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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by peekaboomummy View Post
    if you are close to tears please bring it up before it grows into an even bigger issue or triggers other issues
    Well... I bought it up with my fiancé in the car on the way home and basically got "who cares what they call you, suck it up and stop being a child, learn to harden the f.u.k up" and "why do you always insult my mother all she does it everything for you and you bad mouth her all the time"


    Well so much for voicing my concerns..... But if I don't say anything it's always "why won't you talk to me" or "what's wrong" .....

    Maybe the whole wedding marriage thing is a bad idea.... Is my partner right or wrong not to see it from my point of view... Should I suck to up ?

    I thought my partner would have been a little .... Compassionate

  2. #42
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    Honestly I'd be LIVID if my DP reacted like that only you can decide what that means for you though

  3. #43
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    I am one of the fortunates who have fantastic in-laws. Even though my girls are not biologically DF's they treat us with plenty of love and support, I'm even having SIL as one of my two bridesmaids and his MIL phones me quite regularly and has been there for me many times.

    EX-DP's mother is a completely different story. Complete and utter b!tch!
    Last edited by brooke88(mum2b09); 04-01-2012 at 09:15.

  4. #44
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    For the first year or 2 my mil seemed to not like me very much, she even told me once that she didn't like that i ''allowed DH to move back to QLD'' after she had worked so hard to get him out of QLD (he was a naughty teen lol).

    Anyways, fast forward almost 4 years and she loves me now lol. i've got DH to get full time work (And stay in it for a long period of time), he's a family man now and has stopped all his stupid behaviour.

    Oh, it also helps that she lives 12 hours away now :P

    But, FIL and i clash ALL the time. he is a @$$hole...

  5. #45
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    I'm also very fortunate to get along with my MIL very well. She and DF are very close, and I think she sees that in the last four+ years we've been together he has really grown up and is more "sorted out" - good job, own house, engaged, #1 baby on the way.
    She could have resented me for taking her darling first born away AND for the fact that I'm ten years old than him!
    Perhaps it helps that they live overseas and we see them only 3 or 4 times a year? Plus they don't stay with us?
    However, me being older, ie only about 14 years younger than her, I can honestly say I really like her and if we had just met another way, I would really like to have her as a friend.

  6. #46
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    I have a great mil! She is very aware of her boundaries and won't even do simple things at my house without asking as she respects it as my space! It will never be the same relationship as with my own mum ( we are really close) but She also gets along really well with my mum which makes it easier to include her in mother daughter activities ( mil only has 2 boys so no opportunity to do girls days) especially when we got married. I'm hoping it will continue when we get out BFP and then baby

  7. #47
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    I get along great with my partner's parents, but my SIL keeps using my mother and it's really starting to pee me off bad. My mother has done everything for her and she has the hide to make up absolute crap about my mother and post it on facebook. I always deactivate my fb because I find it a nuisance so she must think I deleted it, but I sign back on and there's all this crap about my mother on her wall! I am soo p'd off right now omg.

  8. #48
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    I didn't get along with my MIL when I first met her. I think she still disapproves of me in some ways, but not in a disruptive way. We get along pretty well really, in fact I'd say I have a better relationship with her than my own mother when it comes to how I parent DS! Lol.
    She might not agree with how I do things, but she'd never say it to my face unless she thought it was a big problem. She'll suggest things but if I have a reason to say "No, I don't want to do it that way" she's entirely fine with it.

    FIL & DH both agree that MIL & I are very similar. They laughed about it because when we first met we clashed a bit . All it took was getting a bit tipsy together and we ganged up on the men and it wasn't an issue rofl.

  9. #49
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    My MIL and I have an up and down relationship. My DH is an only child and his mother was very hesitant about letting him go, so to speak.

    She was pretty good for the first couple of years but she didn't agree with our engagement, never really said why, she showed up late to our wedding and then cried the entire time. She didn't smile in any photos and complained that 2 of my bridesmaids were in black. About 6 months later we were at a restaurant where she misunderstood something I said and started yelling at me....in public. I burst into tears and left. We didn't speak for a week and then I decided to take the high road and told here that if she treated me like that again, then she would have no place in my life, DH agreed and she apologised. All was good again.

    2 years later we were moving interstate and stayed in their house while ours was being built. And everything deteriorated again as she constantly criticised me, my family, our house plans, our decision to hold off on kids for a while etc etc.

    Anyway, long story short, both DH and FIL couldn't stand it anymore and she got roasted by the 2 of them and her and I had a fairly emotional conversation and now a year later it's a great relationship.

    I really think that it should have been stopped from the start, but hey, things happen. I'm just glad to have it all behind us now.


 

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