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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    Okay, so getting all deep here....why do you think there were so many defensive/negative responses in the other thread?
    Because the OP had a rude tone about it....it came across as though she was implying that if you don't 'beautify' yourself you are using motherhood as an excuse to not do it...a bit of a 'if I can do it anyone can and it should be done' type of thing when realistically it takes all types of people to make up the world and beautifying yourself just isn't a priority for a lot of people, me included. I wasn't defensive though. I simply stated that I look after myself through diet and exercise and that beautifying myself was something I did when I was insecure with the way I looked. Now I'm comfortable enough with myself to be happy to be natural and I much prefer it. This is just how it was for me though, I don't think that everyone who beautifies themselves is doing it for those reasons and I don't judge a mum who does, unless she makes out like she is the perfect person and her heels, make-up, and perfect hair are part of that (I'm thinking of someone I know online elsewhere about this too...it's not in relation to anyone on BH).

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  3. #22
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    No, i would judge you on your personality but not your looks.
    I think the reason people are defensive in the other thread is purely the way the OP worded the thread - it came across as not speading lots of time beautifying yourself = not looking after yourself. Of course people are going to be annoyed about that.

  4. #23
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    I just read it again, and I thought she meant that, for her, it didn't require too much to look good. Being a mother didn't mean she no longer had time for herself? Isn't that a good thing? I suppose it just effected me because I wondered if people viewed my "effort" the same way they seemed to view hers?

    Sorry, I'm having a sensitive moment and just saying what comes to mind. I promise I will now move on.

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  6. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    Okay, so getting all deep here....why do you think there were so many defensive/negative responses in the other thread?
    Because in the other thread the OP equated looking after yourself to superficial upkeep. Whilst it has it's place 'good health' (mental and physical) is a lot more than hair and makeup. It's regular exercise, making time for yourself, pursuing self development, eating well, being in a loving and secure environment, spending time with friends and family etc.

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    Phrases like no excuse, look good for my husband, spend a fortune do nothing but reinforce stereotypes and create judgement. If you wanna look that way go nuts. And if you don't, goodo.

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  10. #26
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    Okey dokey, see what you mean. I missed that slant on it from my original reading.

    Quote Originally Posted by ~Bec~ View Post
    Because in the other thread the OP equated looking after yourself to superficial upkeep. Whilst it has it's place 'good health' (mental and physical) is a lot more than hair and makeup. It's regular exercise, making time for yourself, pursuing self development, eating well, being in a loving and secure environment, spending time with friends and family etc.

  11. #27
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    No, I wouldn't really care either way. If you were looking super amazing all the time I would probably be in awe of you.

  12. #28
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    I rarely notice what other people look like when im out and about. Im ususally trying to make sure one or both of the kids aren't flipping out.

    But if i do see a mum like that, i wouldnt think anything? I find that type of thing (judging others based on appearance) to be wasted energy.

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    Oj i get the opposite..

    never beautiful or pretty just sexual or sensual!! lol
    i want pretty goddammit!

    no i do not judge at all. my fave mums are the ones that are out there...
    50s dress
    tattoos
    rock chick
    anything other than normal, impresses me!

    dressed up mums do too!

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    I don't "judge" but I was annoyed when another mum at child care today looked nicer than me.
    Man, I've got issues...


 

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