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  1. #51
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    What suburb is he actually in?

    Just had a look on Google and everything I've found says he's in NSW?!

  2. #52
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    I agree with what a pp said about parents who aren't as vigilant as some. What about those poor children whose parents couldn't care less where they are or what they're doing? Who looks out for them? I know there's no easy answer but I understand where the anger comes from


    Baby wearing, co-sleeping, booby feeding mummy to one

  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by 3'llhavetodo View Post
    I was horrified to find out from a cop friend of mine that there are over 320 REGISTERED offenders in our area alone....
    .
    But what about the 320 offenders in your neighbourhood that haven't (yet) been convicted of a crime?

    I think too many peopl get caught up in the hype of stranger danger and RSO's and miss seeing the bigger picture

    Your child is more at risk from someone you know and trust, someone you let into your own home than from a stranger or a random RSO grabbing them off the street

    But, seeing the thread is about random RSO's;

    Out of every 10,000 sexual assualts, only 10% - 1000 - will get reported, of those only about 10% will result in charges - 100 - of those only about 10% will result in a conviction - 10 (These figures were explained to me by the cops that dealt with the awful experience of members of my extended family)

    So, if there is 320 RSO's in your neighbourhood, there's another 2,880 that weren't convicted, there's 31,680 that weren't charged and possibly 319,680 SA's that weren't reported. Now, it's possible that the 32,000 SO's in your neighbourhood committed more that one SA, and in all honesty I'd be more worried about the 31,680 that weren't charged than the 320 that were charged and convicted.

    Makes you hardly want to go outside your own front door?

    Tellitlikitis Link

    4 Common Myths about Child Sexual Abuse:

    Myth #1: You believe that since you live in a nice, safe neighborhood, where you know all your neighbors on a first name basis, and your children play with their children, hanging out at each other’s houses etc, that all is well on the home front.
    Fact: Child sexual abuse can happen anywhere, in any neighborhood, in every religion or church group, covering all racial boundaries or ethnic groups, and it certainly doesn’t matter how rich or poor you are. You can live in a beautiful, gated-community of homes worth millions of dollars, and your child is still not protected from being molested or abused.
    According to the U.S. Department of Justice national statistics, 1 out of 3 girls and 1 out of 5 boys will become victims of sexual abuse by the time they reach their 18th birthday. Not only that, but statistics show that children in elementary school are the most vulnerable and likely targets, and children with disabilities have even higher risk factors. That’s not good news for parents with little children, making it vitally important for parents to become educated about the prevalence of child sexual abuse in society today, without becoming completely paranoid about it.
    Myth #2: You have already talked with your children about not allowing anyone to touch their private parts, perhaps even calling those body parts by their proper name, and you believe that’s pretty much all there is to do. You may even have said to your children something like, “No matter what, you can always tell me anything that is on your mind, and I will believe you”.
    Fact: Sexual abuse occurs by forcing or manipulating a child in a way that allows the sexual offender to touch the child’s private parts (which may or may not include penetration), or takes photo’s of children without any clothes on, or when an offender exposes themselves to a child, etc. Children need to be taught about sexual abuse, and they need to learn and know the words “sexual abuse”. Listen, you can tell your children over and over about “good touch vs. bad touch” and proper names of body parts, but if your child doesn’t know the correct terminology, how are they going to know how to tell you they were “sexually abused”?!
    Myth #3: Most sexual abuse cases are committed by people who are complete strangers to you or your child.
    Fact: Closely monitoring the online database for sex offenders who may have moved into your neighborhood simply isn’t enough. 85-90% of child sexual abuse cases are committed by trusted family members and close friends. That includes fathers and mothers, brothers, sisters, aunts and uncles, grandparents, cousins, babysitters, daycare workers, boyfriends of single mom’s, fellow church members and clergy, and so on.
    If I have to write a thousand more posts about sexually abused children, to make it crystal clear who the most likely offenders are, I will write them gladly if it will help just one more parent develop greater awareness to this issue.
    Myth #4: You believe that your child would automatically tell you that he or she had been sexually abused. You may say to yourself, “My child and I have such great communication, that I KNOW my child would come and tell me immediately”.

    Fact: Most sexually abused children do not tell anyone they were abused, even when directly asked by parents or other authority figures. Victims of sexual abuse are often too afraid that the news will hurt their parents, or they are afraid of not being believed, or they were threatened in some way by the offender.
    While some schools offer programs that provide useful information and resources, for children and parents alike, the responsibility of educating children about sexual abuse belongs to the parents. And by the way, sexual abuse does occur in schools too!
    Maybe kids WERE safer when they all played out on the street

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  5. #54
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    Known paedophiles, IMO, are a much lesser risk than those who are unknown. For all you know, your neighbour could be one - perhaps never accused. Same could be said for the principal, the town mayor, the butcher you buy your meat from...etc etc.

