I too hate the crying. We live 35kms from town and every town day I find myself saying, "I HATE TOWN DAYS!!! because at some stage she'll be crying her heart out and there'll be nothing I can do about it because I'm rushing to get from one place to the next before they close. I HATE traffic lights. Sometimes she'll just start to settle from the motion of the car and then we get stopped at traffic lights and she arcs up again.
I talk to her or active listen her as best I can. As soon as I'm able to, I stop and do her nappy and/or feed her and make sure she's not too hot or too cold. Sometimes that does the trick. Sometimes she is ready for sleep and because she is used to going to sleep in my arms it just doesn't help at all and she ends up crying herself to sleep which breaks my heart.
With my other two girls we found they had "magic songs" that worked every time. DD1's song was "This old man" and DD2's was "Old MacDonald". Didn't matter how hard they were crying, as soon as we started singing those songs it would stop. (Almost always, anyway.)
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28-02-2012 16:25 #11Senior Member
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28-02-2012 18:12 #12Senior Member
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You are not alone! I am pretty sure a good percentage of babies hate the car - I can think of quite a few friends who avoided travel because it was torture - and I totally remember getting upset at the traffic lights for stopping momentum
A few little things that helped me
- when they get old enough playing with toys seemed to help
- I had a little light-show thing that played music/lights that attached to the top of the car seat which worked well.
- My sister's baby was not happy in the car until she was old enough to be turned front on. Then she was suddenly happy to be in the car! Probably not much of a comfort to you when your baby is so young...
But, I think that it is generally normal to avoid travelling whenever possible if your baby is distressed about it! Don't feel bad about that! But of course small trips and essential trips are going to have to happen, but I hope that as your bub gets older it gets better
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28-02-2012 18:29 #13
I stop ASAP & sort them out. Even at almost 3, I still stop ASAP.
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28-02-2012 19:01 #14
I always stopped and cuddled DS. Even if I had to then drive 5 more minutes, stop and cuddle again. I was late everywhere for many months because DS would always cry until he turned forward facing. DH and MIL and everyone else thought I was ridiculous. I don't care. Obviously if it was on the highway I wouldn't stop and hold up traffic, but if it was safe I would.
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28-02-2012 19:03 #15
3rd baby, 3rd baby that cries in the car, only thing that works 9/10 times is emergency essence if that doesn't work we stop( obviously if I know she is hungry we will stop ASAP so she can eat).
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28-02-2012 19:36 #16Senior Member
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You sound like a wonderful responsive mama. Good on you. I'd also recommend nursery rhymes and music. It is total BS that leaving a baby to cry doesn't harm them and I found that it certainly made me an unsafe driver. This stage will pass, hopefully before too long! It is definitely safer to have bub rear facing but they do tend to be happier when they can face forward. I don't know if it's true but I think that babies facing backwards can get carsick - they certainly look that way. I also found that once DD got really into books at around 8 months that those little cardboard books with pictures of food or animals would entertain her in the car for ages
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28-02-2012 20:50 #17
Wow thanks to each reply guys I've picked up a few tips will give them a go.
28-02-2012 21:16 #18
my boys were both screamers in the car .. it was the whole way (till asleep) EVERY trip .. they hated the capsule, they hated rear facing .. they hated the car
things DID get better when they were older, and forward facing and sitting up more - but they still get car sick (both of them) so long trips (anything over 20 mins really) are still horrid.
I still remember driving from my mums house (40 mins on a good day) and crying most of the way home .. I was trying to drive, while holding his dummy in while he SCREAMED .. I cried pretty much the whole trip myself - I was at my wits end I hated driving, because HE (DS1) hated driving
There are only so many trips you can 'time' with their sleep time
worst thing - I would pull over .. the DS1 would immediately settle - I would calm him , talk to him .. cuddle him etc - put him back in the seat to continue the journey and the screaming would immediately re-start ..
I even went to someone and had the car seats checked over (to check that there wasn't anything digging into the child) .. I tried light up mirrors, music, dummies, and when they were sitting up I would offer food like basic biscuits .. but for us it was STILL hard in the car ...
you have my complete sympathies OP - I used to be so jealous of people who had babies that slept in the car... my boys would only sleep from exhaustion it was heartbreaking
it DOES get better .. but for some kids it just takes time
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28-02-2012 21:28 #19Senior Member
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- Jan 2009
Cds and singing. Once I had to sing 'da glumph goes the mothereffing frog' about 100 times.
There were occasions I had to keep driving for whatever reason, and it was hard as I didn't let him cry.
I almost had an accident when he was screaming one day as I became distracted. Not fun times.
My son grew out of it, thankfully.
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28-02-2012 21:34 #20
I used to feel like we and she was missing out on so much as we NEVER went anywhere but it was too hard!
Hope it gets easier.
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