ADVERTISEMENT

+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 40
  1. #11
    Witwicky's Avatar
    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    5,629
    Thanks
    4,446
    Thanked
    3,496
    Reviews
    10
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I was approached by a man (alone, probably in his 40's) when I was in early primary, he offered me a lift home. May have been harmless, but I definitely got an odd vibe from him. He was persistent and it was scary.

    I have also been assaulted by a stranger, in broad daylight.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    1,089
    Thanks
    137
    Thanked
    430
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    When I was 10 a friend and I were hiking along some cliffs near our house and a man jumped out and flashed us and started masturbating.....

    Having said that, as anyone who is involved in the other thread would know I am not a big proponent of the 'stranger danger theory'. Yes there are weirdo perverts, yes it is very sad that some children do get abducted and abused but statistics put the figure at around one in a million. So I refuse to let the minute chance of something happening affect the way I raise my daughter.
    However being free-range does not mean that I just discard safety altogether. My DD and DS will be allowed to go places unsupervised, walk to the shop etc. My 5 year old DD already walks to the park with her neighborhood friends. I teach her about safety (road safety, play safety etc). I do not tell her not to talk to strangers or put the fear of god into her about stranger danger because if something untoward did happen and I wasn't there, I would want her to feel comfortable going to a stranger for help. The majority of people are good, and I want her to know that! Safety in numbers is also important to me, she is being raised free-range but there is something to be said for being with others.... I have also taught her that she can speak to anybody, but is not to go off with anyone other than me and DH or a few other close family members........
    Last edited by Mum2EandR; 29-04-2012 at 18:47.

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Mum2EandR For This Useful Post:

    Annabella  (29-04-2012)

  4. #13
    Witwicky's Avatar
    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    5,629
    Thanks
    4,446
    Thanked
    3,496
    Reviews
    10
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Also - my other assaults were from relatives/friends. It is definitely more prevalent...opportunistic offences are not as common (but they can and do happen). For me, it's important to be vigilant in all situations.
    Last edited by Witwicky; 29-04-2012 at 18:48.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Witwicky For This Useful Post:

    captainscaptain  (30-04-2012)

  6. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    134
    Thanks
    55
    Thanked
    18
    Reviews
    0
    I would rather be a bit paranoid than mourning my child's life or innocence. I teach DD1 (almost 10) to be very wary. She looks older and is starting to get curves. One thing I always taught her was never to trust someone who continues to smile at you if you don't smile back (that includes family, friends, authorities!) I also taught her to never go anywhere with a stranger and that if she did get nervous or scared to make LOTS of noise (yell/scream), it's the best first line of defense. I don't like to scare her but it's better then her dad promising that nothing will happen to her - idiot...

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to Seraph8 For This Useful Post:

    jacobsmamma  (30-04-2012)

  8. #15
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    10,407
    Thanks
    398
    Thanked
    723
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    You know what, nothing happened to me as a kid. Nothing. Nothing happened to me as a teen and nothing bad has happened to me as an adult. I had one very inappropriate phone call to the house from a paedophile who I will never, ever know but he must have been through going through the phone book and ringing randoms.
    However I'm influenced because of my childhood...nothing bad happened to me. I have nothing to be fearful of. My parents would be classed as 'helicopter parents' (well my mum anyway...my dad was a RAAF brat growing up and was nowhere near as protective as my mum was when we were growing up). I want the same for my kids...the freedom to explore, be independent and have no bad memories to haunt them. I have it....I was an extremely indpendent kid. I went on holidays with my friends when I was 16 and moved out of home at 18 and was perfectly capable to cope in 'the real world.' I strive to give my kids the same childhood.

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to Areca For This Useful Post:

    CluckySC  (29-04-2012)

  10. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,842
    Thanks
    305
    Thanked
    311
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    The top two that come to mind:

    In a park in Italy with DS1... A man came up and stared at him intensely. I tried to ignore the man and keep playing with DS... Then realized the man was zipping and unzipping his pants and touching himself.

    The other was at a shop with DS1. In a quiet lovely area. DS was sitting on the floor near me playing. A very creepy man who made my skin physically crawl walked to the door, stared at DS, then got down to his level and started chatting to him then asked him to go for a walk. I was right there. I told DS to go play at the rear of the shop and the man ran away.

    I don't teach my child stranger danger - I want them to expect to find good in people - but I do tell DS to always follow his feeling about people, never to talk to anyone because he feels he should, always to stay with mummy or daddy and that if he doesn't feel 'heart love' (what he calls kindness) from someone to move away. He knows that some people aren't good people and that situations and people can be dangerous. He's only four so I see it as my job to look out for him rather than him being worried about what's out there.

