For those who are not religious or are spiritual but dont follow a particular religion...
What do/will you tell your children about death?
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12-03-2012 19:26 #1Senior Member
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- Jan 2010
12-03-2012 19:33 #2
That when you die that's it - there's nothing more. That's why it's so important to celebrate your life and to take care of yourself and the planet - as you have this one fantastic opportunity to live
12-03-2012 19:37 #3
I tell my kids that when someone dies, they are gone forever but we can think about them and remember them and talk to them if we want to. I tell them how often I think of my Nan and my son likes to talk to the bush above our dead cat sometimes!
I've also told them that some people want to have their body buried and some want it burnt and that there can be a special place with that person's name where their friends and family can go to remember them.
I have said to them that some people think that dead people go to another place but I don't think so.
I also talk to them about how important it is to enjoy life and be kind
(they are 3 and 5)
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12-03-2012 19:39 #4
i told my son (and will also tell my daughter) that when you die you are no longer 'here'. but some people believe in a place you go (heaven, angels, nirvana) and some people you come back as something else (reincarnation).
i think it's up to the child to ask questions and follow what feels right for them, not necessarily believe what i do. when my son asked what i believe i told him i'm more of a scientist, i believe in energy and think that sometimes people stay with us in a different form.
luckily for me our kids have seen a lot of different religions through travel so he has learned (on his own) that they are all quite similar, and that death is a physical thing where religion is spiritual.
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12-03-2012 19:43 #5
I've told my DD that when you die you're not here anymore (she's 4).
I occasionally use the term heaven. I don't think it has to be religious unless you make it religious - ie relate it to god or angels etc. I think it's nice for kids (or for anyone really) to believe that there's a special place that people go when the die. I think it makes it easier to visualise and understand.
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12-03-2012 19:46 #6
When I was young, my great grandmother said she would always be watching me from the brightest star in the sky.
Every now and then I still look up, even though science and my own religious beliefs tell me that she isn't ACTUALLY on a star lol. It was comforting for a small child though.
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12-03-2012 19:46 #7
I've told her that some people believe in some type of god and that when you die, you go to some sort of place where you live on forever... but I've also told her that I don't believe this, and that I don't actually know what happens when you die, apart from the fact you're no longer alive and that you're either cremated or buried.
She's had no issues with this.
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12-03-2012 20:03 #8
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12-03-2012 20:06 #9
I ask them what they think...
..and just listen.
I love hearing what they come up with!!
Sometimes I talk about people I have loved and lost and how I remember them - what my favorite memories are and what songs or smells remind me of them.
Sometimes we've talked about death when watching a David Attenborough
documentaries - watching a tree fall in a forest and get digested by fungi - pretty awesome stuff - life giving life in death...
We've touched on burial and cremation. (DS1 thinks a cemetary is 'heaven' ..because Nana told him that's where people go when they die )
They helped pick up dead baby birds from the backyard and put them in the compost... they get emotional...mainly because they can see the mother bird flying overhead calling out.
It's not something I want them to scared of, but I want them to know that they are free to grieve and that their lives that they are living know are extremely precious.
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