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  1. #1
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    Default Social events after a loss

    Hi guys.

    I'm just wondering if I'm being over the top about this. Ever since losing bub in December I can't bring myself to go out to social things with friends/family if there will be newborns there.

    I tried for a work gathering for a lady who just had her bub and I couldn't last 2 minutes without having to step out and rush to the bathroom where I burst into tears.

    Even seeing newborns in the street or hearing their little cries set me off

    Has anyone else been through this? How long does it last?! I'm feeling like such a horrible person for avoiding everyone.

  2. #2
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    Grief works differently for everyone. Some people go about their lives as if nothing happened while for some people it affects them deeply.

    Take your time and you will know when your ready to be around babies again. Hugs

    Sent from my GT-I9000T using BubHub

  3. #3
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    Hi Anjalee,

    No, I don't think you're being over the top at all, I think its quite normal. You've just been through a very devestating time.

    I'm interested in reading replies from other ladies who have been through this as I'm still stuggling with the same things too. I don't want to go out and socialise if I know there will be pregnant ladies or new borns as it is still too painful and I feel really bad for it. I'm just wanting to get back to my normal happy self but I feel for me that may be a little way yet.

    Sorry I couldn't be much help, I'm very keen to see the replies as to how long it has taken others. Sending you heaps of hugs!

  4. #4
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    I still find social stuff hard 7 months on from losing my dd. I hate being around babies even though I am expecting myself, it's too painful. Grief is a funny thing and it is a long process learning to live with the pain of losing a bub. I think the best thing we can do is listen to ourselves and don't force yourself to be around people you are not comfortable with. You are rebuilding and the best thing you can do is spend time with people who make you feel good and support you. Don't hang out with babies if you don't feel comfortable yet, it will happen eventually when you are ready. Hugs cause it sucks xxx

  5. #5
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    It's really understandable that you would feel like that after what you have been through.

    I deliberately caught up with some pregnant friends the week after my m/c 30 Jan, because I knew it would be so much harder if I allowed myself to avoid them. And I feel ok around them and other preg women now. There is a feeling of longing of course, but not the intense sadness from earlier on.

    I have to work at it though, by not letting my thoughts go to comparing my situation to theirs etc, which really helps.


 

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