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  1. #451
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    Oh fortitude that's the million dollar question how do we do it??? Hmm well it's never been an easy journey you know I went into my first cycle thinking there is nothing wrong with me other than not having a partner so I will have no problems well now it's 5 collections and over two years later and I am just starting to question if this will ever work?? But I will give u a great laugh I was so confident when I started that I went out and purchased everything I would ever need for a baby!! (im a shopahollic)It's very funny my house has stuff stashed everywhere!!! I even have two prams (yes I have lost the plot lol) but u know I'm heading in for a transfer today with no expectations at all to be honest I am already thinking about the next cycle(which I think will be my last). So not sure if any of that helps you probably not but I think you will know when your done and you are only just beginning my only advise is be very aware of your moods on the medication and let everyone in your house know as it put a lot of pressure on your partner and your family. ( I have seen one of my best friends nearly loose her marriage from the pressure of Ivf) not sure if any of that helps but it's my story oh and the girls on here will get u through and listen to shi@ that no one else can even imagine you go through unless u have been on the Ivf rollercoater xxx

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    Fortitude  (14-04-2012)

  3. #452
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fortitude View Post
    About 2 weeks before our final appointments prior to commencing IVF.

    I think what is doing my head in already is not knowing if I will go through all this and be no better off than I am right now. Part of me is scared that it is all too late and that the baby boat has sailed off without me. Another part is hoping that I somehow manage to leap from the jetty and clamber up onto the boat in the nick of time.

    Wondering how people tackle IVF and keep motivated rather than crushed? Any tips or wise words?

    Fortitude
    my first few cycles I was obsessed... treated it like my second job... I think that is what got me over the line.. I just kept plodding until I got the result. I had my vitamin regime and tried to eat healthy. I kept myself busy doing lots of domestic jobs and working hard. I always tried to do all the physical jobs prior to the 2ww... more important since its just me.
    And I was always thinking ahead... I always had plans for the next cycle during my 2ww and I was constantly on the net looking for things that may improve the egg quality. I always had an appointment with the FS for a week after my beta if it did not work, I always had the packet of birth control pills(bcps) ready to go onto as soon as AF arrived... in that way I found that when I got a bfn I usually allowed a day or 2 to grieve and indulge and then I was back to planning again. I also would set myself up more for it not working .. have all the AF stuff ready, buy my comfort BFN food... I think that this helped a lot as I was not living the super high expectation that a lot of people have. Speaking of this you will find that family and friends have an unreal expectation of IVF working first time and you having twins... in reality us oldies have anywhere between 10-35% chance of working.. which is pretty good odds in my books.
    And now Im doing it for a second time I find that my attitude has changed again.. Im still the same obsessive about my vitamins and try and eat healthy, but my attitude towards a bfn is not as crushing as it was without a child... and while for DD I had no limits on how many cycles I would do, for #2 I have a 2 fresh cycle limit and what ever frozens.... mainly because I use sperm from the usa which is very expensive and Im using a lot of extra drugs (saizen+luveris) which is very pricey and it now comes down to cost benefit with the money I spend is taking away from DD and her education/holidays/ nice house.. (which we need as I live in essentially a 1 bedroom townhouse (2nd bedroom has flatmate).

    Im sorry if this is a bit babbly...sleep deprived...

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    Fortitude  (14-04-2012)

  5. #453
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    Hi ladies

    Remember me? Been MIA for a while so I can try to let all this baby stuff go for a while... guess what... it doesn't work... still think about baby stuff, but maybe not quite as much as when I was on BH everyday.
    I have been following all your posts though thru email updates, so cheering and commiserating from the sidelines.

    Sunny, I'm so sorry you had to have that failed cycle before they found out what could be the issue...after all that waiting! Hopefully you've got some answers and treatment for it now?

    Micca, I don't know how you stay so focussed and +ve really. You're an inspiration. GL for this cycle.

    Leannep, sorry you only got 3 fert, but it only takes 1 remember. GL for tsfr today. Hope at least one of them sticks . I know how you feel about giving up tho...

    DJS, Don't lose hope. As Leannep said, you'll know when its time. We thought it was def time after our last mc last month, until Obs threw a spanner in the works with another idea... now we're tossing around whether to risk another mc or not... bottom line is we just want to make sure we've tried everything so we can have no regrets.

    Petrof, so sorry you had just a dodgy cycle. I really feel for you. Who is yr FS? I'm in Bris too. My FS is John Allan at Wesley. I had an appt for Warren DeAmbrosis on 7th March but cancelled cos I was preg.... then mc a few days later! Don't want to wait to get to the end of the waiting list again so prob won't make another appt with him now. He definitely has a good success rate tho, so might be worth it for you? Have you been doing acup? This can really help with eggs. PM me if you'd like details on my acup.