    I don't expect to find bad people or dangerous situations. I see the world as generally safe and people as generally good. I travelled Europe and Asia alone. I stayed with people I met online through couch surfing. I went to dinner at the houses of locals I got chatting to on the street. I've hosted travelers I've never met before in my home and given them my keys.

    I generally trust people - and I feel that I am more able to do that because my parents kept me safe. They protected me, which gave me time to develop my intuition and learn to trust my gut feeling. That hasn't been clouded by trauma.

    I'm protective, and will continue to be, but it's not because the world scares me - it's because I want it to feel as safe and awesome to my kids as it does to me.

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to CluckySC For This Useful Post:

    Areca  (29-04-2012)

  12. #17
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    158
    Thanks
    75
    Thanked
    49
    Reviews
    0
    When I was 11years old, the 12 year old daughter of my family's best friend family (our parents were best friends and us kids were all best friends) was murdered, by a stranger, on the way to school. 20 years later we are all closer than ever but there is still a hole where one of us used to be. My parents attitude changed after that, we had to go OSHC for longer than probably planned. My parenting attitude is definitely the "trust nobody" approach.

  13. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    7,713
    Thanks
    412
    Thanked
    668
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Areca View Post
    You know what, nothing happened to me as a kid. Nothing. Nothing happened to me as a teen and nothing bad has happened to me as an adult. I had one very inappropriate phone call to the house from a paedophile who I will never, ever know but he must have been through going through the phone book and ringing randoms.
    However I'm influenced because of my childhood...nothing bad happened to me. I have nothing to be fearful of. My parents would be classed as 'helicopter parents' (well my mum anyway...my dad was a RAAF brat growing up and was nowhere near as protective as my mum was when we were growing up). I want the same for my kids...the freedom to explore, be independent and have no bad memories to haunt them. I have it....I was an extremely indpendent kid. I went on holidays with my friends when I was 16 and moved out of home at 18 and was perfectly capable to cope in 'the real world.' I strive to give my kids the same childhood.
    Im a bit confused, your mum was a helicopter mum and you had a trouble free childhood, doesn't that show that helicopter parenting worked well in your case?

    Trouble for me started in High school once I had that bit more freedom. I came across a few flashers, was randomly physically assaulted by a few strangers too. Nothing major though really considering the situations I was putting myself in by sneaking out at night from age 12 or so. I think I'm overprotective ATM but Dd is only 3, I've got no idea how I'm going to handle things in the future. Will have to see how she turns out and work around that I suppose.

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to bada For This Useful Post:

    jacobsmamma  (30-04-2012)

  15. #19
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    10,407
    Thanks
    398
    Thanked
    723
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by bada View Post
    Im a bit confused, your mum was a helicopter mum and you had a trouble free childhood, doesn't that show that helicopter parenting worked well in your case?
    .
    sorry, in the other thread, the one that is a spin off from I said that I am a bit oh a helicopter parent. So yeah I'm influenced by my parents to give my kids the same amount of protection they gave me because it worked so well in keping me safe and allowing me a happy, trouble free childhood....something all kids should get to experience

  16. #20
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    7,713
    Thanks
    412
    Thanked
    668
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Areca View Post
    sorry, in the other thread, the one that is a spin off from I said that I am a bit oh a helicopter parent. So yeah I'm influenced by my parents to give my kids the same amount of protection they gave me because it worked so well in keping me safe and allowing me a happy, trouble free childhood....something all kids should get to experience
    Ah ok sorry, i thought you were saying you wanted to give them freedom as in go free range. Got you now.

    Id have to admit my mum went a bit overboard with some things, she was a real worry wart - I was the only kid not allowed to go to sleepovers at certain ppl's houses, and she was paranoid about us hurting ourselves. But I made it through childhood without one broken bone, and otherwise relatively unscathed. I guess her approach worked in that stage of life, but it probably caused me to be a little more reckless once I had a taste of freedom.


 

Similar Threads

  1. When and how to teach "stranger danger"?
    By MsMummy in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 21
    Last Post: 10-02-2013, 16:19
  2. Removed from their family for the parenting style?
    By trishalishous in forum News & Current Affairs
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 31-03-2012, 23:55
  3. Attachment parenting is a flexible style of parenting
    By elleandsam in forum Natural / Attachment Parenting
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 21-02-2012, 14:21

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

FEATURED SUPPORTER
Edge Early LearningEdge Early Learning is Qld’s newest network of community based early learning centres. With unique environments that ...
REVIEWS
"Made bed time less anxious"
by Meld85
My Little Heart Whisbear - the Humming Bear reviews ›
"Wonderful natural Aussie made product!"
by Mrstwr
Baby U Goat Milk Moisturiser reviews ›
"Replaced good quality with cheap tight nappies"
by Kris
Coles Comfy Bots Nappies reviews ›

ADVERTISEMENT