I think it is really important to be realistic. When our first cycle was cancelled on the day of our 'transfer' we were devastated. We were lucky enough to have a good chat with our FS over the phone that day. She said we were in for the long haul and that it could be costly. The next time we saw her she mentioned the possibilty of using an egg donor.
After our second failed cycle we made a plan. Try everything - diet, acupuncture, DHEA, supplements - and then try one more cycle. If it fails, look into egg donation.
It failed. We start our egg donor cycle in July. We're happy.
There is no way I'm going to put my life on hold for more IVF cycles. I hate the emotional rollercoaster. I don't need a child that has a biological link to me but it did take me a while to come to that realisation.
Strangely enough, we are now about to foster DH's 5 year old cousin. Just having her around on weekends has shown us that we can develop a strong bond with a child even if it doesn't have a biological link to us.
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05-05-2012 20:31 #21Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2011
06-05-2012 09:47 #22Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2008
DH and i said at the beginning we have the whole year for this, money isn't an issue (it was, but not really) and we thought to see some kind of positive reult within 3 full stim cycles. I never thought the first fresh cycle/transfer would work and even now when i see my FS at work (i work within the hospital) i say thankyou and that i'm still in shock it worked. DH thought it would work first go, i wasn't so sure. I think it depends on your personal circumstances. we already have a 3yr old DS who took awhile to concieve and had 2 ectopics last year, so i could technically get pregnant they just implanted in the wrong spots.
06-05-2012 18:54 #23
I was in the " won't stop till I get there". After 4 failed Stims and not 1 egg collected my sister stepped in an donated eggs. We had 1 embryo fertilize and that 1 embryo is my son who is just about to turn one.
I'm now in the " will stop at nothing for number 2". I've had 2 bfns on my sisters second stim cycle. We have 1 left in the freezer before we stim again. I really really want 2.
06-05-2012 19:13 #24
We were lucky enough to conceive dd in 2009 in our first stim cycle. I was prepared to do as many cycles as it took. We never had a limit.
Since then we have had one failed thaw for an FET and one full stim with terrible results. I am about to start my next stim cycle having added a few drugs like dhea.
We have one dd and are forever grateful for her. But we would desperately love to give her a sibling.
But I won't put a "number of cycles" limit on myself because I just don't think it's useful. Instead I use this train of thinking: I will know when it's time to give up on ivf when the emotional and physical pain of another stim cycle is worse than the pain of not having another baby.
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