Why is it that everyone thinks if they have their kids close together the will be "good mates" while growing up? Ive read several times about how people want their kids to be close in age for this reason.
Me and my brother are just over a year apart. I hated him for most of my child/teenage years. Same with DP, his brother is 2 yrs younger then him and they did not get along.
My friend has a sister who is 5 yrs older then her and they have been super close their whole life.
Why is it they think because they are around the same age they will automatically become best buddies? It makes no sense?
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19-12-2011 20:37 #1
Why does everyone think if their kids are close in age they will be best friends?
19-12-2011 20:40 #2
Makes no sense to me either ... There's 14 months between me and my sister and we fought like arch enemies growing up ...
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19-12-2011 20:42 #3Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2010
I guess it depends on the family then - personally I don't understand siblings not liking each other as children. Isn't that something that parents need to be on top of - fostering respect, caring and love of each other?
I guess the assumption of the closer in age the better mates they might be is because they will be similar in age and therefore might be into the same things at the same time, have mutual friends, interests, or at least an understanding of one another.
19-12-2011 20:44 #4
I don't think it is the same with all kids. I am close in age to my sister, and we were best friends (and still are). We played everything together... I guess that is why? Most people think because they will be at the same stages at the same time and interested in the same games/toys? I know that is how it was for us. Whereas my girls have a bit of a larger age group, and DD1 will get frustrated as she will be trying to play a game and DD2 will wreck it, as she is too young to understand.
I know it doesn't guarantee they will get on though. But that goes for siblings full stop.
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19-12-2011 20:44 #5
My DH is 7 years older than his brother and they weren't close when they were younger. They are now though.
I cannot comment as I'm technically an only child lol
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19-12-2011 20:45 #6
I think it's more a case of people aspiring to have their close gapped children be 'best friends'. *A lot* of people tell you you're 'crazy' and the like when you have babies close together, so maybe it's just a defence mechanism to those sorts of comments? Who knows.
FWIW, there was 15 months age gap between my older brother and I and we were, and still are, incredibly close. My next sibling was a 3 year gap from me andwe weren't close at all. It's just one of those things I
19-12-2011 20:46 #7
19-12-2011 20:48 #8
for me it definitely didn't happen that way.
but my adopted sisters are biological sisters and they're close in age and very close friends.
19-12-2011 20:49 #9
The sibling i got along with and was super close to was my sister who is 11 years older then me.
Pretty much everyone i know who had a sibling close in age hated them. Even if they were going through the same "phases" the just wanted to tear each others throats out.
Also, my parents tried to teach us to be kind, caring and love each other but i still hated my brother
19-12-2011 20:50 #10
My younger brother and I are roughly 18 months apart. We're good friends. He's my only sibling, And we were really close growing up. We did fight heaps when we were kids. As most do?
I get your point though. My two are roughly 22 months apart. It's a bit too soon to tell atm. But I can only hope they have a good relationship. How they are raised may help. But my brother and I didn't have the best upbringing, and we're quite close. Who knows really. I guess it's up to them at the end of the day.
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