Antoher thread got me thinking about weddings, famliy, ex's friends etc and how it can all turn to sh*t at the drop of a hat when they foget its YOUR day and make it about them.
Long story short, I asked my dad to walk me down the isle for my wedding ( a HUGE thing for me to even ask him as we have a very rough history). My mum was ALWAYS going to wlak me down the isle but i asked my dad to do it too(they are divorced).
Anyway, a couple of weeks after i asked my dad to accompany my mum with walking me down the isle he rings me and tells me he doesnt want to, i quote 'I dont want to walk you down the isle if your mum is too. Its either me or mum !!!
Needless to say i was super upset and he made such a fuss about it, there was many words exchanged and i eventually asked him NOT to attend my wedding.
So my question is, Who really scr*wed you over during your wedding/wedding plans??
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20-02-2012 10:33 #1Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2010
*spin off* Has someone you love really scr*wed you over during your wedding?
20-02-2012 10:40 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2008
Our wedding is next year and I asked my parents to do the same but mum said she knows it would mean a lot to my dad to do it so she declined, they are also divorced.
I just have to say though I'd be very upset if somebody carried on like that about my wedding!
20-02-2012 10:48 #3
Subscribing! I haven't been scre*ed over as yet, but I am getting married in less than 3 weeks.
20-02-2012 10:52 #4
Not yet but I've put a few strategies in place to prevent it....whether it works or not.....will just have to wait and see. My wedding is in 4 mths.
20-02-2012 12:22 #5
My step mum. Her and dad (well, dad) paid for our wedding. My step mum took this as a sign that she could blind rotten drunk (BEFORE THE CEREMONY EVEN STARTED) and abuse all of our guests. Almost all of our guests came up to us at our reception with a compaint about her. She flashed my husbands step dad (and not the chest flash either)- while my mil was standing beside him. She did not smile in a single photo (she is literally fronwing and pounting in every single one). The whole reception she was that drunk she could barely stand and continued abusing our guests. She ended up getting kicked out of the resort after we left the reception because she was causing such a disturbance. The next day at our BBq she wasnt much better- she hadnt even stopped drinking from the previous day.
Another one was a good friend of ours was staying in a room a floor below us, in the building beside us (same resort, we could talk to them on the balcony while we were on our balcony). After we had left the reception. hubby and I were sitting on our balcony relaxing (lights off) and taking in the massive day we just had. We heard this friend go into her room and then we heard a male voice. We thought it was a friend of my dads that as at the wedding. Turns out it was one of hubby's best mates (who we had warned not to go near this particular female friend). they were out on her balcony and obviously didnt realise we were on ours... they went for gold and we saw and heard it all... even after we went inside our appartment. Hubby was ready to go over and punch his mate but i convinced him not to. Any way, it caused a lot of trouble later down the track, so they both ended up paying for it.
As much as we were p!ssed off at the time, we agreed not to let these issues ruin our special day. Overall it was perfect, everything we wanted and more and we werent going to let a few selfish people ruin that for us.
20-02-2012 12:37 #6
Makes me feel so secure in our decision to elope. Our families are screwed up enough as it us, I don't want to add alcohol to it (esp when DP and I don't drink anyway).
The only way I would try to work through it would be family counselling for both immediate sides. I think for myself, I have unrealistic expectations on proper behaviour expected.
Last edited by MumDadBoyandGirl; 20-02-2012 at 12:42.
20-02-2012 13:10 #7
My sister was my only bridesmaid. The week before the wedding she broke up with her boyfriend. She spent the entire lead up to the wedding crying, taking up all my mum's time and attention, and did nothing to help me prepare for the wedding. If I'd known she was going to be like that I would have asked one of my friends to be bridesmaid instead. It really took away from me feeling 'special' in the lead up to and on the day of my wedding!
20-02-2012 13:56 #8
My mother threw my wedding dress on the grass infront of DH about 2 months out from the wedding adter an argument - all my family and her friends were promptly in-invited but that meant we had 38 people there, including DH and I.
