Your DH obviously doesn't really know much about the test then? It's not only for DS but also a few of the other syndromes like Trisomy. It also doesn't give a definite yes or no, just a ratio of risk. I personally don't see the harm in getting the test, for peace of mind and also more for the other syndromes.
I'd just do the test, and I'd tell him that you are carrying the baby in YOUR body and it's not up to him to 'let' you do things to your own body.
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01-05-2012 12:07 #11-
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- Nov 2008
01-05-2012 12:09 #12
I have to agree with PP and say if it was that important to me I would get the test done anyway. While you may not terminate on the results of the scan, the scan can also pick up any issues or other non compatible with life afflictions.
Its also a lovely way to bond with bubs. Good luck, it seems your in a tough position.
01-05-2012 12:18 #13
The thing is DS is only one thing that can show up at the NT scan. At my NT scan it was discovered I had had a missed m/c. At another friends NT scan it was discovered that her baby had Trisomy 18.
There are a myriad of things that the NT scan can reveal, not just DS.
I agree with PP, just get it done if it will set your mind at ease
01-05-2012 13:07 #14
i wouldn't go behind his back, personally i just couldn't do it,
maybe take him to the doctors when you and get them to explain to him what else happens during the scan etc, maybe assure him that whatever the tests reveal that you will sit down and talk about it etc. i dnot think you should cut him entirely out of it. yes its your body but its his baby as welll.
01-05-2012 14:19 #15
We had the test done really just so we could see bub on the ultrasound again... We loved seeing it moving etc. and it was positive for downs. We were so shocked because like you ..no family history, I'm 30, so we had no risk factors at all.
However there are many other illnesses / health issues that can come with downs.
My obs told me they have increased risk of leukemia, heart malformations, Hearing and sight loss etc etc
I prob would not have terminated simply due to downs because they can live happy fulfilled lives .....but our bub also had a very deformed heart
The docs told us it prob would not survive full term and if it did, it would be born needing multiple major surgeries most likely not surviving the first year.
We believed it would be selfish to bring that child into the world knowing the amount of pain and suffering it would endure.
Follow your heart and get the test if you feel you want to ESP if you will be the primary care giver of your child.
I don't regret knowing.
This is just my story / opinion and we did what felt right for us so I hope no one judges us.....
Good luck and big hugs xxx
01-05-2012 14:29 #16Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
I would get the test done if I were you, with or without my DP's 'permission'. You reading will most likely be absolutely fine in which case you can stop stressing for the rest of your pregnancy, If it is not fine, then at least you know and you can decide what your next step is. Good luck
01-05-2012 14:35 #17three terrific kids
- Join Date
- Sep 2007
- Perth WA
01-05-2012 16:01 #18
It can be a good idea to test regardless... because if it's likely that your child will have DS, you have some more time to prepare for that, physically and emotionally.
TBH, I would get the test done. I would tell him that I needed to know... if for nothing more than peace of mind and preparation purposes.
If I discovered there was a high likelyhood of DS, I really don't know what I'd do... because there's no way I'd have a baby I didn't want to raise just because my partner was against abortion. I suspect my relationship would end no matter happened tbh... unfortunately.
01-05-2012 16:11 #19Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2009
It's not a down syndrome scan it is for more than just that. It tests two other trisomy's that are fatal!
I sure as hell don't want to go on being naive thinking everything's fine when my baby is either going to die in me or after they are born and a scan would have told me so. Nt is still only an indication
01-05-2012 16:58 #20
I would get it done and tell my partner I was getting it done. Regardless of what you would do keep/terminate, as the other posters have said, its not just a test for Downs. The NT scan plus the bloods tests for other things as well. Plus the scan itself can also show other problems not related to DS.
My 12 week NT scan showed my baby had Fetal Hydrops which is a condition where fluid surrounds the major organs (heart, lung, brains, etc) and as the baby grows the fluid squeezes the organs so they cant grow. I was told my baby probably wouldnt last till term and the kindest thing I could do was terminate. Which I did at 12 weeks. It was horrible but it was the best thing for the baby and the best thing for my family. My bloods also came back as a 1:2 chance of DS.
I am grateful to live in a country/time that we can have such tests so we can prepare for what is coming, be it a healthy baby or to find out any problems so that they can be dealt with.
I couldnt encourage you more to get the test done. I would tell your partner you are doing it and he can either with you and support you or he can stay at home and sulk. He has put his foot down and so can you!
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