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  1. #1
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    Default how on earth do you disipline the teen that keeps running away

    last week i wrote about feeling drained with sd (13yrs old).
    so on sunday her mum, my dh and i get together to form set rules for both households and proper consequences and rewards. that night she has her first night in a couple weeks with her mum as her mum hasn't wanted her there because she keeps running off in the middle of thr night
    first night she runs off of course but comes home eventually.monday night her friends hang aroudn her house til all hours such as 3am and her mum is constantly checking to make sure she is there then rang the cops who came and picked up the other girls who both got fined $250
    last night we get the phone call at 3am to say she did it again. left a message that said don't call the cops i am old enough. after much anguish she was located at about 130pm. so we all talked with her and told her how disappointed we are and how worried sick etc. she has no explanation of course except to lay all blame on us for beign strict and not letting her out.
    it is causing so much strain on our marriage. dh is happy to let me carry on doing everything but coem the moment i voice how i am eeling abotu her doign this stuff he is down on me

  2. #2
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    I have no idea, but wanted to send you some hugs

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Guest1234 For This Useful Post:

    musicalmummy  (22-12-2011)

  4. #3
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    I feel for you that she is putting you all through this! I think a counselor would be able to help get to the bottom of her selfish behaviour and support you with strategies.

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    We've had this cr@p with my niece for the last 4 years, its SO hard so BIG legally there's nothing you can do, my sister has called docs the police everyone and NO ONE will help her.

    All I can suggest is get her into some sort of councelling ASAP. It's very very hard and It will push you do the very edge, but she needs you do stay strong and not show her that you can be walked over.

  6. #5
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    she had her first psyhologist appointmnet on monday.
    i am thinking dh need counselling soon

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    I just realised I never answered anything about discipline. we noticed that the harder we tried to discipline her the MORE she rebelled, I know its hard but try not to be TOO forceful with her because it will probably make her worse. Remove friends perhaps taking her to and from school if you dont already take phones away that sort of thing.

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    Quote Originally Posted by musicalmummy View Post
    she had her first psyhologist appointmnet on monday.
    i am thinking dh need counselling soon
    This is excellent. Yes DH and all involved will probably need to see the counselor at some stage too so everyone is involved in a solution.

  9. #8
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    i was meant to write dh and i need it for our marriage. lol
    we tried the nice approach and not being strict or harsh etc and she walked all over us

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    This was my 14 year old SIL least year when she was thirteen too (must be something about that age). There wasn't much anyone could do, police wouldn't help. Although my MIL was advised to talk to the youth liason officer at the local station. She did eventually grow out of it, perhaps it was all puberty related or something. The only thing that I think may have helped would have been to remove her completely from the situation as in far away enough from where she knows any friends within walking distance.

    I hope she starts to behave soon.

  11. #10
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    Hard to remove her. We tried banning her but it didn't work so we tried the opposite approach and let them see each other but only at our house. Locks have been put on at her mum house.
    The thing most upsetting is Dh and i not talking

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using BubHub


 

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