I was just wondering as I have heard of this but never really knew if it was true or how it worked. Is it possible that both of us could breast feed. That would be lovely as we could bond heaps. has anyone done it, or how does it work... Do you have to take medication
Hope that someone can help us
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27-12-2011 20:17 #1-
- Join Date
- Jul 2010
Can the "other mother" breast feed ?
27-12-2011 20:51 #2
I *think* there are tablets that can be taken to make you lactate without a pregnancy, but don't quote me! But I think I read in a mag a few years ago about the "pregnant man" on Oprah, that his partner took something that allowed her to breast feed.
You could also have the BFing mum express and the other Mum could use a supplemental nursing system. Wouldn't be her milk, but baby would still be at the breast and get fed so would be the same bonding experience?
27-12-2011 20:59 #3Senior Member
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- Nov 2010
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10-01-2012 21:51 #4
This is something that my DP and I are looking into, granted we are probably a little early as we are still in an IVF cycle, but it's good to have these discussions as soon as possible I think.
There are hormones the non-birth mother can take to begin lactation. There's a great article here on induced lactation - http://www.babyzone.com/baby/feeding...uced-lactation
10-01-2012 22:14 #5
Yes, induced lactation in mothers who have never been pregnant or breastfed (even in men) is absolutely possible. It's hard work, but do-able. It might not, however, be optimal - particularly in the first 6 weeks of the bio mum's breastfeeding relationship, as this is the time period during which lactation is establishing, and this is definitely the time period during which the mother's supply is cemented. It can be harmful to interrupt that natural process, including leading to irregular and reduced supply in the bio mum. Breastfeeding is very much a supply-and-demand process (ie the more the baby demands, the more the breasts supply), so preventing the breasts from being emptied is not optimal especially in that early period. Additionally not allowing the baby to empty the breastfeed regularly can cause blocked milk ducts and mastitis in the bio mum.
Much like with dads, breastfeeding is only one way to bond with a baby - there are multiple other ways, like skin-to-skin contact, bathing the baby, changing the baby's nappy, taking care of the baby when mum needs a sleep, having a bath or shower with the baby, talking to the baby, singing to the baby, rocking the baby to sleep, etc etc etc.
Having said all of that - it is possible for a non-bio mum to breastfeed and can be worked out so that it works for all parties. It just depends on all parties involved...
10-01-2012 22:32 #6
Without sounding too ditzy...
...I saw it on Oprah once! A lesbian couple had a baby, and they both breastfed.
10-01-2012 22:43 #7
I've saw on an Ivf show once a bio mum who used a surrogate, took medication before birth to bf her bub after. I thought it was such a great idea!
If I was in your situation without a doubt I'd either want to bf bub if I hadn't carried bub or want my partner to bf if I had if that makes sense? After bf my dd I sometimes wish I could share that experience with dh
16-03-2012 14:42 #8
I thought about this myself, as the non pregnant partner; it sounded superficially appealing to me. But breastfeeding is a hell of a process, sometimes painful, and supply feedback loop extremely finicky re regular times and amounts. Also, I've never heard a cis man bemoan not being bonded to their kid via breastmilk, so I think that's not the central issue for me.
Gf and I have joked, once baby arrives, that she'll take care of the top end and I'll take care of the bottom end. Still not 100% sure about that...
16-03-2012 14:45 #9
It's definitely possible, but it's hard work.
We've decided that bio mum will breastfeed but hopefully work out a way where DP can do some feeds with EBM in a bottle after we've established supply and a breastfeeding relationship in the first few months.
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