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  1. #1
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    Default BM has taken me on as her new besty and it is sooo draining

    DSD is 13 and is causing a few problems. when with her mum she takes off at night and roams the streets with her friends. she doesn't do it with us. we've got together with bm to discuss rules/consequences and expectations of dsd then also went through these with dsd .
    BM saw her for all of one week in the christmas holidays then already complains how much she is mucking up for her etc keeps texting and ringing me to ask for help and to whinge. it's the same s*** over and over and over. the othe rnight her and dsd had a yelling match at my house infront of my kids. not on!!
    she has left dsd with us for now and says she gives up. not sure where that leaves us. we only usually have her EOW and hlaf hols and 2 full or more weeks per term. hubby is on less thatn half BM salary so we pay no c/s so technically if we had her more she'd owe us.
    today i get a text askign to meet with JUST ME on the weekend to discuss options. not sure what she means but i am worried.

    blOOdy heck i have 3 young kids of my own to deal with, one of who jsut started school so i want to give her my energy and attention not focus on dsd and BM but if i don't help out then things will turn even worse.

    ahhhhhhh

  2. #2
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    I think you need to be clear and tell her what will work for you and hubby not what will work for her or maybe she just turns SD over to you and that way you dont have to deal with her and DS drama (if its even possible to take SD full time) I am not sure why BMs always think they need to come first like the Step mom doesnt have a life of her own. Good luck

  3. #3
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    No one thinks step mums have a life i think.

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using BubHub

  4. #4
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    Yeah I have heard stories where the step mom is expected to do so much and much much more than BM or even dad, just means you are super

  5. #5
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    That would be my worst nightmare come true
    Sorry not much help. That sounds like a huge PITA. Could you just take DSD fulltime(and BM have her EOW), it sounds like she is more well behaved with your family then BM and perhaps would take some stress off of you all?

  6. #6
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    To be blunt, you DO have 3 of your own young children to care for. Do your best for the SD, but your own children are your priority. She has a mother.

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to Clarabelle For This Useful Post:

    musicalmummy  (03-02-2012)

  8. #7
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    well i found out tonight she has told people at the end of last year i punched her. hmmm. nice.
    you are so right that my 3 kids come first. i jsut get scared if i let go and let dh handle sd then all hell will break loose (as it has done when i stepped back, and not saying it to be vain but to point out dh is a push over and i am the wicked step mother) and then my kids suffer as a result

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    Can you just see if she would pass over custody? I mean she seems at the end of her rope. Other than that maybe just dont socialize with her, you dont have to have a relationship with her and you shouldnt have rumors spread about you pretty tacky. Just deal with SD on your own if she is not behaving for her mother that is not your problem let her deal with the problems if she is going to be nasty toward you. Just take care of your kids and your DSD, she is a grown womanshe can take care of herself.

  10. #9
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    Sorry i meant the step daughter has spread that rumour

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using BubHub

  11. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by musicalmummy View Post
    Sorry i meant the step daughter has spread that rumour

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using BubHub
    Oh no so what is BM saying? Hope you guys get this all squared away


 

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