    I wouldn't want Dennis Ferguson or similar around me either... I wouldn't want to worry that he's roaming around, trying to figure out a way to get into the life of my daughter or other children in the area... but because we know what he looks like, everyone hates him, etc... he's less of a threat to anyone with half a brain than those we know and trust, who are secretly predatorial and just waiting for the moment to molest our children.

    A lot of the child sex abuse tales told here on BH involved relatives and family friends... which frightens me far more tbh.

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  7. #55
    Tam-I-Am's Avatar
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    It's not the convicted, heavily monitored paedophiles living near you that you have to worry about...it's the ones who haven't been caught yet. And they're everywhere. A child is much more likely to be abused by somebody known and trusted to them than a stranger on the street in any case.

    Quote Originally Posted by Majestic Hiss View Post
    Why can't they chemically castrate paedophiles? I truly believe they cannot be rehabilitated
    Because, besides the fact that it's completely unethical, as witwicky said - paedophilia often isn't about the sex. It's about the eroticism of power. Just because somebody doesn't have the capacity to orgasm doesn't mean they don't have the capacity to harm...and rapists who had been chemically castrated in the US who re-offended were found to use other (usually more violent and dangerous) methodologies to abuse their victims. An erect penis is not a necessity for rape or abuse.

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  9. #56
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    Reading those myths/facts makes me feel terribly sad and completely and utterly helpless. 1 in 3? We're losing the battle to protect our children and it seems there's not a darn thing that can be done. They can't be in our sight 24/7. We have to trust someone, we have to send them to school, and knowing that the biggest risk comes from people within your own circle, statistically, has the potential to turn me into a paranoid recluse. Which would most certainly be unhealthy for my children.

    Why? That's what I don't understand. Why is this such a big problem? What's going wrong? Have we become so selfish as a society that children are now seen as little more than toys for their own use by so many people?? I'm at a loss. Because if these stats are accurate, then we need to rethink our current approach as its clearly not working.

  10. #57
    3'llhavetodo's Avatar
    3'llhavetodo is offline Before we as mothers can look after our loved ones we must first look after ourselves
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    Quote Originally Posted by Etienne View Post
    I agree with what a pp said about parents who aren't as vigilant as some. What about those poor children whose parents couldn't care less where they are or what they're doing? Who looks out for them? I know there's no easy answer but I understand where the anger comes from
    Exactly
    Quote Originally Posted by WorkingClassMum View Post
    But what about the 320 offenders in your neighbourhood that haven't (yet) been convicted of a crime?
    I guess that was kind of part of my point, that's just the ones that have been caught, not to think of the ones who havn't.

  11. #58
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    I could come in here and be all politically correct but I'll be honest..if D.F. moved in to the house next door I would go out of my way to make his life so miserable that he was run out of town.
    I know, I know...paedophiles are everywhere, he is heavily monitored and so on and so on...it wouldn't matter to me. I would never be even remotely comfortable having him live anywhere near me and I would want him run out of town.
    I think it's a disgrace that he is allowed out. The man has no remorse, he will end up in gaol again...after some other poor child falls victim to him. I don't know what the right answer is, but this isn't it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 3'llhavetodo View Post
    Exactly


    I guess that was kind of part of my point, that's just the ones that have been caught, not to think of the ones who havn't.
    I understand the fear but if you read my whole post, and also ones like Tam's and Witickity's - it is not the 320 that have been caught, charged, convicted and monitored or the 31,680 (by extrapolation) that haven't been caught, charged and/or convicted that represent the biggest risk to your child - it's the SO's/Ped.'s that you know, like, love or trust that you don't (yet) know are SO's that are the biggest risk to your child.

    As much as it gall's me that we have to teach our children how to stay safe, empowering our children to be strong and confident people is the best we can do, that and lots of research about what to look for and guard against

    Reading through Blogs and research sites like this helps to keep us (as adults) informed and therefore enabling us to better protect our kids

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    There is always the other side of the coin too. The genuine individuals who actually like kids in a safe and honest way, that are falsely accused.

    What if you gave them a lifesentence (or worse) when they never even touched the kid but circumstance says they could have.

    I'm with you guys on df, but i don't think that sex offenders is as straightforward as lock away the key.

    And for the record... Of three families that had abuse within thier walls... 2 wanted to help the offender rehabilitate the third to pretend it never happened.
    Your individual experience is only that. Your experience in a sea of many others. Don't assume you are the same as everyone else or even the majority.

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