    Disney, as I just mentioned to Petrof, I strongly suggest yr MIL tries acup if she hasn't already. 3mths of acup to get everything working well (takes 90 days for eggs to cycle to ovulation apparently), then do in conjunction with ivf. Personally I've found that ivf and acup haven't worked for me on their own, but when done together, I've had 3 out of 3 pregnancies (unfortunately all mc but that's another issue)... by the way 2 of those 3 cycles were only iui not ivf, and the ivf gave me my first & only frosty as well... so the combo is definitely the recipe for success for me.

    Lilbirdy, massive congrats on passing the halfway mark! I'm so happy for you. You're incredibly lucky

    Fortitude, GL for your first cycle. We all start a bit worried, not really knowing much, but soon you'll be a pro too . Who knows, maybe you'll be lucky first go? Regardless, if this cycle is not the one, just know that they learn from each cycle how to tweak it for more success next time. As everyone's different, protocols vary so much, so if you've got a good fs, he/she'll know how to improve the odds a little next time (it is a bit of an odds game I often think...)

    Hi to everyone else... I'm sure I've missed someone - sorry. Hope you're all going well.

    AFM, really trying not to focus on babies, but it's difficult when they're all around. I find myself not wanting to be very social these days, so lucky my friends contact us and invite us out or we'd be hermits. I just 'put on that happy face' and join in the chats about the babies,etc, then start breathing again when I get home (how bad is that!)
    My acup is currently getting married in Israel, so won't be back til next month. Thus I'm on a nice break from babymaking efforts. We thought it would be nice to be able to have sex whenever we wanted instead of on schedule, but unfortunately the last mc made my body go haywire and I've had about 3 periods (or similar) in the last month. So over it all (down there). Waiting for a 'normal' period now so I can work out where I'm at.
    Back at gym, walking up the stairs at work at least once/day (10th floor!), walking the dog daily.... surely this extra fat has to burn off eventually??
    Anyway, better get going. Just wanted to drop in and say hi. Take care - I'm still keeping tabs on you and hoping we all get some success REALLY soon!

  6. #454
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    Lilwish fantastic to hear from you how could we forget you glad your all good and enjoying the sex lol take care and keep us posted as to what's happening

    Afm I just had my two transferred there was a 9 cell and and 8 cell so fingers crossed??? I have had my two accupunture sessions and now I'm home resting again yahoo

    Have a wonderful weekend everyone

  7. #455
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    lilwish.......we will never forget you sweetie... I know you can make a beautiful baby but sometimes the road is just so hard. Im glad that you are getting over your MC and beginning to have some normal life...it is so hard though and ironically as you say babies tend to be everywhere when you dont want them to be. keep dropping in and if you want to peruse my updated vitamin list its on page 41..

    leanne...woohoo on the transfer...those sound like some great little embryos.. snuggle in little ones... leanne wants to be your mummy....

  8. #456
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leannep View Post
    But I will give u a great laugh I was so confident when I started that I went out and purchased everything I would ever need for a baby!! (im a shopahollic)It's very funny my house has stuff stashed everywhere!!! I even have two prams (yes I have lost the plot lol) Well I must be a little like you- I knitted a pair of booties. Hope they don't torment me when I get a BFN. So I don't laugh at all, I think you must feel so torn (((HUGS)))
    I know I can be a moody cow at the best of times, so I am sure my family are in for a 'treat' LOL with IVF moods.
    Just today I thought about things, I have been wanting this for 12 long years, so I guess if I have to wait I will wait. If things never work, I am no worse than now, right?

    Fortitude

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    Leannep  (15-04-2012)

  10. #457
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    Due to the fact that I am currently recovering from unrelated but major surgery I am rather preoccupied with endless physio ATM- so I am hoping this will prove a good distraction from some of the pressures and stresses of IVF. Either that or it will tip me over to insanity (INSERT MANIC LAUGHTER HERE)

    Quote Originally Posted by micca View Post
    So what advise do you have to "improve the egg quality".

    Sounds like a plan! thanks for that tip: buy my comfort BFN food...

    We have only just told our parents, and won't be telling friends- I was quite candid about "IF" things work and emphasising that they may NOT work, so I hope they will support us rather than harp on about when :family and friends have an unreal expectation of IVF working first time and you having twins... (I am only allowed 1 due to my preg history) in reality us oldies have anywhere between 10-35% chance of working.. which is pretty good odds in my books.

