So my not-quite-twelve-year-old got her first period this week.
I feel like I let her down a bit because I had a little emergency pack prepared for here, with a pad, spare knickers, wipes etc, and I hadn't given it to her yet. I thought I had more time
So I'm just thinking now about what things I should be telling her. I've shown her how to stick the pad on, take it off, wrap it up, given her the "don't ever, EVER chuck it down a toilet" lecture, talked to her about tampons down the track if she wants, told her how often to change it, that it might be irregular for a while, suggested she download an app for her iPod to keep track of it. Is there anything else I should be telling her? What do you wish someone had told you when yours first started?
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03-03-2012 15:34 #1
Periods: what do you wish you'd known?
03-03-2012 15:39 #2-
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
That it's not dirty or something to be ashamed of. There are also a lot of myths like you can't wash your hair when you have your period, so maybe debunk some of those myth type things. That clots are normal and nothing to be worried about. NOT to wear white pants/skirt (I learnt the hard way!!) in case of accidents.
03-03-2012 15:40 #3
Oh the joys... Poor little thing. Maybe mention to wear bigger/thicker pad at night and not to freak out if she bleeds over to her nickers/pj's cuz nights can be heavier. Pads with wings prob best and when I first got mine I used to wear the "bum shorts" over my nickers??? Remember those? Do the even still make them. I just remember that the 'firmer' everything was in place the more comfortable I was. Also I'm sure you have already, but reassure her to talk to you about any questions she might have. It's a big change!
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03-03-2012 15:43 #4
I wish I'd been told about tampons earlier (maybe not immediately) and that swimming etc was still okay.
Someone I work with (when I was trying to approach this with my niece-they don't really have a mum around) that you should just buy an assortment of tampons and pads etc. explain the sizes and leave them to experiment what works for them. So I did and it worked wonders!!! I wished my mum had given me this choice and freedom rather than just buying what she always had. (not that that was bad or anything!)
03-03-2012 15:49 #5
Show her how to soak her knickers in Napisan if she has a leak so she can deal with them herself.
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03-03-2012 16:01 #6Senior Member
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- Oct 2009
This may sound odd, but I went on the pill after only a couple of periods as they were so heavy. I stayed on the pill for 10+ years, and it was only when TTC DD that I found out that I don't have periods any more as I don't ovulate. Had to have fertility assistance for DD, and now again for #2.
The dr said it wasn't caused by the pill, but that the pill would have masked there being a problem. I only ever had 2 (?) real periods, so I never knew there were any issues.
Don't know if that will be at all relevant for your daughter, but I guess I wish I had known that it's important to know what is 'normal' for you and your body and not let something mask any issues for that long.
03-03-2012 16:06 #7
I wish I had known about tampons earlier because I hate pads. I haven't used a pad except after childbirth since.
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03-03-2012 16:14 #8
I wish I was told about sore boobs and cramps and the best way to help with the pain. Also about my hormones and how I would get emotional around that time.
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03-03-2012 16:20 #9
Maybe explain how the cycle works if you haven't already - ovulation, luteal phase, etc. I wish I'd known more about it when I was younger. I think it helps to really understand and respect your body's workings.
Otherwise I think everyones covered it - as long as she's comfortable asking you questions I'm sure you'll be fine!
03-03-2012 16:21 #10
This!! I don't know why, I didn't even remember it until I read this, but I remember finding out that I could actually wear light pads that were comfortable because I had a really light flow etc. My Mum automatically bought big ugly pads in ugly packets, and regular/large sized tampons . It wasn't until I was about 15 that I realised there were tiny little tampons and they actually fit! I once tried a regular sized one and was so horrified, it wouldn't even go past my opening at the time so I felt stupid/deformed and just never went swimming with my period as I refused to without a tampon.
So buying different sizes and different types for her to experiment herself in her own time is a great idea
Also, even with the small tampons, I used to use lube/vasoline on the tip to insert it as it could hurt at the begining and end of my period otherwise. I didn't figure out that trick until almost 18 and it changed things so much for me, as I couldn't put in a tampon unless it was the very middle of my period. Maybe you could add some into her "pack" and explain that if she wants to try put in a tampon, putting some of that on the end might make it easier at first to try.
I also second what someone else said about it not being dirty. My Mum never said it was dirty as such, but she would be horrified if she found bloody undies, and when she explained how to dispose of everything she said it with a sort of curled up nose look on her face. So I always felt really ashamed at first!
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