I have smacked ds out of pure frustration/exhaustion ... And every time ive done it a piece of me died. It's the complete opposite to how I want to parent but I realise that I'm fighting a battle against years and years of conditioning from my father and others around me ...
It's a hard battle but I'm slowly winning and im smacking my son less and less ...
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23-03-2012 12:31 #91
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23-03-2012 12:35 #92
IMO until its not effective anymore. DS gets a smack on the hand of backside if he is naughty. It's the noise that he doesn't like more than the pain as he only really gets a tap.
23-03-2012 12:59 #93-
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
At the shops yesterday DS ran away and nearly got run over by a car in the carpark. He usually gets a smack on his nappied bum, but I was so exhausted from running after him, that the smack ended on his thigh instead.
He wasn't hurt, mainly shocked. No crying though.
Yet when I put him in the stroller, I saw my handprint on his thigh. I wanted to burst into tears, I felt that guilty and horrible
My best friend was with me and I said she must think Im a monster. She said she knows me and it was meant to be on his nappied bum, not his leg.
Its an accident. She reckons as long as he's not crying, its more the action and the sounds that shocks them and stops them with their bad behaviour.
23-03-2012 13:12 #94
Wow! I went to reply to this thread and realised it's an old one and I replied 6 months ago... How my opinion has changed!
We don't smack anymore I now realise it's something I never want to do again and I'm quite ashamed that I used to.
23-03-2012 13:25 #95
I did smack a few times in the early days of the terrible twos when I was trying to work out how to discipline my suddenly challenging child. When he then started smacking me back and role played smacking his toys I stopped immediately. How do you explain that smacking is wrong when you smack yourself? Makes zero sense. No brainer to me
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just her chameleon (23-03-2012)
23-03-2012 13:31 #96Junior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
back to original question
Hi, I have a son who has not long gone 8 and a son not long gone 5. I must admit that I did smack often with both until about 2 years ago. Then as my eldest got more mature and I understood what would hurt him more. A smack, or something he loves being taken away for a period of time, depending on the need for punishment. The latter has seemed to work so just naturally flowed through to my youngest. So, I guess smacking finished at 6 and 3. I guess as a parent, you learn how to deal with things as life goes on. There is no parent handbook after all.
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