    Thanks for your thoughts!
    Fortitude

  11. #458
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    Quote Originally Posted by lilwish View Post
    Fortitude, GL for your first cycle. We all start a bit worried, not really knowing much, but soon you'll be a pro too . Who knows, maybe you'll be lucky first go? ((((PLEASE let me one of the lucky ones.... you never know right?))))Regardless, if this cycle is not the one, just know that they learn from each cycle how to tweak it for more success next time. As everyone's different, protocols vary so much, so if you've got a good fs, he/she'll know how to improve the odds a little next time (it is a bit of an odds game I often think...) Thanks for that tip- helps me undertsand how it works- eg tweaks etc

    I hope things take a positive turn (a BFP turn infact) for you really soon.

    Fortitude

  12. #459
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    Hi girls just wanted to jump on and say I hope u all had a great weekend

  13. #460
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    for some positive news from you all this week girls.

    Leanne.. i know i am supposed to down play the wait...but i haven't made it to that stage yet and am very excited for you.. i am hoping that the fact that you checked in earlier today and haven't mentioned anything means you are feeling well and all is going well for you... oh and i am still giggling (with you of course) about the 2 prams ... was it a two for one sale or were you trying to accessorise your prams with your outfits? (please insert tounge in cheek here)

    chook11... sorry to hear you have follie issues also... glad to hear you had one again.. is the few month wait to let your body get back in sync or hoping you will build up more than one?

    micca... i was starting to worry about the lovely look of bruises and puncture marks on my belly on the beach over easter weekend with 2 injections a day... i imagine you must be looking a treat by now.. i hope your scan went well today..

    lilwish... thanks for your thoughts.. i am currently seeing dr tronc... i was disheartened last week, but had an appointment with his friday and i am feeling a lot better about it all... i still have an appointment with dr warren deambrosis for the end of june tho.. i am so sorry to hear of your mc.. and what terrible timing! i have been doing acup for about 3 months now.. i quite like her she seems to be very caring.. i am with you about babies being everywhere..it is odd, that i can deal with my friend's newborns but other people's i dont know turn me into a little green monster (oddly my husband is suffering from this also)..

    fortitude... it sounds like you have so much on your plate you poor thing.. i hope all comes together with everything so you can dive into the ivf strong...

    sunny.. i hope all is well?

    afm... i am feeling much better about my fs... had an appointment with him on friday.. he appologised for not being there, showed me where his receptionist had tried to call me numerous times on thursday (i can only blame vodafone as i have had many friends complain they cant get through to me when i should be available)... he seemed genuinely upset that i didn't have any eggs in my follies... he suggested a month off to take a breath and recover as the 2nd cycle back to back after the first seemed to take it out of me physically and mentally much more that the first... he has suggested donor eggs (which my husband is a little anxious about)... i have already had a few people offer their eggs to me over the last month as they were aware what had happened in the first cycle with only one egg that wasn't strong enough... but they are all too old also or have just given birth in the last week and wont be able to do it for some time... my fs has offered to waiver the gap as he is aware that i am uninsured (so it will be covered totally by medicare) for his services for the next cycle which i thought was a lovely and genuine offer and has suggested we speak to the fertility clinic about getting a discount for the next cycle as we have had 2 cycles and haven't made it to transfer yet??
    my husband seems a little spooked about donor eggs as he is worried that if we use someone's eggs that we know they will be looking at the child for the rest of their life wondering 'what if'.. i would like some similarities to my family if possible (but am very aware that it just may not be possible). the only person that is related to me that has similarites to me that isn't too old is my niece and i am too scared to ask her as she is only 22 and hasn't had children and my husband and i are both worried it would be too much to ask of someone here age...
    our fs has nicely offered to ask a couple of women that he has met through egg donation from other women if they would help us out....
    so... we are currently taking a month off.. i have gone back to work, given up on the no alcohol, no coffee, no chocolate and no jogging regime... it clearly isn't working for me... i have had sharkeys healing clinic suggested to me for a herbal tonic for while i am off ivf.. but i seems fairly expensive and on the goldcoast... my acup has also offered a herbal tonic she can tailor for me so i am trying to decide if i travel to the goldcoast and pay the extra cash or give my acup tonic a try??
    so back to work so i can pay off the debt i have worked up cocooning myself for the last 2 months making ivf my job and depriving myself of everything i enjoy... so.. i am going see how we go... if after a month my husband hasn't come around to donor eggs i will try the fs's 2nd suggestion of a natural cycle with clomid, but he has come around to the hgh and i will be continuing the testosterone cream and dhea of course...

    hope you are all doing well and are feeling strong.
    P

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    Leannep  (17-04-2012)


 

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