I don't think it's selfish per se but I do think it's 'self centred' meaning that the person can't seem to be able to look outside of themselves. They are focused on their own misery and are unable to even so much as look at what their actions could do to others. They are just so caught up in their own misery. Depression which leads to suicide is a very self centred disease I feel.
Obviously this would be part of the illness, I presume and it's heart wrenching to watch someone go through that, or experience that for yourself.
Suicide has touched our family, and for a long time I was very angry at this family member for being so selfish. I was also angry at myself for being selfish when I attempted at the age of 15. Wasn't until I got older that I realised it was more self-centred rather than selfish and that it really cannot be helped when one is in the middle of it.
I think that if the person is able to see ourside of themselves they can be 'saved' (so to speak). I guess it's what saved me, in a way. But it's finding a way of helping someone do this which is difficult.
I'm sorry I'm probably not being very clear....
I hope people can understand what I'm saying.
View Poll Results: My thoughts on suicide are
- 67. You may not vote on this poll
Those that do are selfish and deserve the worst.
It shows they were weak willed but I feel sorry for them.
Everyone can only handle so much before they snap. There is no shame in that.
None of the above. GFP, you make lousy poll questions
14-02-2012 17:47 #11
14-02-2012 17:55 #12
My daughter was 5 months old when I attempted suicide (and died, twice actually). Obviously she lived with her dad after that as I was in no state to look after her...hell I couldn't even look after myself for the best part of a year after that.
She's 10 this year - still lives with her dad, sees me whenever she wants to (very amicable, close relationship between her father and I these days) and calls me by my first name. She's called her stepmum 'mummy' since...forever.
14-02-2012 17:56 #13
14-02-2012 17:58 #14
14-02-2012 18:02 #15
I voted None of the above. I think it's terribly sad that there isn't a foolproof way to pick up the warning signs early enough to help. I think there will always be a percentage of people who are so determined that nothing anyone does will help. But I think there's also a bunch of people who do end up taking their own lives who could have been helped - with the right words, medication, whatever. I feel sorry that our society isn't better equipped to handle people's differences, and to bring up tolerant, loving humans who look out for each other. (This is a generalisation - some people are obviously very giving and caring, but I do feel for the most part people care for and look out for themselves which leads to those around them doing the same)
14-02-2012 18:08 #16
I think the pain of dying seems more bearable than the pain of living.
14-02-2012 18:08 #17
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14-02-2012 18:19 #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2011
I like this thread - interesting idea.
I only know one person who has tried to commit suicide. He was a very bright man, nice to be around, had everything going for him. Then he got hydrocephalus (basically a buildup of fluid around his brain). It was very serious, almost killed him. He survived, but was unable to do a lot of the things he could do before, and descended into deep depression. He tried to commit suicide a couple of times and has now been living in various hospitals and mental health care units for the best part of 15 years. His life lacks meaning, purpose, fun, intellectual stimulation and close friendship.
When I look at his quality of life and the impact on his family, I think suicide is a logical choice for him. I am truly sorry if this view offends anyone, it's just that he's in so much pain and anguish and this world just isn't ever going to see the best of him.
On another note, I do wonder what the afterlife holds for these troubled souls. I am not religious, but am curious about these things. If there is an afterlife, and if someone does commit suicide, I wonder whether a weight lifts off their shoulders, or if they carry their burden with them. I hope they really do escape their pain.
14-02-2012 19:15 #19
Sorry GFP - I generally try not to choose the 'other' one, but this is just too hard to put one relatively black & white answer
My mum has attempted 3 times, twice when I was about 5 or 6 and once when I was about 23.
I am not angry at her for the attempts. I am angry at her for refusing to see her doctor for a re-evaluation of her medication. I am angry at her for her attitude that all Psychs are the same, that she already knows everything they will say and that talking will never 'cure' her.
She tells me constantly that I am angry at her for trying to leave, that I think she is selfish, and whilst she is entirely self-centered and self-involved, the act of suicide is not what makes me say that. But I'm not. I love her, and I live in fear that she is digging herself deeper all the time, and if I don't watch her closely, I'll lose her. But I'm not angry at her. Just her refusal to get help.
In general, I think suicide is just a shame, and a waste, because even if a person is entirely alone, if they just reach out to someone (even lifeline) they would realize that as a human, you are never actually alone in anything.
I think whilst suicide isn't weak, it takes a LOT of strength to reach out when you're at that point. It's the harder thing, than giving in to 'it's easier to just disappear'. Not that that is an easy decision, nor a weak one.
14-02-2012 19:18 #20Guest Guest
I think suicidal thoughts are an illness and part of depression. I've been depressed, 2 major episodes and I had constant suicidal thoughts out of pure desperation to end what I was feeling, I couldn't see anything positive even reality, it was hard.
I still get depressed but short term depression, it might last a day or 2 and what ive noticed is it 'makes' you think that way, it makes you feel so dark and hopeless, I get tired, I think everything is wrong etc. the next day when I'm clear again those thoughts are completely gone, there's light and everything has a solution, I just feel normal.
When I have suicidal thoughts on these days, I know it's just the depression and I let the thoughts go, I don't 'believe' what I'm thinking is real and it never is. Depression can give you some strange thoughts and outlook on things?