I've been working on not feeding my 14 month old to sleep as well.
I started on day sleeps, I'd feed him while the room was still bright, then close the curtains and put him in his bed, and I would sit down next to his bed until he fell asleep. I've recently added reading a book to this routine.
We've also in the last couple of days changed the night routine to bath, boob, teeth, bed, book instead of bath, teeth, boob, bed.
He will normally lay down sometime during the book, and will play with the 3 soft toys that are in bed with him. The average time it takes him to go to sleep is 35 mins. Tonight it was 5, but the other night was an hour and 35.
We have really worked with him do that he knows he is not allowed to stand up - if he stands we ask him to sit bak down and he normally does. We also lay his toys down and say to him "horsey is sleeping, good horsey" and he'll usually copy it.
The eventual goal is to be able to read the book and leave the room without tears.
I just can't bring myself to CC. I know it works for a lot of people, and I am kind of jealous of a friend who can just duck out of the room to put their 5 month old to bed and be back in 1 minute, but it just doesn't work for our family.
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26-01-2012 22:01 #11Senior Member
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- Jun 2010
- Sunshine North
27-01-2012 07:32 #12
At his worst DS was waking hourly and HAD to be fed back to sleep, so I really do know your pain. To stop feeding to sleep I used a very similar technique to Majestic Hiss and Narribri.
Every time he woke up I would feed for a timed period then take him off and rock to sleep. At the start he was pretty unhappy about this and there was some crying, but he was always in my arms - never left to cry on his own. Every couple of nights I would reduce the feed time and keep rocking to sleep - he started getting used to be taken off the boob and protested less and less about it. Then when the feeds were reduced to nothing I would just pick him up and rock to sleep, then gradually went to patting him in his cot.
I won't lie, it took a long time to work - and he still wakes sometimes overnight, but it usually only takes a few minutes of patting and he's back to sleep. If you really want to stop feeding at each night wake up just be prepared for it to take at least a few weeks. Good luck
27-01-2012 11:09 #13Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2011
I'm totally against CC, but I think at 14 months it's quite reasonable to bring in some boundaries around feeding to sleep. Being held with love and understanding by either parent while they cry through the frustration of learning to sleep another way is worlds apart from suddenly being left to cry alone as a tiny baby in my opinion. Having said that, I still feed my 14 month old DD to sleep for every sleep unless DP walks or rides her to sleep on the bike. If that was causing problems of resentment or exhaustion for me then I wouldn't hesitate to make a change. It's not really my cup of tea, but you might find the Aware Parenting approach to sleep interesting.
27-01-2012 11:59 #14
HI Susan Mac
I've just stopped from feeding to sleep my 11mth old DS and it wasn't as bad as what I anticipated. I tackled the daytime naps first by going from feeding to sleep to having him lie on my lap and I would pat him off to sleep. The first time he did protest, but I held him and was still there for him....so he wasn't left alone to cry it out. Probably within 2 days, he hardly protested at all, and he would go to sleep very easily and quickly.
I have just night weaned him as well, as he was waking frequently. I just pat him back to sleep, either in the cot or in my bed. The last week, I've been able to go in and just say "back to sleep", and he lies back now and nods off. Within 2 weeks, he has gone from waking up to 10 times a night, to sleeping from 7pm to 415am without stirring at all....hopefully it keeps up.
My next step is to be able to put him in the cot awake and let him self-settle....
Overall, it was much easier than I expected, and to go from waking frequently overnight to sleep 9 hrs straight is fantastic!
Good luck with whatever you decide to do!
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27-01-2012 13:12 #15Senior Member
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- Jul 2011
That's really inspiring Shirley's mum!
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