Do YOU think a woman can be a feminist and...

[SassyMummy]

So here's my question.

Do YOU (as in you, personally) think that a woman can be a feminist and still live "traditionally?" By traditionally, I mean perhaps be the homemaker while her husband works. Perhaps she serves him his dinners every meal. Perhaps she spends her days making sure the house is spotless. Perhaps she gets up early to make his lunch for work.

BUT SHE DOES THIS ALL BY HER OWN CHOICE, NOT BECAUSE HE HAS SUGGESTED IT IS HER JOB TO DO SO.

Or do you think a feminist can only be a true feminist if they live equally in every way - perhaps they work full-time as does their husband, they take turns in preparing meals, she would only wash his clothes and iron them if he did something for her in return, etc.

Just some comments elsewhere online made me want ot pose this question, and I know how you all love a discussion about feminism!

[kw123]

I think she can. Feminism is about choices after all, not about a certain way of living. Just my humble opinion

[rainbow road]

Yes, feminism is about being able to choose the way you live your life and not being boxed by expectations society have of you based solely on your sex.

[Boobycino]

Hell yes. If that's what she wants to do.

Not doing so, if she wanted to, is not choice or liberation, it's just another kind of adhering to someone else's expectations.

Feminism to me is about equality and choice.

[Elijahs Mum]

I do, I think that describes me ! I am a successful business owner, but luckily can afford to and choose to stay home with DS, because DH works hard I like to make his lunch/dinners ( I did anyway when I was working so I knew he was eating well!) I do most of the cleaning, but I wouldn't call it spotless! ( except toilets , lawns and garbage DH does that!) he would do more if I asked but to be honest it's quite easy for me to do during the day, I am very independent and consider myself equal in all ways to a man but choose to live as a equal couple with my DH and share all decisions and money , I just happen to stay at home and like to cook for my family!

[MissMuppet]

In my opinion of course they can. I think the important thing is being free to choose your own life path, not have your decisions made for you. Saying women must work or must behave in a certain way in order to have feminist respect is just as bad as saying woman must stay home in my opinion.

I know others disagree, but I guess it depends on your definition of feminism.

[Benji]

Of course. Being a feminist means believing in and advocating equal rights. That doesn't even mean you have to practice it yourself. Feminists can still work in lower paid fields and be SAHMs.

I consider myself a feminist and I work in a low paid, mundane job and still do the majority of child care through gritted teeth.

[FearlessLeader]

Of course. I do believe, however, that if you are going to do this you absolutely need to find some way to ensure your financial independance. However people work that is up to them, but for me while i've been home full and part time, DP and I have made sure that my super will stay the same, which we do by using his wages (but *our* money) to top up my super. I don't believe that you can be equal without financial independance.

[bumMum]

Hmmm .. Being a stay at home yeah for sure.. Because often this is the most convenient option for a woman when you factor in childcare costs and the womans pay, and a lot of families believe children benefit from having one main care provider for the first few years. Do I think you can call yourself a feminist if you bend over to take your husbands work shoes off each day, pick up after him non stop, do all the housework and childcare despite having a capable husband who prefers to play ex box or go to his shed? I don't know. Does a feminist have to practice the ideals she beleives in? Because I think if you are virtually a live in maid then you aren't practicing equality at all. Sure its a nice sentiment to take your husband his evening meal iF he also does sweet helpful things too

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[Lemmings]

In theory yes.

In reality no. There's always people who will look down on you for wanting to do those things saying its against feminism etc etc obviously those people dont know what they're talking about but thats just how it is. A woman in this day and age will always been looked down upon for choosing to do those things...

... then again a woman will be looked down upon for choosing to work as well... you cant really win