DH came to all FS appts except one.
He couldn't come to BT and ultrasound appts because they're too early in the morning for him to manage, but he wanted to come.
He came to the first ET, but didn't manage/arrange to make it to the others. We filled the waiting room at that first ET. My mum came with me (I needed to use her car because DH wasn't ready to leave that early), then DH came with one carer who was already rostered on that shift but didn't have a drivers licence, and a second carer who picked up a couple of extra hours of work because she did have a drivers licence, so could drive him down when he was ready. That rigmarole, coupled with not being certain he'd arrive in time for ET was a factor in him missing the rest.
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24-03-2012 12:25 #11
24-03-2012 14:21 #12
My hubby doesn't come to all the appointments, he only comes to EPU and where we need a sample. Other than that I do it all on my own - and seriously I'm happy with that . My hubby is a contractor so every hour is counted and his job just isn't flexable, but even if he could make all appointments, I'd feel he was craping my style .
24-03-2012 14:28 #13
DH came to most appointments, and all EPUs, and all ETs except for the first one. (I didn't know he could be in the room and thought there's no point him waiting in the waiting room). Most of our cycle appointments and scans were scheduled before work, I'll just do the BT last if FS ran late. I wanted him to be there, it feels odd to conceive without him "there".
24-03-2012 16:23 #14Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2011
Great thread - my DH and I have often wondered where all the males where at our clinic. We are in this together and he comes to every appointment (FS, blood tests, scans etc). He also sits with me when I inject. We didn't discuss it, it just kind of happened. We are in this together - 'we' are infertile.
At our last EPU we heard the nurse call someones husband to tell him that he needed to drive his wife home due to the anesthetic. I would feel very isolated having EPU and an anesthetic on my own.
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25-03-2012 16:52 #15
My DH comes to all the appointments with his little notebook. He's like my own PA! Takes notes the whole way through so that he knows exactly what is going on. I swear he knows more about my cycle than I do!
25-03-2012 16:59 #16
DB made all my appts he could. We are lucky that he works on the road so its easyish for us to coordinate our diaries! The only he missed was the transfer as he was in training interstate!!!!
I found it helpful him being there as my mind gets a bit dopey on the drugs!
I can see how it will get harder as the process continues though x
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25-03-2012 17:00 #17
When I was doing IVF (I'm on a break) my DH came to the EPU and egg transfers. He didn't come ot blood tests and ultrasounds. You are in and out for a blood test in about 2 mins, I didn't really see the point of us both missing work, same with the ultrasound He wanted to come but I told him not too for the above reason. We are still in it together regardless of if he is at every appointment or not, I called him as soon as I was out and he'd text me while waiting etc. There was lots of guys at my clinic though Most woman had their partners with them.
Its great that your DH goes to the appointments with you if its what you both want and makes you happy and the whole process easier.
25-03-2012 17:14 #18
DH has come to all (bar one) of our appointments. He insists on coming but I'm not fussed either way, I'm too independent for his liking. He has used up all if his annual leave so from here on out he will only come to essential ones (EPU & ET) but his work has said he has to go back as soon the appt is over. I'm glad he comes as it shows he cares about what's going on, we don't really talk about it otherwise.
25-03-2012 17:30 #19
DH came to any appointments that he was home for but as he works away that wasn't a lot. For my stim cycle he was thankfully around for EPU & ET but missed all the lead up appointments/scans/BTs etc.
For my FET he missed it all! We even changed fertility specialists and he has yet to meet the doctor who produced our DS!
25-03-2012 17:52 #20
My DH came to a couple but not many. The initial consults and then just the EPU and I think the first ET. I worked about 15mins from the clinic and he would have had to take a full day off work even if he was there for 2mins (the nature of his work) so it was easier for me to duck down and have a scan or BT. After we got our BFP I went to the 6wk scan alone and got bad news. From then on I asked he come to the scan after our BFP for a bit of comfort.
But for our last full cycle and 3 transfers DH was interstate and couldnt come to anything. I have to admit usually on the day of ET I was the only one sitting in the waiting room without their partner!
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