My maid of honor broke up with her boyfriend the week before my wedding - he just happened to be our photographer.... I have no wedding photos other then ones taken by family/ friends.
DHs aunties and uncles didn't RSVP, we spent weeks following them up, 4 days before we still had no idea who was coming, apparently we should have just known they were coming!
DHs God parents arrived half way through the ceremony, this was after the ceremony starting 30 mind late because we were waiting for them... When they did show up there was no card, no present, no nothing!
My caterers were late and only bought half the food with them, the appetizer package which was meant to contain hot savouries etc was actually cheese and crackers for every SECOND table, no cheese sauce for he cauliflower, no mint sauce for the lamb, no Caesar dressing for the Caesar salad, no butter for the rolls, no cream for the pavlova and no tea and coffee as promised. Not only were the cooks/staff late, they didn't speak English (they were Asian) and they were dressed in short black skirts and grubby tennis shoes, not black pants and black shoes I was lead to believe they would be dressed in.... It ok though, I fought the company during my honeymoon and ended up getting a refund though the office of fair trading
20-02-2012 14:28 #9Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2010
20-02-2012 15:01 #10
My mum was a nightmare in the lead up to my wedding. At my bridal shower she chose to argue with the answers when my BFF held a quiz "how well do you know the bride". My BFF had given me a quiz to answer then the guests were given the same quiz. When my step mum scored more points than my mum, she told my BFF that she was wrong and accused my BFF of changing the answers. When I told mum she was wrong she got huffy and left the shower early. Oh well, we had more fun after she left.
Mum had decided she was going to do the bombonerie for us but when she turned up a week before the wedding she had not put them together. After several days of "I'll get to it" I ended up getting out of bed at midnight the night before they were to be dropped off at the reception venue (three days before) and finished them at 6.20 am working solidly all night. Mum never apologized just said, well that saves me a job.
A few days before the wedding mum (who was staying with us) asked what she could do to help, I asked her to put the towels in the dryer (as storms were forecasted). She hates dryers so she stuck them on the line. I was out running errands, she was at home, forgot they were on the line, they got soaked, the weight pulled the line down and the new towels got caught on the sprinkler system, ripping the towels and pulling the watering system out of the ground.
The next morning when I discovered what had happened I got frustrated and asked mum why she just didn't put the towels in the dryer. Next thing you know, she was hurling abuse at me, telling me that this week was not all about me, that everyone was not coming to see me (excuse me they were coming for my wedding not just because they felt like having a weekend in Canberra) and that she was packing her bags and going back to Brisbane. While there was a break in the hostilities DH raced up the hall into the bathroom for a shower, and I remember following him in asking if I was a bad daughter because I did not care if she stayed or not. In the end I dropped her off at my grandparents hotel as I knew my beautiful Nana would sort it out and I did not have the time or motivation to do it.
I then had a relaxing two days before the wedding as my mum stayed out of sight (but stayed in town).
Mum had bought two outfits for my wedding and asked which one I likes best. She chose to wear the one I said I did not like.
However on my wedding day she turned up at my house before the ceremony with my grandparents. My dear Nana walked in took one look at me in my wedding dress, burst into tears and told me how beautiful I was. Mum followed behind her, stopped in the doorway, flung her arms out and said loudly, "so how do I look?". I just stared at her and my sister (from Dad's marriage, not mum's daughter), went, "isn't she a beautiful bride J?". I could have bottled my 15 year old sister's blood at that moment because even she knew my mum was being a cow. Needless to say my mum never told me I looked beautiful and I refused to say how she looked.
There are no photos of just mum and I on my wedding day and my beautiful sisters, BFF and my dad ran interference to keep her away from me and spoiling my day.
If I had my time over again I would have told her to fly in the night before the wedding, stay at a Hotel and not have let her do anything.
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