View Poll Results: Is it bullying?

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  • It's mean but not bullying

    16 35.56%
  • It's bullying

    29 64.44%
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  1. #11
    Guest Guest
    Yes it's bullying.

  2. #12
    Busy-Bee's Avatar
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    Bullying is repeated behaviours - this sounds like a one-off of some rather nasty and mean behaviour and definitely something to take issue with. Wow, poor child who got left out, what a mean thing to do

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  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tamtam View Post
    Agreed. One incident is not bullying.

    As a teacher I don't let kids hand out birthday invites or presents in such a fashion during class. I figure that's a personal thing to be done on their own time. Therefore responsibility lies with parents and the child if exclusions are made. In saying that I would counsel a student who felt left out or was excluded. It's not the teachers fault, they didn't buy the presents. It lies with the parents who allowed that to happen. It's very rude to exclude just one child in the class.
    Invitations at our school are discretely given to kids or parents. So far any gifts have been whole class gifts, and not food. We have been lucky.

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  6. #14
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    i think there has been smaller incidences before now...but nothing major (but this is a friends child, so i don't know everything). I know because i saw her upset and asked what was wrong.

    no idea what happened next etc.

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    As others have said, an isolated incident is not defined as bullying. It is mean and nasty for sure, but not bullying.

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    What do you mean by 'made a big deal out of' being one short? Was she deliberately excluding one or had she accidentally fallen one short and was apologising profusely? I'm not sure what the 'big deal' means and that makes a difference.

    If she miscounted and accidentally was one short, then I wouldn't call it mean or bullying exactly. Unfortunate, and that's why it shouldn’t be done publicly in class, but not bullying.

    But if she deliberately was one short and pointed it out nastily, then that's absolutely bullying.

    In any case I feel for the poor child left out.

  9. #17
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    if the child was saying something like "I didn't get so and so nothing because I dont like him/her! She/he doesn't deserve a pressie!", it wouldn't be accidental.

    Either way, I have been on the receiving end of that one during my childhood and oh man did it hurt!!! These girls were bullies though. The "not giving a souvenir or inviting me to their birthdays" (when I did invite them to mine) wasn't the worst thing they did though.
    However I still remember these incidents in primary school and now 25 years later, I still have bad dreams about these girls
    I wont ever forget the looks on those girls faces, the big nasty smirks, the other kids laughing at me, etc. It definitely brought my selfesteem down to hit rock bottom and it stayed like that all the way upto uni years

    I really really feel so sorry for this child

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  11. #18
    Eko's Avatar
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    I am NOT trying to be a smart alec, but the Merriam-Webster dictionary has this to say:

    bul·lied
    bul·ly·ing
    Definition of BULLY

    transitive verb
    1
    : to treat abusively

    2
    : to affect by means of force or coercion

    Nowhere does it say that an incident caused by a bully has to be repeated to be defined as such.
    It is bullying behaviour, whether it's the 1st time or the 50th.

    We don't know if this child has acted like this before or will again.
    All we can look at is the behaviour itself. Did the child act abusively? Exclusion can certainly be emotional abuse and in this case it was clearly intended to cause exactly that. Ergo, this child behaved in a bullying manner.

    I can walk up to someone I've never met and say "You're an effing jerk and you should take a long walk of a short plank if you don't agree with my point of view!" and never say a word to them again. Because it's an isolated incidence, that doesn't mean it isn't bullying behaviour.

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  13. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eko View Post
    I am NOT trying to be a smart alec, but the Merriam-Webster dictionary has this to say:

    bul·lied
    bul·ly·ing
    Definition of BULLY

    transitive verb
    1
    : to treat abusively

    2
    : to affect by means of force or coercion

    Nowhere does it say that an incident caused by a bully has to be repeated to be defined as such.
    It is bullying behaviour, whether it's the 1st time or the 50th.

    We don't know if this child has acted like this before or will again.
    All we can look at is the behaviour itself. Did the child act abusively? Exclusion can certainly be emotional abuse and in this case it was clearly intended to cause exactly that. Ergo, this child behaved in a bullying manner.

    I can walk up to someone I've never met and say "You're an effing jerk and you should take a long walk of a short plank if you don't agree with my point of view!" and never say a word to them again. Because it's an isolated incidence, that doesn't mean it isn't bullying behaviour.
    I do agree, but when it comes to school... bullying is defined as repeated behaviour

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  15. #20
    Guest Guest
    Why are people saying bullying has to be repeated to be that? This child was bullied, will feel bullied and it only takes 1 time. I can guarantee if this kid isn't pulled up on it, she'll continue to be mean and bully.
    That poor child must have felt so hurt


 

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