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  1. #191
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  3. #192
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    Hi
    hoping to gain some advice.

    My partner had a vasectomy 8-9 years ago after his first child's birth had complications risking both mother and baby.

    I am 40, he is 39. We have kids but none together. We are wanting a child together. And age is a factor. We don't have years.

    We have discussed a reversal and he is willing to do this. However the topic of ivf didn't go well. He considers it UN natural and won't consider it.

    With our ages I thought ivf would be better and that we only want one child. Costs, wait times, etc are higher for a reversal I've been told. No Medicare rebate. And we don't have private health. We are in Newcastle, nsw.

    I'm lost.. how many people have had successful reversals? What were your costs and times? Same question with ivf. And how I might try and tackle this subject again .... Recommended specialists appreciated.

    Thanks

  4. #193
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    Oh that's a hard one you've got to deal with @Plj77!

    In my experience, the length of time between vasectomy and reversal is a big indicator or outcome....ie the longer the time, the less likely reversal will work. We spent $3k and had a technical success, the sperm are there but they're not swimming so there's no way we could get preg naturally. We spent $800 with Primary IVF and were lucky enough to have success first round and we also have another embryo on ice from that same cycle. We don't have Private Health either. There are low cost/bulk billed ivf clinics like Primary. As you can see our costs were minimal compared to other clinics.

    As to his thoughts of ivf being unnatural. I get that it's hard for some to get their head around. Would he be willing to at least speak to an ivf clinic to get a better understanding? You could argue that having a vasectomy and getting the vas deferens severed to prevent pregnancy is 'unnatural' too....we weren't designed to have this happen but medical advancement has allowed this to happen just like ivf

    No judgement on his behalf, it's such an emotional decision but I'd strongly urge you to try and convince him to talk to some professionals to try and alleviate some of his concerns and doubt. If we had our time over I'd go straight to ivf. I don't regret the attempt at VR as it's done now and part of our story but we could have saved a lot of money and time and emotional heartache getting negatives month after month of trying!

    This little boy certainly isn't unnatural, he's all ours, my egg and DFs sperm. We just had some help to get the two to meet can't thank ivf enough for filling that gap in our hearts









    IMG_1493007162.926218.jpg

  5. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to onedaymaybebaby For This Useful Post:

    Felicia  (25-04-2017),Hetty  (25-04-2017)

  6. #194
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    A lot of VRs tend to be "technically" successful, but unless it's only been a short time frame the body just doesn't have the ability to make them like they used to, so they can't make it to the egg, even though genetically a lot of them are still fine.

    We ended up having to do ICSI to get our babies. I don't know how you might be able to get your partner to agree if he's got such a set opinion on the process. Some clinics do open days, and perhaps you could get him to at least agree to counselling so he can express his feelings but also listen to yours.

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    Plj77  (24-04-2017)

  8. #195
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    Quote Originally Posted by onedaymaybebaby View Post
    Oh that's a hard one you've got to deal with @Plj77!

    In my experience, the length of time between vasectomy and reversal is a big indicator or outcome....ie the longer the time, the less likely reversal will work. We spent $3k and had a technical success, the sperm are there but they're not swimming so there's no way we could get preg naturally. We spent $800 with Primary IVF and were lucky enough to have success first round and we also have another embryo on ice from that same cycle. We don't have Private Health either. There are low cost/bulk billed ivf clinics like Primary. As you can see our costs were minimal compared to other clinics.

    As to his thoughts of ivf being unnatural. I get that it's hard for some to get their head around. Would he be willing to at least speak to an ivf clinic to get a better understanding? You could argue that having a vasectomy and getting the vas deferens severed to prevent pregnancy is 'unnatural' too....we weren't designed to have this happen but medical advancement has allowed this to happen just like ivf

    No judgement on his behalf, it's such an emotional decision but I'd strongly urge you to try and convince him to talk to some professionals to try and alleviate some of his concerns and doubt. If we had our time over I'd go straight to ivf. I don't regret the attempt at VR as it's done now and part of our story but we could have saved a lot of money and time and emotional heartache getting negatives month after month of trying!

    This little boy certainly isn't unnatural, he's all ours, my egg and DFs sperm. We just had some help to get the two to meet can't thank ivf enough for filling that gap in our hearts







    Attachment 89885

    Thanks, your bun is beautiful, congrats. Ive been given approx cost of $8000 - $10000 for a reversal, depending on the place.. And i think it was around $5000 for ivf.


    This is one reply i recieved: of course that this is very approx as no tests, etc have been done.

    .............

    One option is a vasectomy reversal. This involves approximately 3 hours of day surgery and costs around $8,000. If you have private health insurance part of these costs may be covered.

    Alternatively patients can have an IVF cycle to collect the eggs and a surgical sperm retrieval to collect sperm. The eggs are then fertilised with the sperm and the embryos are transferred back into the uterus. This option would include the following costs:

    1. IVF with ICSI cycle $9272 (Medicare will rebate $5257)
    2. Hospital and anaesthetist costs for female incl. egg collection and embryo transfer approx. $2000
    3. Surgical sperm retrieval: $650
    4. Hospital and anaesthetist costs for male approx. $2000

    .............

    Looks like they will add up to a simular price. Im thinking the only medicare rebate is 1. as its not mentioned in any other costs. I dont think there are many options in newcastle. Only 2 places that ive found so far. Maybe i might have to look outside of newcastle.

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    onedaymaybebaby  (24-04-2017)

  10. #196
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    Yes it's not cheap is it's! I'm not sure about other low cost/ivf clinics that are close to you (perhaps have a look on google?) but I know Primary ivf have clinics in Melbourne, Sydney and Brisbane. Some of the out of town girls had a bit of an ivf holiday and stayed in the city while having treatment. If that's doable for you it would prob work out quite a bit cheaper than your local clinics? We paid $60 for tests, $600 for day stay and $150 for meds. That was for ICSI. I think it's approx $600 for sperm retrieval for males, done under local anaesthetic

  11. #197
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    Omg!!!! I just took a shot, said remember there is another way.. cheaper by far, less painful, less time off work for him and no worries about if it works too well and would need to redo vacectomy to stop more kids... as we only want one more..

    He knew what i was talking about straight up and

    Im speechless... he said its an option ☺☺☺☺☺☺
    Last edited by Plj77; 24-04-2017 at 16:06.

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  13. #198
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    I looked up ivf too. Newcastle is more than double so much more... sydney is sooo much cheaper... primary ivf bulk bill most of it they r in sydney. Plus theres monash ivf which dont bulk bill but still cheaper than newcastle plus they have super pay when i can access my super if needed to make more affordable...

    Should i book a consult with newcastle even thou we may go to sydney just to hear more about what happens, etc?

  14. #199
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    That's a fantastic start @Plj77!! At least he's prepared to consider it! Yep those fees I paid was Primary ivf in Melbourne, they're all fairly much similar

    It might be worthwhile just having a chat with Newcastle just to get an idea about what the process is from there if your partner freaks out about the cost you've got Primary up your sleeve to seal the deal haha! I'd ring Primary as well and see if they can discuss how the process would work for you being out of town. I know some of the other girls have managed to get most of their initial appts on the same day being that they live out of town. There's a great Primary IVF thread on here too with lots of info

  15. #200
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    I didnt have to even say anything about his view on it not being natural... im stunned... and happy... he has commented twice in the last half hour that i cant stop smiling ☺☺☺

    Now its like where do i start, maybe a few days to let it sink in..

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