation only allows me to meet ours and DD's needs for now, and I'm not sure having a second would be worth the struggle, although I'd love for them to be close in age...
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11-05-2012 04:56 #3
i have two under two and am often unable to take them anywhere unless i have someone with me. If it was just one child i could take them wherever i wanted. I know when they get older this will change, but at the moment miss almost 2 wants to run around everywhere and master 8 months has to sit in the pram - so it can be hard to manage both without a tantrum.
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11-05-2012 05:11 #4Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2008
I have one and am happy with it. There was a time we were thinking of having 2 but life didn't turn out that way. Now we have decided to have 1, although a part of me is a little sad not to meet that other little person, I kinda feel like I dodged a bullet. I find parenting very difficult and tiring as I have a beautiful but spirited boy
Also, my parents live interstate and DH family is in Ireland, if we have another we will hardly see our families.
We can afford to give him swimming lessons and other lessons too. When he's older we won't spend all our time driving all these kids around
This sounds selfish but I can spend more time with me. I was an older mum so I guess that is still important to me.
I know there are many benefits of having more than one child, but as this is a thread asking for the benefits of just 1 then this is my 2 cents worth.
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11-05-2012 06:36 #5
I am currently pregnant for the first time after a long struggle to have babies, so due to our ages we will probably only have one also. I teach 17 year olds and have a few single children in my class and I had a discussion with them about this. Positives were the undivided attention and support, they all seemed very responsible and smart, and hard working. They did mention though that it meant there was never anyone else to deflect the attention from them so whilst they loved the undivided attention they said they sometimes felt a bit pressured to achieve or be good. So that is something to be aware of I guess, ensuring they get a a bit of space and that we cut them some slack occasionally!
I have found these kids to be very stable and caring, kind and generous.
I think it means we can really give them our love and time, which with a few kids is much harder to do!
Let the cards fall how they fall, and whatever happens just be the best parent you can be! That's my plan!
11-05-2012 06:51 #6Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2012
Positives of a one child family..
-Easy to go out for dinner, shops etc
-No sibling rivalry !!
-Can afford to do more for that child
-Dont have to worry about all the children having conflicting sport/activity schedules.
-Can afford nice holidays.
- Child has your undivided attention, more time for you to help with homework and reading etc
- You can help out with your child's school excursions and school camps.
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11-05-2012 06:51 #7
Pros for a one child family:
- You can keep your adorably cute small car!
- Grocery bills are not 3/4s of your weekly pay
- Family passes usually consist of 2 adults and 2 kids so if you have another mummy friend with 1 kid you can both go together for cheap
- You dont have to worry about finding money for 2,3,4x christmas/birthday presents which means more money for family holidays or nice stuff for the house
- School fees. Do I need to say anymore!
- I read somewhere that children with no siblings have greater confidence, better relationships with their parents/sposes and appreciate their friends more. Not sure if I 100% agree with them but theoretically i can see the sense.
- Once you've gotten through the sleepless nights you never have to worry about them again
There are tons of pros for only having one child and tons for having more than one. Ultimately its which situation fits you and your little family best. Maybe you could get a puppy to curb the cluckiness and 'omg soooo cute!' urges?
11-05-2012 07:01 #8
I have one child. I live with my parents and my sister who has 2 kids. I use to really want another child, but after living with my sister- I'm not so sure now.
It may be due to parenting, or the kids personalities, or the number- I'm not sure. I'm just glad I have only 1 to concentrate on. My sister has difficulty getting the kids to bed before 11pm, there are ALWAYS fights at the dinner table. DS may raise the question but I have the time (and patience) to discuss and explain.
Holidays are much better. I can actually go on one! She's afraid to go on a areoplane with a 6yo and a 3yo by herself.
Nope- I am definately very comfortable with my one!
The Following User Says Thank You to SimplyMum For This Useful Post:
11-05-2012 07:01 #9Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
We just went through the same thing and decided that there were heaps of pros for only having one child, the main one being that you are doing what is right for your family.
The Following User Says Thank You to carleena For This Useful Post:
11-05-2012 08:37 #10
One of the biggest ones for me is you don't have to worry about being "fair". I have two siblings and my whole childhood was about what was fair to my brother and sister. Pretty much every request was "sorry, if we do/buy that for you we will have to do/buy it for the others". It was sooo frustrating.
The things I get excited about are
- Letting her choose whatever activities she wants - dancing, skiing, music, science... whatever she wants I will fund and drive her around without having to fit in with other kids
- going on amazing overseas holidays and adventures and not having one kid not want to do whatever the other kid wants to do, missing out on something because one kid is too young or not interested or whatever
- her 18th birthday when I hand her the keys to a brand new car
The Following User Says Thank You to shelle65 For This Useful Post:
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