If your child were to come up to you and say, "mum/dad, Bob has been hitting me and calling me names. How can I make him stop?"
What would you tell your child? Would you tell them to ignore the bully or would you tell your child to fight back?
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06-01-2012 21:50 #1
Child being bullied
06-01-2012 21:55 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2009
I would try to talk to the daycare/school/other child's parents etc to have someone intervene.
06-01-2012 21:59 #3
What if they were to talk to the bully and he/she continued despite the warnings?
This is all a hypothetical situation. I'm more curious than anything.
Would it change if it were your teenager?
06-01-2012 22:02 #4
I'm petrified of my children getting bullied I was bullied and it was awful, really really awful.
I would first approach the school but then I don't know what the next step would be if it was ignored?
07-01-2012 07:58 #5
That's why I thought I'd start it... I've been thinking about DS and wondering 'what would I do?'
My counsellor also said to me the other day that sometimes you need to be the bully to stop the bully. That's the approach I've always believed in and it was nice to have it said my a professional.. But then it makes me wonder... Would ignoring them be better?
07-01-2012 08:00 #6
Some bullies will respond to being ignored others won't...
Take teenage girls, I've found some of them to be more aggressive if ignored...
07-01-2012 08:32 #7
My DD was bullied by one girl at school. I asked the teacher and principle to not put them in the same class next year which they won't.
I told DD to stay away from her which she tried to some extent. Thankfully DD has great friends who stuck by her.
The principle had a word to the girl and the mother. The girl toned it down a bit.
The mother didn't seem to care because she believe her daughter is an angel and can do no wrong. Then in an after school activity another mother witnessed the bullying and backed me up. And then there was this whole "ordeal".
Anyway hopefully it will die down in the new year. If it doesn't I will take it further with the principle. I will not put up with it. My child should feel safe at school.
07-01-2012 08:56 #8
Last edited by FloatingFairy; 17-02-2012 at 14:00.
07-01-2012 09:45 #9
So would you tell your kids to stand up for themselves and if they get hit, they should hit them back?
07-01-2012 10:02 #10
I was Bullied a lot as a child.. pretty much everyday from Day one of Kindy till My mum finally let me leave in grade 11..
DH & I have discussed how we will handle out child being bullied, the same way we do at work..
Step one: Ignore It's worth a try, sometimes it actually works. Encourage your child as to why to ignore, don't just tell them to ignore the other person.. IE My Manager at work told me to Ignore the person who was bullying me they were probably just jealous as at that time I refused to diet, was (still am) Morbidly Obese. I had met and married my DH in less then a year, Loved my life, was happy, and never let anything get me down.. She however had issues seeing how I could find a husband and she couldn't get her boyfriend of 8 years to even propose. Lesson here: Ignore her, You're better then her and she knows it.
2. Talk to someone one in power: I went to my manager about this girl, but not without A LOT of encouragement from friends, as When I talked to teachers/ my mother at school I felt like I was the one being ignored. Hell one time My mother did try to say something to the school she was told OH The person Bullying her is a second youngest child in a large (4 kids) single parent family from a low socioeconomic background. Apparently that's Different to ME who was the youngest child of a normal sized (4 kids) single parent family where the one parent actually worked cause Centrelink (Then CES) kept harassing my mother as to why she wouldn't ask my Dead father for Child support. But it can work.
3. Remove them from the situation. If all else fails why have them being bullied everyday. There is no reason anyone should put up with that and My mother still won't say why I was never changed school despite repeated begging. She also wouldn't allow me to leave school for TAFE to do my HSC so I left to do a trade course, then injured myself and was unable to preform said trade.. took me another 8 years and doing my HSC at TAFE before I was able to get a full time job of any decent wage.
So if you have tried 1 & 2, they need to realise they either concentrate on what's good where they are, or Leave and go elsewhere.
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