and he always peeks on something like for example of I didn't get time to boil broccoli he will keep saying what is this why haven't you put it away. Or when will you do a proper job when he doesn't do anything and expects me to do everything, he says other women do it and when I say who he just says everyone . He has five sister and a mother and father. His parents have always spoofed him all the time. I don't rest at all and have physical pain in my back my baby is the only sweetheart that keeps me going he makes me smile and he motivates me
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11-04-2012 04:07 #11
11-04-2012 04:22 #12
I own my own business and have two charente under two. My youngest is 15 weeks. I can tell you now that the days I go to work are my 'rest' days. You need to organise something where you are not home for a day do your DH learns what a day involves. Don't pre cook anything, don't pre prepare anything. Then at a time when you both are calm sit down and discuss how you feel and what your concerns are.
Goodluck. I think in most relationships the woman does more with the house and kids but it does sound like your situation is extreme.
11-04-2012 18:13 #13
11-04-2012 18:26 #14
Mine is close to that, although cooks his own dinner (eats at 3-4pm as he works nights 5 days a week) & will normally cook me dinner once a week. He only takes our rubbish put when I leave the full bag at the door & even then sometimes he 'forgets' it! Main difference though is that he doesnt pick on me about stuff. I've said to him that it's cool he wants me to do everything but he can't expect a 100% clean house while I'm looking after a baby & toddler. He gets that so that makes it easier. I'm so sorry your DH picks at u about things that would be so hard I'm forced to go back to work next month (1-2 days a week) so I'll b getting even less dome then! It's just so hard and you can't be expected to do every single little thing.
20-04-2012 14:20 #15
My response is that I get upset and tell him to stop picking on me as I work around the house and do everything it's just sometimes something is not done Cos iv been busy with baby.
But I'm always doing something every second and don't get time to sit.
20-04-2012 14:31 #16
Like that post from fb
20-04-2012 14:35 #17
In all this just a little smile from my baby son brings joy to my life. Every second a spend with him if like gold his so adorable and the best thing il sacrifice everything for my baby
20-04-2012 14:51 #18
I'm grateful my Dh and I share all duties of housework and childraising equally. A relationship/parenthood is a team effort, it shouldn't be one sided.
20-04-2012 15:05 #19
Studies have proven that being a SAHM is the equivalent of working TWO full time jobs.
Ask him when you're allowed to have a break? He gets to come home and not think about his job, yet you are never away from yours.
Can you write him a letter explaining how you are feeling? He seems to be deluded in thinking that all men act this way, and that is simply not the case. A real man helps his woman around the home...it's an equal partnership.
I stay at home so I do the majority of housework but if I ask my DP he will help out when he can. It's unfair of your man to assume all the responsibility of the home on to you, especially when you have a baby to look after.
20-04-2012 15:11 #20
I know how u feel Aleen. My DH is like your sometimes. Italian background who's mothers is a slave to the father.
My FIL cannot even boil a pot of water. Plus my MIL works 4 days a week and raised 4 kids.
I am far from a domestic goddess and try my hardest to keep things clean with a toddler and a puppy! It's bloody hard!
He will come home and pick on the one thing I didn't get to, and not see the 50 things I actually did do that day.
It drives me mad.
The other day I told him its like if he came home everyday and I asked him how much money he made that day and then told him its not enough and hes not doing a good enough job. It's the exactly the same thing.
Your doing your best and tell him to get stuffed.
It's hard I know. Maybe tell him you will get a job and he can be a SAHF. I can tell you he will be begging to swap back after a week.
Stay strong and focus on your child sounds like you are a wonderful mum.
Also in your pic you look exactly like my little sister so hugs to you xxxx
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