I get the impression the mother never registered the birth and thus a birth certificate was never issued - otherwise its a simple matter of going to the births deaths marriages office and getting a copy of the original.
OP has your DF spoken to a solicitor about his options to be officially recognised as an Australian citizen so he can get a medicare card, centrelink, married etc? it must be very difficult living with such identity issues.
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07-03-2012 17:09 #21
07-03-2012 17:52 #22
He does have his original birth certificate, and he has a medicare card, drivers license, credit card etc in his 'adopted' name, the trouble rises because there is no connection between the two names. He has only ever been known by his 'adopted' name but because mil never went thru the legal channels, there is no paper trail so to speak. He has no real way of proving that that is his birth certificate. If there was, it would be as simple as changing his name (to the name he has always been known by) by deed poll then births death and marriages will issue a new birth certificate. We are in the process of trying to sort it all out, but it's a lengthy and expensive process. And mil just doesn't get the magnitude that this has impacted, and will continue to impact our lives. Our two children have his last name, and he is listed as their father on their birth certificates, but his name doesn't actually exist with bdm.
Wow, this thread has really taken a turn!!! Lol.
But it feels good to get it all out. So getting back to the tattoo, I don't think I would have an issue if it wasn't for all this. Also, while things with mil are amicable now, she has never really liked me, and a little over a year ago she physically assaulted me and yelled at me things like she was gonna make DF leave me and that he would never love me like he loves her. The tattoo has just brought all this back for me :-(
07-03-2012 18:51 #23
07-03-2012 19:02 #24
Holy moly. Did not expect all that from a tattoo thread.
Hope your DF finally starts existing. Man that would be tough to deal with.
Does the "mother" do anything to help? Feel remorse? Question how and why she went about things so illegally?
•Sent from my iPhone•
07-03-2012 19:08 #25
Wow. Your poor DF. MIL sounds crazy!!! Yes I think it's weird purely because she is a baby kidnapper.
DF poor BM does he know who she is?
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07-03-2012 19:21 #26
No remorse or explanation what so ever. She believes that DF was destined to be hers and all she does is make smart remarks about getting her baby without having to go thru pregnancy or labour. Just the other day while I was breast feeding my 7 week old, she commented how glad she is to have "virgin boobs"!!!
As for DF's birth mum, she has tried to make contact in the past but DF wants nothing to do with her. She has contacted me via facebook too but DF doesn't want me talking to her and I have to respect that. She comes across as quite unstable, but who could blame her!! I believe that the truth lies somewhere between mil and DF's bio mum's version of events but until DF is ready to deal with that (if ever) there's not much I can do. He just can't get past the "how could she give me away" mentality.
One good thing to come of it all though is that he is now in contact with his full bio younger brother and they get along so well and are spending more and more time together.
07-03-2012 19:23 #27
07-03-2012 19:25 #28
If I wasn't living in the middle of it, I'd swear it was an episode of Days of Our Lives!!!
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