Presuming cos you're queer that you've got certain gender roles is pretty damn annoying. Some people do have butch/femme roles and that's valid and not "stereotypical"... any more than two feminine women being feminine together. You're just what you are, most of the time, being queer means you generally examine what society's told you you should be like, and you decide what you are based more on what you *are* not what others think you should be!
Look forward (not) to "so who's the dad" when we have our kiddo. Or "who's the real mum".
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16-03-2012 13:55 #11
16-03-2012 14:00 #12Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2007
So insulting, isn't it. My collegues are very left-wing, usually very open minded, supposedly enlightened and yet we work with a lesbian and they never stop going on about it!! Some of them have to critique what she wears, her haircut and so on.
I just don't see the issue.
She's just a girl I work with!
16-03-2012 15:00 #13Our family is complete!
- Join Date
- Jun 2006
It must be really annoying!
I am doing shave for a cure this year and had one man say 'I'll pay you not to shave it. If you shave it people will think you're a lesbian.' I just looked at him and said 'and? I'm married, I'm raising money for a charity, I'm not doing it to 'get a man.' ' He then tried telling me that he just meant I'd have women hitting on me. Pretty sure the rings on my finger would stop that and if it didn't I can just as easily tell a woman I'm married as I can tell a man I'm married.
The only type I've ever been hit on by a woman was by a very feminine woman...no 'butch' stereotype happening there
16-03-2012 15:16 #14
You know, this is my recomendation:
Have fun with it!
People are going to say it, right? You can't stop them, society will take ages to cease with the questions. At the minute, YOU'RE the one being made to feel uncomfotable. So turn it back on them!
"So, you're the wife in the relationship hey?"
"Yes! In this one I am because your wife is the b!tch when I'm with her!"
"So, she wears the pants hey?"
"Only when she's at work! I rip em straight off her once she's through the door!" Then proceed to go into graphic detail.
"So, she keeps you as the little housewife hey?"
"Nah. It's your husbands insistence on this damn French maid's outfit." Hey, they don't KNOW that you wouldn't, do they?
And so on and so forth! Make THEM squirm! If you need help, I could think of HEAPS more!!
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