This will be a long one, and I will make it 2 posts... sorry in advance, and thank you if you read this all.
I've been feeling SUPER uncomfortable around my neighbours lately, due to numerous issues and just don't know how to deal with it.
DP, DD and I moved from Syd to Per in Oct 2010. Moved in to what we thought was a great street, with neighbours who all knew each other and chatted out the front regularly, went to dinner, had drinks etc.
A few months ago, I finally made friends with a family who are so lovely and have 2 DD's. one being the same age as our DD. Which is great as we really wanted to find people that had kids and similar interests.
Our immediate next door neighbours (couple) are CLEARLY not happy about this, and have made numerous comments about it to let us know that. Things like "Well, clearly we've been replaced" "Guess we're not friends anymore, because you have new friends' etc. (We have not stopped spending time with the neighbours and as they work full time, we see them late arvo/evening anyway)
My friend (S) feels quite uncomfortable coming here, as she always gets stared down if they are home and the female (we'll call her K) has often, come to her car, if we've been out together, taken my DD out as fast as possible and gone to her house, while I get out of the car and say good bye.
There are bigger issues with the male (L) neighbour. L, we found out not long ago, had Glandular Fever. No problem there. We found out when K told us he was going for a blood test to check for that and other numerous things due to being quite sick for a long period of time. I did not know he had been sick and we had spent quite a lot of time with K & L with DD also. L is also a very heavy pot smoker, which I don't want DD exposed to.
DD has had chronic/recurring tonsillitis for the last 11 months of her life and they know the struggles I go through every fortnight when she has it. (DP works FIFO also, so it's just me dealing with it most of the time)
I thought the RESPONSIBLE thing to do, would be to let me know and not invite me and DD over for dinner/coffee etc whilst sick.
A few weeks ago, we were out the front having a chat and K gave DD an ice cube. Fine. DD dropped the ice cube and I said "Oh well, all gone". L, who was drinking a Bourbon and had just had a c0ne, picked up the ice cube, washed it under his bourbon, stuck it in his mouth, then gave it back to DD.
I would not do this to a niece or nephew let alone a neighbours child when I have been sick!!
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29-12-2011 00:10 #1
Neighbours are driving me crazy!
29-12-2011 00:25 #2
I'm also 29 weeks pregnant. Since telling people, 16 weeks ago, there have been way too many comments from L, on my b00bs. But only when DP is away. even when K is sitting right there next to him.
There was one when I was holding our other neighbours DS (5 months old), about how He looked so comfy and L would love to be sitting where he was right now.
Then the other day about how when I sit down my belly pushes them up and I definately don't need a push up bra. There have been many more, but these are the 2 that stick out to me.
I have found myself avoiding them and it is making it super hard for me to even water my front garden as they are both on holidays at the moment.
A few weeks ago, we were told (not asked) that we were going to L's parents place for Xmas Eve... 1.5 hours away, and that we were going in their car... Uh, ok.
Xmas eve comes, and I get this ridiculous thing that I got twice when pregnant with DD, which involves the room randomly starting to spin, like I've had about 25 Margaritas, and any bodily movement making me vomit like crazy. We texted that unfortunately I was Ill and would not be able to go.
A few hours later, DP got a call from a mate, saying to come around (2 minutes away) for a few drinks etc. So he took me with him, I layed in bed in their spare room with DD in a porta cot next to me.
L has tonight sent DP a private message on FB, saying wondering why you felt the need to lie to us and have we done something wrong?
I sent this text to his partner: I'm sorry if I've upset you in any way. I hate confrontation and can't talk about things that make me feel uncomfortable. I don't like people making comments about my body. Especially innappropriate ones. I also don't like that L has spent a lot of time with DD, and afterwards I find out that he's been quite sick. I don't appreciate that at all.
I also don't like feeling horrible for having other friends, when I have moved 4000ks away from all my family and friends. I'm sorry we didn't tell you about Xmas Eve, but I was sick, the decision to go elsewhere was made hours afterwards when I could move.
Her reply was: We are not upset, just disappointed (Why, I don't know... because I was ill?) Especially when there were gifts bought for DD. You were told that L had Gland. Fever when we found out. Not too sure what this has to do with Xmas Eve though. As far as your body is concerned, not too sure about that either, inappropriate comments or not. I'm not wanting this to turn into He said, She said (Ummm... you have been sat right next to L when he has made the comments) Perhaps you should verbalize your thoughts instead of bottling them up.
I'm so tempted to break my lease (which we just re-signed for 12 months), just to get away and not feel so claustrophobic in my own house.
DP is not impressed with any of these events and was actually quite shocked about the response from K.
What the hell do I do??!
Last edited by Turk EnJayDee; 29-12-2011 at 02:05.
29-12-2011 00:54 #3
Honestly I'd probably relocate but I hate confrontation even if it was only a few streets away so I could still be close to other friends and I'd just not tell them
The Following User Says Thank You to peekaboomummy For This Useful Post:
Turk EnJayDee (29-12-2011)
29-12-2011 00:56 #4
29-12-2011 01:34 #5
Any ideas how to break a 12 month lease that we've only signed a week ago? Lol
The possessiveness is what got me too.
And the comment about not bottling my thoughts up. Uh, I said I don't like confrontation, and u can't even talk to your DP about sex or having babies...
29-12-2011 01:46 #6
29-12-2011 02:03 #7
I should add that I've been lying in bed for an hour, listening to them out the front *****ing to the other neighbours about us... Uh, hello, it's 40 degrees, my windows are open and my bedroom i at the front of the house...
Or maye they're doing it on purpose? @ssholes
29-12-2011 02:18 #8
:s oh dear.. Maybe snore **REALLY** loudly including the OTT whistle from cartoons so they can hear you're up.. Would make for an awkward moment
29-12-2011 02:22 #9
29-12-2011 02:27 #10
No but think of how sweetly they will tiptoe around you knowing you've heard it.. Alternative is loudly mutter about how some people have nothing better to do than gossip maybe make it sound like a phone call conversation and you explaining why you're still up despite your poor exhausted pregnant (I hope I'm not mistaken lol) body needing it's rest
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