Interesting thread here.. My daughter has been through kindy and is starting school this year. She has been bullied.. Then accused of being the bully as a result of physically retaliating.. She would keep getting told to go away and that they didn't want up play with her (two little boys that she was friends with) I told her to ignore them and play with someone else or to tell her teacher. She did all those things first. I also mentioned the situation to her teacher. Was ok for a while... Then hear from a parent that my child is a 'bruiser' and likes to bully the boys! Well I was not happy... The mother of the little boy teasing my daughter had dobbed my child in to the teacher because he'd teased her so much she'd taken matters into her own hands and pushed him, knocked him clean on his ***!
God I was angry...
I did have words with my daughter about pushing though and she got quite upset about the whole thing. I still said it wasn't the best thing that happened but that I want her to protect herself when she is being beaten down verbally!
Hubby and I have now enrolled her into a ruldolf Steiner school so I'm much more relaxed about her not attending a main****** school where she would get lost in the system ... Big sigh if relief!!
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07-01-2012 19:28 #21
07-01-2012 20:05 #22
I am so sad and horrified at reading this thread!
I had a pleasant experience in my schooling years... My DD1 starts Kindy this year and even though I had a good experience, I am worried about her. I cannot believe the age it is now starting.... My DD1 is a confident little girl and hoping this will help her!
I will also be taking on board some of things mentioned here...
I just don't understand why bullying has to occur!!!!
07-01-2012 20:17 #23
DD moved schools in march when we moved here, there is a girl in her class who used to push her around verbally "if you don't play with me I'm telling the principal, if you don't give me your lunch money I'm telling, etc" we spoke to the teacher a few times and she told us yes the girl does it to other kids, and she isn't allowed to play with them anymore. But it didn't solve anything, so then the girl got moved desks, and she has to sit with the teacher at lunch times coz she wasn't allowed to play with anyone.
To me, whilst being protective of my DD, I also felt really sorry for the girl doing the pushing around whilst she was being punished, she was also being singled out in front of everyone, why I thought would make it worse?! As a parent, if I was told my child was the bully, I would be absolutely mortified, especially if they told me she was made to sit out at lunchtime. Burst the same time, I wouldn't really know how to confront it either? Her mum sent money to school to give back to my DD, but I don't think the seriousness was explained to her?
I'm so off topic. Think I'm rambling sorry!! I guess I really wouldn't know what to do if my child was the "bully" but I'd be devastated
07-01-2012 20:23 #24
my son has been at school for two years now, and he has and does get bullied. (he has autism, so an easy target) he does not retaliate at all.
he tells them "stop it, i dont like it"
if it continues he is to walk away and find someone else to play with.
if the bully follows and continues, he is to go and tell the teacher on playground duty, and then when he gets back to class tell his teacher.
if the bully gets physical he is to automatically run to the playground teacher for safety.
the school contacts me when it gets physical, let me know every measure they will take to ensure it wont happen again. the bullies parents get called. they miss out on free play time etc.
it still happens, but my DS feels safe at his school. so thats comforting to me, considering he isnt really able to defend himself. plus he is only 7. still a baby really.
07-01-2012 20:36 #25
That's really sad Diamond. I feel sad reading all of your stories. Kids can be so cruel. I never bullied anybody in school. I was bullied in primary school because I was the tall, lanky, giraffe, so called "loser." I was always very quiet and didn't stand up for myself until I reached year 6. I was bullied in high school as well, even though I was in the "popular crowd." Girls can be such bishes. I ignored them, ignored them and kept ignoring them until one day I snapped and absolutely lost it which was a huge shock to them BUT it stopped them.
I want DS to take self defense classes as soon as he is able to. DH and I will be giving him the same advice as my fil told DH. Give the bully 3 chances and then after the 3rd go, do what you need to finish what they started.
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