Hi my name is Steph. I have been seeing this 'great' guy for only just over 7 weeks now. We weren't using protection, we were both aware of what we were doing. I am 28 have never been pregnant and have always wondered whether I could even get pregnant. Well my q was answered about a week ago when 3 tests came back positive. Told the guy and he started treating me different and told me to get rid of it. We got along so well until we found out. Have had 2 blood tests and a scan to confirm I fell pregnant within the first 3 days of us having sex. I mean what are the chances- to be 28 and never pregnant. Anyway so I made him come to the scan and his eyes were glued to the monitor. Yet tonight he told me because I have decided to keep the baby we are no longer b/f and g/f and it's my fault that the relationship got ruined by the choice that I made. It's really hard- I live in a town where I know quite a few ppl and he is only new to here but has a job where I will be seeing him quite often. So anyway I have made the decision to keep it, but I can't help but feel sad that this relationship could have been something great and I am so worried that even though I have a supportive family and friends that I will always wonder. Btw- there has been nothing more in the world that I than a baby- so maybe I'm just sad by his reaction. Advice? Please
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28-03-2012 02:55 #1Junior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2012
'I'm pregnant and he wants abortion'
28-03-2012 03:54 #2
Guys have a tendency to freak out in situations like this but if you feel in YOUR heart that you have made the right choice than don't second guess that. He has 9 months to come around and get used to the idea. If he doesn't, then take comfort that you will have a little bundle of joy that will idolise you no matter what and be grateful for the life that you have given them.
Congrats on your pregnancy xoxox
28-03-2012 08:27 #3
he may come around, men do freak when the hear these things. If he doesnt com around you still have a gorgeous baby so either way you win, its him who misses out on you! Congratulations on your pregnancy xxx
28-03-2012 08:39 #4
He may be in shock and he may come around to the idea, but honestly, if he is not willing to man up and take responsibility for his part in this, then he is not worth it.
28-03-2012 08:45 #5-
- Join Date
- Feb 2009
Aw honey, that's tough. But at the end if the day he knew the risks so he needs to accept the consequences. You have to do what feels right for you, he can't force you to make a decision that you would feel uncomfortable with.
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28-03-2012 09:08 #6
I think his behavior is appalling it takes 2 to tango you didnt get pregnant on your own it's not as black and white as well have an abortion that's a lot to ask of someone it's selfish of him to ask that of you. If anyone has ruined the relationship it's him in my opinion. I don't think your choice is wrong. If he doesn't come around to the idea just know that this baby is precious take care
28-03-2012 09:32 #7
I agree with AB and Madame Mayhem. His choice was whether to use contraception or not, it ended there.
As the others say he might just be having a freak out and come around. If he doesn't and continues to act this way I'm guessing it wouldn't have been such a great relationship anyway - he sounds like an immature tosser. Lucky you found out early before you wasted a couple of years on him. At least this way you won't be mid-30s, single and wondering if you will ever get to be a mum!
Being a single mum is hard but has some fantastic advantages too - come chat to us all over in the single parents' section, you will see how awesome we all are and realise you too will be just as awesome as us
28-03-2012 09:58 #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2007
Ultimately our laws are set up so people have the right to do with their own body as they please. He was silly enough to not use a condom and is now playing the victim but in the end it's your body and emotions that will suffer the consequences so it's up to you what happens from here. Good luck
28-03-2012 10:07 #9
I think you just need to give him time to have his little freak out before you start freaking out. This is a big deal!!
In your 7 weeks of courtship did you talk about kids etc? Do you know if he was wanting kids anytime soon? Maybe he wasnt planning on it and is just seeing his life flash before his eyes? LOL
Give him time.
On a brighter note... CONGRATULATIONS!!
28-03-2012 10:14 #10
[text deleted by moderator]
Anyway back to the OP, sorry to hear you are going through this, and perhaps it wasn't wise to be having unprotected sex with someone after such a short amount of time, but he knew the risks too. If he now wants to turn around and put it all back on you because you have decided to take responsibility for it, then I don't think that is the kind of partner you want anyway. But hopefully he is just scared and will come around, and even if you aren't together, I hope he can at least support you.
Good luck with it all
Last edited by BH-KatiesMum; 28-03-2012 at 19:46. Reason: response to deleted text
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