DH and I have been talking about trying for number 2 from pretty much the day after we had Noah.
We had a miscarriage in 2009 and didn't get pregnant again until 2011 so i'm worried that if we don't start trying straight away they will have a huge age gap. BUT what happens if we get incredibly lucky and fall pregnant first go!
We keep taking it in turns to want to try so neither of us have been on the same page so we always use protection.
My pregnancy with Noah was awful. I was sick all day everyday and was on bed rest for bleeding from 12 weeks on and then towards the end had blood pressure issues and ended up delivering at 37 weeks by C-section. So part of me is afraid of having a horrible pregnancy again but another part of me is scared of not having anymore kids. DH definitely wants more kids!
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06-03-2012 08:02 #1
06-03-2012 08:08 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2009
We had a similar situation, in that it took us a long time (and some fertility assistance) to have DD. I also hated pregnancy, and didn't have an 'easy' one - although from the sounds of things nowhere near as hard as yours.
We decided to start trying sooner rather than later, as we were worried that it might take a long time again, and that we might need fertility treatment.
I'm really glad we did, as it's been nearly a year now, plus more extensive fertility treatment than before, and I'm still not pregnant.
It's one of those things for which there is no right or wrong answer, but my personal feeling is that if you both want children and you suspect that it may not happen immediately (even if there is a chance it may), then I would err on the side of caution and start trying sooner rather than later.
The way that I saw it (for our own situation) is that the worst case of trying sooner was that we had to go through another pregnancy (which we would whenever we had kids), and have the children fairly close together. The worst case of trying later was that we had less time/ eggs to use, and we never had another child.
Every situation is different, but that was our thinking anyway. Good luck with the decision making!
06-03-2012 08:16 #3
Originally we said we would start in December, then October, then August and Now we seem to talk about it every day, especially now that DS sleeps through!
We thankfully never did fertility treatments, infact I had an appointment booked with my GP when we found out we were pregnant (timing hey!)
I guess if we started trying now and magically got pregnant first go minimum age gap is 12 months. I would likely be pushed into another c-section which I wouldn't mind too much, it was actually a lovely experience after being in labour for two days!
I'm worried about the stress of TTC though- I feel like DH And I should not try, but also not-not try. If that makes sense :P
06-03-2012 08:31 #4Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2009
Yes, I get what you mean. If you can do it then maybe that's your answer! It's so hard not to get focused on it once you start though - but it would definitely help with the stress/ sanity levels if you can do that
06-03-2012 22:48 #5Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2009
I think as long as you are happy with the scenario of falling pregnant straight away then why not start now. If you aren't ready yet, I wouldnt start until you are. You never know what might happen and it's not like there is just a certain time period you have to TTC for and then it magically happens IFYWIM. If it was me, i'd also want some type of plan in my head on how things would work in practical terms if you have another horror pregnancy
PS Just because DB is sleeping through right now doesnt mean it will stay that way unfortunately, so i wouldnt factor that in!!
08-03-2012 11:34 #6
Yeah my worry is that I'll be sick again or on bed rest and Noah won't have his mummy. DH and I keep talking about it but never just going for it. IYKWIM? If I really think about it, it means we aren't ready yet and when we are it'll just happen Thanks girls xx
15-05-2012 22:36 #7
I know how you feel.
I am starting to to think I want to try for #2... But just as I start thinking that DP decides that he does want more just not yet. Which broke my heart.
I myself have fertility issues, DD was a total unplanned shock and proved all those doctors wrong from 6 years ago. My pregnancy was aweful. I had all day sickness, non stop. Extremely bad Symphasis Pubis Dysfunction (which I still haven't recovered from), Extremely bad water retention (I was going blue/purple and my ankles were over 40cm in circ, I went into early labour at 33 weeks and they stopped it but found I have very very high protein levels, my liver started playing up, my iron dropped dangerously low and my blood pressure went up over a few weeks to 155/110 and stayed that way till DD was born naturally at 38 weeks.
It was a nightmare pregnancy and being banned form any real movement at all allowed my weight to balloon so I have 60kgs almost to be in my healthy weight range. But I would bve happy with 30kgs.
I had DD at the weight I am now. So it may be possible. But at the same time I wanted to have lost weight by the time I wanted to get pregnant.
I do worry that will my terrible reproductive system that if we were to try it might take years if I am lucky to have one again.
I say Chin Up, things happen for a reason. You will both know when you are ready =D
So I know how you feel and
15-05-2012 22:39 #8
I will add during my pregnancy I spent probably around 10 - 12 weeks of in it hospital...
So thats a red flag for me too.
Sorry for my spelling in post 1, I am exhausted.
16-05-2012 16:01 #9
Yep I spent roughly the same amount of time in hospital! It's a big fear that I will be that sick again. BUT It could be totally different! We did end up deciding to start trying but already up to our 5th cycle and nothing yet
I have started a very healthy lifestyle change and already dropped 2.1kg and ALOT fitter so hopefully that will help!
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