Now, - I say this in the nicest friendliest way - but a child cannot consent, and it is the role of an adult and a parent to rebuff untoward behaviour and stop a child from these actions. You did not consent - you were a child.
As for the name business, my borther hated carrying around our fathers name until I remonded him that my father never chose his name, my grandparents named my father. Please look at you naming you child that name as recognition of your grandparents taste in names
This is a very hard road to tread, and I have been there too, and have walked this same road with two of my siblings - is there any chance ant of your siblings is in the same boat?
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24-02-2012 09:01 #11Senior Member
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- Oct 2007
24-02-2012 09:08 #12
I'm sorry to hear you have been here before
I asked my sister about 2 years ago if anything had happened to her as I felt it had happened to me. ( I didn't mention our dad though as I didn't remember that at the time). She said she didn't think so. The best person to ask would be my mum as one of the "memories" I have is of her walking in.
The thing that makes it all so hard is that he is a good guy and our family is quite close. Plus we live in a very small area which will make things very tricky.
I don't know.
24-02-2012 09:26 #13
i would seek professional help.
There are examples of these types of memories being from actual abuse but there are also examples of them being distorted or false memories which are created via a number of different mental processes. There is a fair amount of scientific evidence to show that there is such a thing as a "false memory". It can be made even more confusing when parts of a memory are correct & other parts are false. For a bit of background info on that you could read this http://www.idml.medicine.arizona.edu...ECP%201998.pdf.
It is often not simple to determine & therefore a professional should be able to guide you through the process as they are familiar with research pertaining to this type of thing.
I hope for you, it is not the case that you were abused & if it is the case I hope you are able to heal from the experience.
You are doing the right thing by acknowledging these feelings as they should be investigated.
Last edited by Ulysses; 24-02-2012 at 09:38.
24-02-2012 09:47 #14
i dont know what to say entirely, but something that stood out to me, as WCM said as well.
in no way did u consent to that. you did not know any better, and a child does not come up with the idea of sex to please a parent, without that idea have being planted. how does a child even know about it?
if my child tried to touch me in an inappropriate way, immediately a natural gut reaction would be to stop it, and explain that its not appropriate... and thats what most people would do.
YOU did nothing wrong.
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