I am so sorry you are going through this.
No decent woman would do something like this, but at the same time, no decent husband would, either.
I don't think it sounds innocent, and in no way are you over reacting.
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07-04-2012 20:43 #21-
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07-04-2012 20:51 #22
Definitely need to sit him down again and make him realize how serious you are about his behavior. It's not just THIS woman he needs to realize, it's any woman he decides to have inappropriate friendships with and you will have none of it.
My DF used to facebook and text random women in the Begining of our relationship, i know he never actually met any. There was loads of flirting but when she would suggest to meet up he would turn around n say nah god a gf. (lol I read them all). At the Begining he told me this girl was texting him flirting and he told me he told her that he had a gf etc but she would t leave him alone... But then it turned out he was letting it continue.
I got upset, almost dumped him, sat him down and told him how I felt, how even though he hadn't actually done anything or met these women that he was infact still cheating and as if he was 'looking for someone else'. I gave him an 'out' but he chose to follow my restrictions. He told me that he was just bored and it was funny.
I kept tabs on him from then on every now and then, he hasn't done it since I'm pretty sure of it and it's been 3 years since. Some men I think need a good wakeup call, others you can only do so much and never change like my friend's bf (always cheats, abusive but she keeps coming back). I hope he's the first.
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07-04-2012 21:15 #23Junior Member
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- Apr 2012
After He walked away from me (his inital reaction to me admitting I had just called her) he came back into the house and apologised again for what he's done and that it'll never happen again. An error in judgement on his part, he says. As mentioned before I'd like to believe him but may need a bit of time to heal.
All I can say about why I called her is that she has children also so she obviously was in some sort of relationship before. How would she feel if she was in my shoes? If her partner was at the beck and call of another woman. I wouldnt wish this feeling upon my worst enemy. So I simply told her that if she was a 'lady' she'd stop texting and calling a married man at all hours of the day and night. Im terrible with confrontations and would avoid them at all costs, but after (what my husband finally revealed) a few missed calls from her and a first text asking what he was doing... She sent the text that I mentioned before... "Snob! Lol <3" ... I took that last icon as a love-heart...and so I snapped. It just had to be said. And my husbands plan to cut ties with her completely was to ignore her calls/txts. It obviously didnt work as she texted him calling him a snob.
07-04-2012 21:24 #24
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07-04-2012 21:28 #25
07-04-2012 21:30 #26
WOW-----you are a really brave woman for ringing her and politely letting her know that she is out of line. I really admire you for having the courage to take proactive steps to sort things out. You should be really proud of yourself.
As for your husband, he is not entirely innocent and time will tell if he plans on staying true to his word. I guess the only thing you can do is watch him closely and see if he changes any of his usual habits (ie: no longer leaving his phone unattended or going outside to take calls / texts etc).
Good luck, I hope it all works out.
07-04-2012 21:49 #27-
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- Western Sydney
Good luck, hope he sticks to it!
Last edited by Merlsy; 07-04-2012 at 21:56.
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07-04-2012 21:52 #28
Couldn't read and not reply! Just wanted to say you are such a brave woman to confront her! I would have fallen to pieces!
You have definitely done the right thing. Huge hugs to you- I hope you guys can work through this
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07-04-2012 22:48 #29
Good on you for confronting that woman! I hope your husband knows how much it hurts you and puts effort in to healing your relationship & gaining your trust back.
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08-04-2012 05:24 #30
Well done for being up front with him, and with her. The ball is now in his court to prove himself to you.
Take care, I hope it all works out for you both
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