+ Reply to Thread
Page 8 of 9 FirstFirst ... 6789 LastLast
Results 71 to 80 of 82
  1. #71
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    The 'Gong, NSW
    Posts
    2,624
    Thanks
    1,671
    Thanked
    374
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Danni~ View Post
    Hubby also does
    DH- "hey look a butt for"
    Kids- "what's a butt for"
    DH - "poopin silly"

    I love dad jokes!!!
    My dad would do the same but with piecost.
    Dad- "hey look a pie cost"
    "Whats a Piecost
    Dad- "About $2"

  2. #72
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    431
    Thanks
    54
    Thanked
    95
    Reviews
    0
    My DP is the king of corny jokes. You cannot have a conversation without one slipping in. The most annoying thing is it's catching:

    DD (12 years old) is holding DS (14 months). DD: "Mum, can you take him, he's heavy!" Me "He ain't heavy, he's your brother."

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to aLittleLoopy For This Useful Post:

    naebie  (01-11-2011)

  4. #73
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Baldivis
    Posts
    1,006
    Thanks
    148
    Thanked
    240
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    My dear dad has a few, not really jokes but still "him".
    - here for a good time, not a long time
    - see you in a soup and we will have a pea together
    There are others but I can not remember them.

    I always tell DD that she makes a better door than a window

    Love all of these too

    I remember my dad calling me over when I was little and asking if I wanted to see china. He would then proceed to pick me up by my ears and ask me if I could see it. I never saw china but did see lots of stars

  5. #74
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    35
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    47
    Reviews
    0
    My Dad was the king of corny jokes and sayings before he died. Some of his favourites included:

    Him: Knock Knock (he used this one after I got crabby with him for something, and was giving him the silent treatment)
    Me: Whose there?
    Him: Lettuce
    Me: Lettuce who
    Him: Lettuce be friends

    If someone done something really, really stoooopid he would tell you to stand up and give your brain some air. (off topic sidenote, but my younger sister is in her 20's, and up until LAST WEEK she never understood what he meant by this one, I had to sit her down and explain it S.L.O.W.L.Y to her)

    If brains were dynamite you'd be the safest person in the whole damn universe

    He also used pretty much every other one listed in this thread

  6. #75
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Near the ocean
    Posts
    4,834
    Thanks
    97
    Thanked
    270
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by naebie View Post


    Another dad joke
    Me: Where is mum?
    Dad: She went mad so we shot her

    And another:
    Me: Where are going?
    Dad: Mad! You wanna come?
    These are regular jokes! also many others.

    My dad also used to come home and take of his belt and say "ive hear you guys where naughty today- time for a belt-ing"

    He thought it was Funny as. Before we were old enough to figure it out, we used to scatter (because we probably were naughty that day) and hide in our room. I always wonder why my older sister and parents would just laugh at all us younger kids.
    Mum said it was lovely because they would get 20min alone time before one of us crept out.
    .
    Last edited by Bank; 01-11-2011 at 20:07.

  7. #76
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    356
    Thanks
    11
    Thanked
    42
    Reviews
    0
    My DH always has dad jokes for example

    When we are explaining something and say "well..." he says "deep hole with water in it"

    Same with the following:

    "So..." "cheap Chinese labour"
    "What?" "unit of power"
    "uuummm..." "leg"
    "Hey" "horses eat it"
    "I was thinking..." "uh oh that's dangerous"

    And if he does something or says something cheeky and I say "that's not nice" he says "wasn't s'posed to be!"

    And my dad used to tell these jokes:
    "what do you call a deer with no eyes?" "No idea (no eye deer)"
    "what do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?" "still no idea"
    "what do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs that's having sex?" "still f**king no idea!"

    Sent from my HTC Desire using Bubhub
    Last edited by Raff; 01-11-2011 at 23:00.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to Raff For This Useful Post:

    Shoopuf  (02-11-2011)

  9. #77
    Birdistheword's Avatar
    Birdistheword is offline Frightened little child, bird is the word!
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Port Macquarie
    Posts
    338
    Thanks
    81
    Thanked
    79
    Reviews
    0
    I have another:

    "Dad what is for dinner?"
    "Sh*t on a stick"

    When we said "ta" instead of thank you
    "Tar's what's on the road, why are you thanking that?"

  10. #78
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    952
    Thanks
    212
    Thanked
    225
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    My dad says alot of these and a few more.

    Me:"I have a runny nose"
    Dad: "And feet that smell too!"

    Me: "Ok well I'm off" (leaving their place)
    Dad: "You look alright but I was wondering what that smell was!"

    Me: "Excuse me?"
    Dad: "Did the first time we saw ya, Second time we couldn't believe our eyes"

    I think I'm the only one in our family who laughs at his jokes.

  11. #79
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    1,512
    Thanks
    475
    Thanked
    493
    Reviews
    6
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Oh a dad one
    Me: 'where you going'
    Dad: 'see a man about a dog'.
    (whenever he went anywhere).

  12. #80
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    in a glass case of emotion
    Posts
    12,468
    Thanks
    1,200
    Thanked
    8,239
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by northern View Post
    Gold!
    No...Iron

    My dad is full of them.

    Me: I'm thirsty
    Dad: Hi, thirsty, I'm Friday!

    Me: I'm hungry
    Dad: Hi Hungry, I'm Germany!

    Me: Is it going to be cold tonight?
    Dad: Yes, and dark too.

    Most embarrassing: when I go to my local Chinese restaurant with my family, they offer you a hot towel at the end and my grandpa always says "No thanks, I'm full." Gah. Keep it in the family, Pop!

    Oh - and if I fall over or something: "Next time you trip, send me a postcard!"


 

Similar Threads

  1. Motherhood: The Shameful Secrets
    By London in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 500
    Last Post: 30-05-2017, 08:29
  2. Routine confession
    By bigZ in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 13-06-2012, 22:58
  3. I have a confession to make...
    By sunnyflower in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 27-03-2012, 20:29

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
FEATURED SUPPORTER
Prams and StrollersLooking to buy a pram or stroller? :: Viewer reviews of prams :: Pram Buyers ...
FORUMS - chatting now ...
Neighbours 30 years - 2015Movies / Music / Books / TV Chat
Do people suck...?General Chat
When should I test? TTCPregnancy Tests & Help / Support with Results
❤Joyous June/July TTC!❤Conception & Fertility General Chat
REVIEWS
"Made bed time less anxious"
by Meld85
My Little Heart Whisbear - the Humming Bear reviews ›
"Wonderful natural Aussie made product!"
by Mrstwr
Baby U Goat Milk Moisturiser reviews ›
"Replaced good quality with cheap tight nappies"
by Kris
Coles Comfy Bots Nappies reviews ›